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Cybil_Bennet
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Only foster children will have their birth parents last name. When you're adopted, you are no longer associated with the birth parents, they have no rights, and you are legally the same as the adoptive parents biological children, so you get their last name. Children don't get a choice, it's just what's involved with becoming part of that family. Also, you can't take a child to the doctor, school, or anywhere else with special paperwork if they don't have the same last name that you do (had that issue after I got divorced!).
In marriage women have a choice today, because they're adults, individuals, and so on. So, if you get married you can change your name, or not, and the same goes for your husband too (although there's often more paperwork involved). But, if your mother gets re-married, you will keep your name because you're not being adopted by your step-dad and your bio-dad still has rights. |
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Smiler
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Speak to the child if they are old enough and ask their opinion. Get them involved in the process so they feel valued and excited. Some courts or adoption orders will specify if you can change the name or not. Speak to the social worker for advice as well. |
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Charlie
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"When you adopt a child you become the child's legal parent and they will usually take your surname. They will also inherit from you just as if they were born to you. Upon the granting of an adoption order the child's natural parents will no longer have any rights or responsibilities towards the child." |
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Cobra
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The adopted child should take up your surname but ask him once.He may be attached to his own surname as the are the only remainig part of his parentage.Most of the adopted kids love being given new surnames, surnames of people who are going to give them a new life |
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Opedial
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In our adoption they did not keep their surname. In fact technically we were not allowed to know the surname. (but our kids were older and knew it already)
They are legally part of our family. Surnames do change, it happens sometimes when people marry, when a woman marries a new man and he adopts the child etc.
The children do not have a choice in this matter. Having the same last name as their parents I think helps them feel part of the family.
Bring on the thumbs down but this is one area I do not always agree with the adult adoptees. (sorry) |
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monkeykitty83
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They usually take the new family surname, but it generally isn't a requirement of adoption. It's a family decision. Some still keep the old surname as part of their name even if they take the new surname as well. |
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Chang Min H
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Well when a person chooses to adopt a child the child usually takes their adopted parent's last name but to be fair to the child, I think that giving him/her a choice would be the best way, fairness and all, for the child may feel that they still want to make their blood-related parent a part of them. The last thing a parent should do is force the poor kid into giving up their surname. |
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Gabby_Gabby_Purrsalot
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I only know of one case when the kids kept their surname. It was a sibling group of four whose parents were killed in an accident and had ties to many biological relatives. In most cases though, they take the name of their new family.
We were being considered for an older child for a while, and he probably would've been 15 or 16 by the time he finalized. We would've let him decide how he wanted his name to be. |
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Hakomar
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I kept my surname, but it was due to be changed, which I did not want. I don't know if you have a choice or not, but I would ask the child first. |
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kjbnicholas
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In the UK, when the adoption order is granted through the courts, the surname can be requested to be changed then. it is usually changed to the surname of the adoptive parents.
Children are rarely adopted over the age of 7 years in this country so the adopters usually choose for the child. The child should have their old birth certificate anyway to help them understanding adoption when they are older
kx |
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Kate
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If the child is younger they tend to take on your name.
I know many older adopted children and teens and they were given the choice to keep their biological last names and they did. |
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Crucio
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Generally when someone is adopted they take on the surname of the couple/person who has adopted them. In the case of older children I suppose they could / should be given a choice. If someone adopts a child that is young they probably aren’t going to have much opinion nor care what their surname is. |
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destineeamber
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Well really it depends. If the child you are adopting is young, you can change the name if you wish. (By young, I mean like an infant through early elementary school, you know when they're first learning to write their names, so it's easier to remember.) If the child is older, personally I would give them a choice. Their name can provide a link to their biological family, and they may wish to keep that link. Then again, they may not. They may wish to completely start over with their new family and take a new name. My mom adopted three teenagers, all of whom chose to change their names. Their whole names, not just their surnames. |
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Leahnora
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they can hyphenate the name when they are old enough (take both your parents names ) |
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Happy Murcia
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They take the family surname.... |
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Scouse
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A friend of my daughter has adopted two little girls and given them their name. It saves explanations to those who have no business to know and you can talk to the children about how their adoption came to be over several years as they grow up so that there are no surprises and feelings of mistrust and betrayal later. The adoption agencies can be very helpful with guidance |
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Kat C
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Generally the child takes the name of the adoptive parents, except for cases where the child is older and already has a surname. Then it's the choice of the parents and the child together. Since most children are adopted as infants or toddlers, they just get the name the adoptive parents have. |
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Cindy B
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That is the only name i changed when i adopted my baby, was his last name. |
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Ollie
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Hi,when you adopt a child they will take your name. |
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Angie
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when you have a child adopted it takes on your surname, you can also change the christian name at this point (if the child wishes or is a baby still and doesnt know).. It is optional |
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Hayley France
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I don't know where you live but in the UK the child takes the name of its new family.
My little sister was adopted into the family and she took my parents name. Often when children are adopted it's because of abuse in their original home and all contact with the birth parents is cut so the name is changed for the childs safety. I'm not sure what the case is if the child is still allowed contact with their birth parents and doesn't want to change its name but I'm pretty sure it would still have to take the name of the adoptive parents. |
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Phoebe-X
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with adoption they will always take your surname. A few of my friends are adopted and they told me. |
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Rowan
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the child is given the adoptive parents last name, as they are legally the childs parents now. |
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