I got in a car accident... help?

Yesterday (1/14/09) at about 2:50 p.m., I was driving with my boyfriend. We were on the way to his house and it was snowing and the roads were a bit icy. I just came off a turn and the car started to slide to the left of the road. From instinct, I turned the wheel to the right to try to straighten the car out. Apparently I overcorrected the wheel and I lost control of the car. It slid ino a giant ditch on the side of the road and I ran into a lot of trees.

Luckily, me and my boyfriend weren't hurt, but the car is damaged very badly. At the moment the car was crashing, I thought we were going to run head first into a tree and die. It was the most terrible thing that's ever happened to me, and it's my first car accident (I'm 16). This experience was so shocking to me, and still is.

I haven't been acting the same ever since this happened, and my dad is really upset about the damage on the car. I've been depressed, I have constant headaches, my neck hurts, and I have panic attacks every time I think about it. Sometimes it just replays in my head over and over again, and the crash is very vivid.

I think I'm mainly freaked out this much because I was the driver, my boyfriend was on the side of the car that got wrecked, and I thought he was going to die, and not me.

Can anyone please help me get rid of these thoughts or give me advice? Or just stories about experiences you've had like this. I'm open to any help.

Sometimes I feel that it would've been easier if we would've died in the car accident.

please help me...
Additional Details
*also, I was not speeding

HML

These things happen - that's why they are called accidents. I know exactly how you are feeling - i had a very bad accident last weekend. Like you, I skidded on ice while going round a bend and unfortunately rolled the car three times. I havent slept properly since it happened, it keeps playing over in my head - however Ive found that having my boyfriends dressing gown round me calms me down. Is there something that you could keep near to reassure you?
You really should go and see a doctor to get checked out - i refused the police's offer of medical treatmeat but ended up being taken to hospital the next day as I had internal damage. They can give you painkillers and something to make you sleepy. It helps to find something constructive to do like going to work, going out with friends etc - to take your mind of things. If your dad's concerned about the car, you should remind him that YOUR ok, cars can be fixed - thats what insurance is for!! If you want to speak more, in private, please feel free to email me xx

calipink22

Well, they're called accidents for a reason sweetie. It's not like you intentionally crashed the car. You're a new driver and you may not have a feel for the car just yet. Over-correcting is a common mistake and sometimes unavoidable. Only time will help with your situation. After all, the accident just happened yesterday. Give yourself time. At least you and your boyfriend came out okay, that's what important. A car is just a material object that can be replaced. Your life is more precious and can never be replaced. If you continue to experience pain and head aches visit a chiropractor. You may have some injury caused by the accident. You also may want to seek consultation from a therapist to help you come to terms with the accident and recover mentally as well as physically.

In the end, you'll be fine! You're alive and right now, that's the most important thing

Good luck to you

Nightrider

Hello young girl,
Accidents do happen. Unfortunate, but it does. This is why defensive driving, winter driving and emergency manoeuvres were taught to young drivers.

This is not the end of the world. I can give you my experience. I was driving early morning on a highway, over speeding (I was 20 at the time) and I must have dozed off a fleeting moment. I hit the soft shoulder, rolled over a few times, the car ended up in the ditch right side up.
Police did not charge me. As you can see I survived this to write to you. My girl friend was with me, she had a minor bruise on her rib cage - only because she had hit the gear shift handle between us.

We both survived, no major incidents. Car was a write off. We both saved to buy this new car. This brand new car only had 3000 miles on it. I had this similar nightmare you describe, for a year. I got over it.

Therefore, not to worry. Best way I got over it is to play video games where I crashed cars left right and center. That helped me a lot. Try that.

OC 007

Celeste,

Let me start with saying that I am glad you and your boyfriend are doing well and no one got hurt.

I had a similar accident a few years back during a snow storm. I know the rush, adrenaline, and shock involved in these situations. Not being able to do anything to prevent the accident is stressful.

having your parents upset with you in a natural thing, however know that they care more about your well being than the car. Even though right now it is hard to see, but with time you will see.

you are experiencing post traumatic stress. Just relax, and talk about it with your boyfriend, I know reliving it makes it tough. But you need to come to the realization that it was an accident.

With time you will be back on the road without a worry in the world. Oh, and get that idea out of your head thinking you were better off dead! That is not right, and you should not feel that way over a piece of metal...

Good Luck, and I am glad you guys made it out ok.

mtwaites

This can be a very scary type of event. It is sometimes very hard to drive in the snowy conditions. Just luckily no one was hurt. Also, it was just your own vehicle that had the problem along with your boyfriend. No you wouldn't have wanted to die in the accident. I know that your parents are upset with the damage that happened with the car, but their concern is more with you, rather than with the car. The car can easily get fixed again, but if you are your boyfriend got hurt, it would have been harder to fix.

George A

First- glad you both are alright.
For your aches and pains- it could be from stressing out from the accident or you could have sustained whiplash or minor injury in the accident. You might want to get checked just in case.

The panic attacks, anxiety is common after being through something traumatic. They will pass over time, but if they start to really affect you severely, you may need to see a counselor.

And the best way to combat the panic attacks is to get back on the road again & overcome your fears. No joke, I am being very serious- get back in a car and start driving again. You don't have to go back onto the streets at first- let someone drive you to a large empty parking lot or an access road that has no traffic on it so you can start out nice and easy.

Being 16, most of your accidents are going to be caused by inexperience. As you get older and drive more, you will become better in recognizing the littlest of hazards, develop a good defensive driving technique & continue to become a safer & better driver.

I've worked as a cop, EMT, and as a Professional Driver Trainer teaching 21 yr olds how to safely drive an 80,000 pound tractor-trailer- in all types of weather. I have had extensive drivers training myself (skid pad, pursuit driving, PIT training, etc) and even at 46 (I've been driving since I was 16) I am still learning new things about driving.

jenny_pizzle

You probably have whiplash from the accident, that is causing your aches and pains, if they continue i would see a doctor. And when your parents finally calm down about the damage things will get better. I know from experience that accidents are scary, especially when you slide in bad weather. The fact is you didn't die. You didn't seriously injure any one. It was an accident, and Its not your fault. I know you are freaking out about it now, but you might just need to sit down and talk with some one, like a counselor at school and that might just be what you need to make yourself feel better

UCANTCME

You are suffering from (PTS) post traumatic stress and this will pass in time but you need time to think about this and spend time with your family...

la raina hermosa

remember that u r alive so obviously god dint want u to die. Maybe he just wants u to appreciate life more and not take it for granted.

its only been a day
its not like its been going on for a month
calm down

of course youre gonna be scared
the only way is to face your fears
and that is to keep on driving

Ginny Jin

You need to get over it, fast. Otherwise it could end up affecting the rest of your life. You don't want to end up with PTSD.

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