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I have a 96 year-old father whom will not stop driving even though he has hit things.How can I get him to stop
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I have a 96 year-old father whom will not stop driving even though he has hit things.How can I get him to stop



    




sweet..dude..sweet..dude
put him in a home. You must live in florida b/c every old fart wants to drive but can't see the road.


Juicy
take his keys and drive for him


BHANU V. RAVAL
Rating
BE HIS DRIVER


campana
have his license taken away


nicegirlstormie
get a card board cut out then put it on the back of his car when not looing and attach a string to the wheel and
pretend he ran over a person then say one day that person could be real. or even take a sledge hammer and get rid of it so he can't hit anything period.!!!!!!!!!


Gail J
Take his car keys away,duh


Chainsawmom
You are really fortunate to have been able to share so many years with your dad. Driving is such an important part of a man's life, especially a man from his generation. Getting him to stop driving is going to mean that he not only loses something he loves, but also part of his freedom. It sounds like he has reached a point where driving is dangerous. I'd take the car away from him but make a point to take him out to drive at least once a week with you in the passenger seat. You still owe him from when he taught you to drive.


rejujubee
I say take his keys away and firmly tell him why he can't have his keys. My mother had a neighbor who had 4 accidents in a month's time all within a 4 house radius. This neighbor was 89 at the time and still attempting to drive. Her children had to take her keys completely from her and remove the car from the home. It was for the good of everyone.

Also, give your dad an alternative solution to transportation. Maybe all the children can pitch in and drive him around. Give him certain days on when everyone is available. Also, there most cities have commuter buses for the elderly that will pick them up, and take them to places like the grocery store, to doctors visits, to pick up prescriptions, etc.


jet drag-on
Rating
My Dad had a stroke and his driving was eratic and he went out in the middle of the night, so we "lost" all the car keys. He would look but not find them so he had to stay home. He had to depend on me to drive him since I said my insurance didn't cover another driver and he couldn't take my car. Simple solution to a tricky problem.


raisinbar
Rating
Take your father to his doctor, and give the doctor the heads-up
about his driving record. It will be easier to hear it from a doctor.
Sometimes, you have to just exercise tough love and tell him
the truth. Find a moment, take his hand, tell him how much you
love him, remind him of the unpleasant truths you were told by him, years ago, and be strong. Offer him alternatives to getting around.
Be sympathetic and verbally confirm all the things he will feel
by surrendering car keys. He needs to know that you understand
that this is a huge loss. Affirm that you've respected his decision
making and that you know he wouldn't put anyone in danger.
My father was only 75 when he had to quit driving due to
a stroke and Parkinson's. I candidly asked him how he would
feel if he hurt someone (especially a small child) and whether
driving would seem worth the price that someone else had
to pay, possibly with their life. It is a hard subject to deal with.
Above all, be tender towards his feelings. If he still remains
fixed on driving, suggest an elderly driving refresher course.
Trained professionals can communicate truth in a non-personal
way. As hard as it is to be firm on this, think of the regrets you would have if he hurt someone, or himself.


jenster65
Rating
Report him to the police, then appear to be in shock and dismay when they show up


Liz J
Rating
If you want your father to stop driving, scare him into quitting. If he is hitting things he could hit a child, that's scary, he should realize that. Good Luck, anyone that age is going to be hard headed and stubborn.


darthbouncy
It's imperative that you talk to his doctor and tell him you are concerned for your father's safety-- as well as the safety of everyone else in your father's vicinity.
You may want to call adult protective services in your area and see how they can help.


vkewl182
Be direct and Firm, but Gentle. You could say something like"Look I know it is hard to realize that time has done a number on your vision and memory, but as many accidents as you had what if you hurt an innocent person?" "And each time you drive you make that risk for others." Or something like "Hey, since I think its time to hang up the license and you may not how about you take a retest?" Best Wishes.


maureen
maybe call the registry, ask them, tell your father he needs to take a eye exam or a road test


Fabio
Rating
Tell him if he its somebody he might end up in Jail being some big guy's *****.


leslie h
Well tell him to stop driving because he might have an accident and he might get problems so it will be better if you make him to stay home because it's really dangerous for somebody like you father to be driving.


Pelican
Shoot him? No, dont do that. You'll have a rat's butt chance in heck trying to remove independence from an older person. Remember how hard you struggled to get yours?


