Adoptive Parents: We learn that we need to celebrate our adopted children's differences, but do you also...?

sweetjane

Hi Kazi,

We were just talking about this today. Grandpa took his grandson to church this morning and told us all about his day. He said, "DS walked into the reception area and there were tons of people in there. He looked up at me and immediately wanted to be held. He is **Just like me in that way. We are both scared of crowds**". While this may be mundane, for my dad it is a big step....as he is starting to notice all of the similarities between he and his grandson, instead of just the differences.
Since he is so young, it is difficult to tell what his likes and loves will be, but he is already proving to be a 'ham' like my husband and loves to read, like me. We are all night owls and HATE waking up in the morning. His favorite thing to do, so far, is to lay down with me or daddy and drink his milk and hold my hand or rub my arm. That is my favorite thing that he does as well. Ugh!! Some of these questions make me want to go and wake him up or just lay with him in bed.
<<foster-to-adopt mommy

Flying Monkey #073177

My dad likes cars and so do I. We both like old country music (shh don't tell anyone k?) we both have a strange sense of humour. I have no idea if I am like my amom, she got ill when I was 10 and died when I was 14. She spent most of that time living in hospitals and extended care facilities. I guess we both liked lemon chicken, every Wednesday they served it at the hospital and mom would have a tray sent up for me so I could have dinner with her, yeah I guess we both like lemon chicken from the G.N.H.

aloha.girl59

What a great question!

My son is a big ham, like me. We both LOVE to be the center of attention and both of us can talk like there's no tomorrow. We both love the water and have similar senses of humor (potty jokes, etc.). I can raise my left eyebrow and he can raise his right one.

Some differences are that he LOVES vegetables and will eat just about all of them (I hate 'em). He's also a big fan of fish -- any kind -- and I won't touch it. Not even shrimp! I am deathly allergic to cats and therefore don't like them much, but my son has a particular soft spot for felines. Turns out he probably gets that from his first mom. Cats are her favorite animal. :)

kateiskate

I have the same odd sense of humor as my mom and sister, my mom and I are both very stubborn and independent. I also share a love for cartoons, similar musical tastes, and a love for chocolate with my sister. My dad and I also share the fact that we are very stubborn and strong willed. We are also both very forgetful and sometimes not so great with money....lol.

Jennifer L

Absolutely!

I am an animal-lover, particularly, I'm a dog person. I really consider it one of my hallmark personality traits. I was the one that stray dogs always followed home from school, always asks to pet the dog at the park, etc.

My bio-son likes dogs, but he doesn't *love* dogs. My a-daughter tolerates dogs. But my a-son *loves* dogs, and other animals. I wouldn't be surprised if he becomes a vet (something that I should have done, but didn't).

It's especially interesting because people don't keep dogs as pets in Liberia. They had to get used to the idea of having dogs in the house and were actually fearful, at first. My daughter's grown to tolerate them. She likes our dogs, but really doesn't have a lot of interest in anyone else's dogs. My younger son, though, did a complete 180 and absolutely adores them. I have to remind him that not every dog is friendly and he has to ask permission before petting someone's dog, etc.

That's the first example that comes to mind. But there are other, smaller likes/dislikes that I share with my a-children. We prefer Burger King to McDonalds, like movies, sing along with the radio (even if we're out of tune), and many more little things.

Of course there are differences. But that doesn't mean that the similiarities need to be glossed over either.

Bay Raymond

I'm adopted myself...You might not want an answer from a 13 year old girl but I accualy want to be, well you know part of the pack...But I want to learn about my culture you know. You want the child to feel at home, but you also want the differences known to, like for instance my parents have a different sense of hummor than me, but they make it work for me, and also I'm twice as better at art and creative things than my family. soo....

Sophie

Yes, I acknowledge both the similarities and differences and remind him that each person was made differently (as is each family).

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