Adopting please help me!!!?

Randy B

Well, I'm 45 and my wife just hit 41 and we adopted an infant this past summer with one more approved for. We are just waiting a match.

I asked our worker about age limits and she explained that while they used to have one it was challenged under Canadian law and ruled discriminatory so now there isn't one. At the same time however the rest of the process normally screens out those who are not able to adopt or those who are looking to adopt a child of an age that may be too young. With older couples who qualify they would try to match them with older children. Of course, if they insisted on an infant then there are other ways to disuade them like putting them at the bottom of the list so that they either changed their age desired or just dropped out of the system. As long as the children are matched with suitable parents there is no need to say that someones file should go to the top of the list just because of their age.

Kazi

I have heard that some CAS agencies do not have an actual age limit, however, I would think that 61 year old would have to be in top-knotch shape and they would probably be only approved to adopt a much older child as in tweens or teens. Most certainly not an infant or toddler.

monkeykitty83

To be perfectly honest, I highly doubt an agency would allow a 61 year old to adopt. Private agencies mainly place infants and newborns, and by the time a newborn turned 18, your relative would be nearly 80. I think it would be a rare agency that would work with someone that old, and a rare expectant parent who would match with someone that old. Especially not when there are, on average, 40 healthy young couples waiting to adopt per 1 healthy infant actually available to be placed. I really don't think your relative has a shot at an agency.

However, I DO think your relative would have a very good chance of being able to adopt an older child from foster care, assuming the relative is in general good health. With an older child, the age difference is less extreme... and to be blunt, there's less competition with other families to adopt, and many more children needing good homes.

Adopting an older child has its challenges, but for committed and supportive adoptive parents, it's very worthwhile. There are thousands of children whose biological parents' rights have already been terminated, so they're available for adoption and just waiting for permanent homes. Fostering them first is an option, but is generally not required for children who are "legally free" to be adopted.

I would suggest your relative talk to your local department of family services and inquire about adopting an older child from foster care.

cantstopLinnyG

Each agency has guidelines as far as the ages of adoptive parents. Usually, if the parents combined ages is more than 85, the answer is no.

Adoptive children face enough loss, it's not fair to place them in a home with parents who could die before they are out of high school.

mom to be

In most IA the APs can not be more than 45 years older than the child. I think this is pretty typical.

Dan B.

i sure as h#ll hope not. kids need parents, not grandparents

JoHn S.

Is this someone wanting to adopt a family member? If not, I think they should seriously reconsider adopting this late in life. If we were meant to become parents at the age of retirement, it wouldn't be so hard to get pregnant at 60.

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