Anyone that had an abortion?

cantstopLinnyG

I had one performed at 7 weeks. It was like menstrual cramps. It took about 10 minutes. Side effects were minimal, no pain at all afterwards, sort of like a light period. I never had any emotional effects after the surgery.

They cost around $400.00 at a clinic, or, if you have health insurance, a small co-pay.No one will find out about it either, even if you run it through your parent's insurance if you are still a student. Its against HIPAA Rules to divulge that info. They bill it as a nondescript procedure.

Im not sure whay you're asking this, because this is an adoption forum. but I can tell you this- I had an abortion BECAUSE I was adopted. I lived with the pain of missing my first mom for 17 years, and there was no way in hell I would go through that for the rest of my life by surrendering.

***ETA*****
Oh puh-lease!! The comment that said, "every time a woman aborts, it takes away her chances of having a future successful pregnancy, when and if she desires to have a child" is a LIE. That statement was about as silly as "every time a bell rings, an angel gets it's wings". Abortion is a safe, quick and easy outpatient procedure.

You can go to http://www.plannedparenthood.org/ for more information, or call your gynecologist. They will give you correct medical information, not the ramblings of someone who wants your fetus, lol.

Independ"ant"

"What were the emotional effects after even months years later?"

Had one 20 yrs ago......barely remember it. Its a blip in my memory.

Looking back....I would have made the same decision.
No trauma no regrets.

Go to planned parenthood and they'll inform you of your options. Its free if you are low income or don't have insurance.

Edit: The procedure wasn't painful at all......had minor cramping for about 15 minutes after I woke up. It felt like mild period cramps thats it. I went to class the same evening and starting working out a week later. The staff will treat you very well and they always have a councilor/nurse there to be with you. Hasn't affect my fertility....currently pregnant and didn't even have to try. Sometimes you'll hear about infertility but I believe it has nothing to with abortion but more so with other conditions and women waiting too late.

boosh3

i had just turned 16 when i had mine. i wuz scared. afterwards i had cramps but they were just like period cramps, some spotting/bleeding for a while. i only remember waking up in the bed afterwards cuz of the drugs and i remember crying. for a while i regretted it, just a few months tho and then realized it wuz the best decision i could have made. no regrets!!!

MamaKate

Dear Pinky,

I had one when I was 18 after I was raped in college.

It was physically uncomfortable during the procedure but I was fine and have not had any long lasting emotional effects.

Here are some medical and first person descriptions:
http://familydoctor.org/online/famdocen/home/articles/846.html
http://www.fwhc.org/stories/perso.htm

I had two children for friends of mine when I was 20 and 23. They had been trying for 9 years and had two failed placements. Letting go of those children - even though that was the idea when I conceived - has destroyed the person I was and I suffer everyday with the choice that I naively thought was a noble and generous act. I was unaware of the damage it would do to myself or my children.

I now have two boys that I am raising and I would parent or abort any future unexpected pregnancies. I would NEVER surrender another child.

The woman experiencing this is the only one who can make this decision. Women need to educate themselves thoroughly from HONEST sources and choose what THEY think is right. There ARE other options besides just abortion and adoption. Each woman who faces this choice is the the one who will have to live with it - it is important make sure it is something, each as individuals, can deal with. What is right for one person is not always right for another, but we should support each other in our choices rather than sling blame and judgment *ahem* (other posters).

If you are facing this decision, you need to get as much information as you can from RELIABLE sources and make your choice based on what is right for you. Don't let others decide how you should or will feel.

lalalalalala

I agree with Ta-Zu. http://community.livejournal.com/abortioninfo/ is a great place to go for information and support.
The procedure itself was painful, but only for about 30 minutes. After that there was no more pain except for I pulled a muscle from having my legs so tense. Your emotions are a little crazy for a few weeks because of the hormonal imbalances, but if you think this over correctly and decide that abortion is the right route for you to go, then you should not regret it when it is all over. You may feel sad, or you can even get post partum depression, but it will pass if you know in your heart it was the right decision for you.
Here is another good website with detailed information: http://www.fwhc.org/abortion/index.htm
There is a lot of false information being given out here. Having an abortion does not increase the risk of losing future pregnancies. In fact, having an abortion has a lower risk of complications than actually giving birth. If you go to a competent doctor, nothing bad should happen, but there are risks. The biggest risk is infection, which the clinic instructs you on how to determine if you have an infection and you are told to go straight to the emergency room. The earlier an abortion is preformed the safer it is, too.

IDK!!

mine was done at the hospital. I went in and the gave me something for my anxiety, I was crying and shaking in disbelief. I was there 2 hours before the procedure. The gave me an IV and took me to the OR. I woke up a half hour later and was in a lot of pain. Lots of cramping and bleeding. For some reason I thought I had given birth, but when I came to I reality hit.

I have no regrets, as staying pregnant would have killed me, but I do have nightmares about that day. For months I would dream the it was all a dream and that I would wake up pregnant.

Weather or not you will have emotional pain really depends on your character.