Belly
You: dad youre 96 for petes sake

Dad: aaaaaaaaaand your point( coughs and wheezes from the long aaaaaaaaaaand)

You: Dad i really think you need to stop driving youre too old for this . Ever since I was young you told me not to let you drive past 70 and now YOUR 96!!!

Dad: (coughs ) ok son if I cant drive you cant drive either im 96 and your 70 so looks like we call it quits from here.

You: ok I agree.

Dad: said and done!

(shake hands and you swallow the keys and die)


tboyd1024
Rating
You have to take away his keys or his car altogether.


mafijozo_mafijozo
Rating
u must drive him where he want to go.he is your father isnt he.


Aria
Rating
My Granny was in her 80's. She was furious when Aunt *Rose suggested she stop driving. We even got kicked out of her house while visiting. So, they send me in. I failed. So my Dad disabled her car. He got a mechanic to say the engine blew and soon the tranny would need replacement. She said then I'll buy a new car. We took her to buy one, and she was shocked at what she'd have to pay. She said she wouldn't live long enough to get good use at a price like that. We had to do it and be sneaky because she had coke bottle glasses, had a hearing aid and drove like a bat out of hell. Her car is still available for use when the family goes to Texas. Granny G. passed but at least in heaven she's not mad at us for duping her.


jimo7507
Rating
take his coil wire off so it does not start


Mama Pastafarian
Are you one of Uncle Lloyd's kids? He's still driving at 98, and it scares me to see him on the road!

Anyway, how often does your father see his doctor? If he has an appointment coming up, call the doctor and tell him of your concerns. He could tell your father that he is not to drive anymore, and your father might listen.

Another option is to try to convince Dad to give up his license for only one month. Tell him that you and other family members will drive him where he needs to go. Hopefully, during that month, he'll realize how well life goes on without his driving, and that he doesn't need to drive. Maybe he'll start to enjoy the chauffeur service.

You could do this in conjunction with the above idea of removing the coil wire. If his car doesn't start, he can't drive! Then you and others drive him around until he starts to not care about not being able to drive.

The last option is desperation: Call the police when he drives. If they pull him over and tell him that he is a menace on the road, they could take his license away. This will upset him A LOT, and really make him mad.


Susan K
Rating
Bailey: I understand your worry and frustration about your father. My parents are older and driving with my mother has always been harrowing. My sister works for DMV in the state of Kansas, and her experience with elder drivers is this: if they know their routes and drive only to the store, doctor, church, etc. they are actually as safe on the road as anyone else. Being able to drive gives your father a sense of independence and worth as a human being that aging tends to take away from us. As long as he can pass the vision test and limits his driving to his home area, it's better to let him drive as long as he's physically able to do so.


bluffmike
Rating
I've been down that road with an elderly friend. We just had to clip his wings after he had a couple of pretty serious wrecks. Take his keys. You'd do the same for a friend who's been drinking.


mike67333
Rating
hide his license, then he has to take another test, Maybe he will fail the test.


truckergirl001@verizon.net
Rating
Hide his keys. If that doesn't work I believe there is a way to report him so the state will revoke his driver's license ( I know in Pa. they will do this if a person has had a stroke...it happened to my neighbor). His doctor reported him to the state, and he is no longer allowed to drive.

Contact your local DMV or State Police and ask if there is a way to have his driving privileges revoked. You may also try contacting his insurance company. They don't like covering people who have numerous accidents.

Hope this was helpful. Good Luck.


♥Mrs.JoeJonas♥
Rating
tell him nicely: Dad, im am a little concered about you driving at your age. Maybe you should stop and you would lower the risk of getting hurt. Maybe I (if you drive) could give you a ride or someone else you know.


Caffiend
Call the cops they next time he heads out. If they won't stop him them its on them when he hurts someone.


crystal_clear_0000
Call motor vehicle and ask who can you talk to concerning this matter because he is dangering himself and other motorist on the road children, pedestrians etc.... let them know this and tell them all the information you can to keep your father alive and the people that would be driving around him and they will take his license away and you can then stop him by taking his keys I rather take his keys then lose him or he end up locked up for killing some one or hurting some one this is serious what did not happen today may happen tommorrow! God Bless!





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