The procedure caused a lot of scaring and when I had my daughter I nearly bled to death becasue the placenta ripped. I also had placenta preva because the lack of "good" uterus for it to attach to.

myusernameisbetterthanyours

If you are preg and considering abortion you need to inform yourself. Go to a clinic and get some info. There are different ways of doing it. Theres a surgical route and a non surgical route. There is a pill called RU-486 that can be taken up to and not after 9 weeks. There are four more pills after that too that you need to insert inside of yourself. There are risks, do some research on ALL your options, not just abortion

gypsywinter

""Oh puh-lease!! The comment that said, "every time a woman aborts, it takes away her chances of having a future successful pregnancy, when and if she desires to have a child" is a LIE. That statement was about as silly as "every time a bell rings, an angel gets it's wings". Abortion is a safe, quick and easy outpatient procedure. ""

Amen Sister! I lost my newborn to adoption and I also have had an abortion, and then conceived and raised 3 more children to adulthood. The loss of my firstborn to adoption has been a gigantic hole in my heart for 44 years... the abortion, never a regret nor any guilt whatsoever. I had no option but the forced option of forced pregnancy and adoption with my firstborn. I was thankful that the doctor would present me with the option of abortion early in my 2nd pregnancy. And No! BC pills were never an 'option' for me, my body simply would not tolerate them. One day later after the birth of my 4th child, I would have a tubal ligation....the best option for me!!!!

To the OP, the abortion procedure that I had done in the hospital was pretty much pain-free and no physical or psychological after-effects either.

DevonChaos

It isn't painful. It wasn't traumatic. It bugged me for a while when it happened, but I know I made the best decision I could, so I can't fault myself for it. I haven't shed a tear over it since the day I did it.

People are going to give you call kinds of crap for asking this question, but remember, they aren't you. You and ONLY you can know if this is the right decision for you. Don't listen to their religious pro-life stuff. It is your decision, and they are trying to sway you in their direction for their agenda.

If you think it is the right decision for you, that is what you should do. You don't owe your fertility to anyone. You owe no one a baby. You know yourself better than anyone here, so you need to make an informed choice on your own. I can only tell you my side, as I have been there.

ETA: For those who say it effects future fertility... I have 5 children now, including twins, who were naturally conceived. I have had NO health issues due to this. None. It is a rare, RARE thing for someone to have a problem with this.

jazminesmith8

I was raped when I was a Freshmen in high school, five years ago. I went to the planned parenthood clinic in chicago it cost my family about 300-400 dollars. I was put under after a sonogram to see the baby and then I woke up in a recovery room a couple of hours later but it felt like no time went on at all. I was very sick for a little while and I shouldn't have ate anything like they said, but I did anyway and I vomited. I don't regret my decision at all however at times I feel very bad about my decision and such when I was attacked by people and called a "baby killer" I was attacked my pro-life groups who thought I was a murderer even though I was raped, how unfair is that judgement?

It really depends on your situation and how you think you will be as a parent/ what you can give the child.

drkangel210e

I've never had an abortion, but I've had a D&C done for a missed miscarriage. It's essential the same procedure, it's just that in my case the baby was already dead. Physically, it's not that big of a deal. There was some cramping and bleeding after the procedure, but no big deal.

If at all possible, I wouldn't do a D&C again. There's a risk of getting Asherman's syndrome, and having problems conceiving later on in life.(I didn't know this, but something like 30% of women who have a D&C haves some level of scarring/Asherman's.) You may not want to get pregnant now, but it's traumatic to have problems in this area when you are wanting a baby.

I'm currently using the RU486 method (chemically induced method) to end another miscarriage at 7 weeks. (I have the worst luck, 2X in a row.) So far, I'm happier with this method as it won't be scarring my uterus and I don't have to go through surgery. I've been experiencing cramping and some sickness, nothing that bad.

As for emotional effects. Most women I've known who have had abortions wrestle with their emotions for years. Others don't have any emotional repercussions at all. Think about how you'll feel if years from now you have trouble conceiving or carrying to term. (This can happen for no reason having to do with the abortion, just bad luck.) Would you regret your decision to abort then? If having the miscarriages has taught me anything, it's that you can't count on things going well when trying to have a child. If this were your one shot to have a baby would you still want to abort it? If so, then that tells you that you'll have no regrets in that area at least.

Whatever you decide, your life will never be the same as it was before the pregnancy. Abortion isn't a reset button. Good luck with your decision. I know it's not easy.

Wow, I am pro life and am usually shocked when people choose abortion. But I am in disbelief as I've never heard people who have had abortions talk so nonchalant about ending a babies like. I'm just in awe.

I had a friend who chose to abort. It was absolutely horrible for her. She still to this day, 6 years later will cry about it. And she and her BF decided they wanted a baby 2 years ago. So far no baby.

Make sure you really look into all alternatives. There are so many people out there that would adopt your precious baby.

nikkiyayxoxo

my aunt had one, and this was over 20 years ago, and she still to this day cries over it all the time. and a side effect that happened to her is she is now almost 40 years old prays everyday to get pregnant and cant because it messed up her body someway. I'm not trying to lecture, but you could always give it up for adoption. because one day you most likely will want a child, and i know of many people who have had an abortion and cant conceive again.. and many people who can't have babies want one.

red elephants

Everyone will have different feelings about having an abortion. Some will think nothing of it and others will be destroyed by it. If you do a google search for "regret abortion" you'll get a number of sites from women who do regret having them and write about it.

This is the first site that comes up and has many postings about the emotional issues afterwards.
http://www.gargaro.com/abortion/regrets.shtml

I can't offer you any first hand knowledge because I haven't had an abortion. I know I could personally never go through with it or survive it afterwards. I hope these are just random questions and you are not having to make any decisions personally. If you do have to decide I hope you'll really do your research before hand about possible issues. You may be fine like some here have posted but there is a very real chance you will have regrets and emotional issues also.

sizesmith

My son's first mom and I talked about her having an abortion the year before he was born. She said that she'd never go through the emotional h-e-double hocky sticks that she went through that again. She also (10 months after our son's birth) said that placing him, and knowing that he was alright was still the best decision for her, and she wished she'd not aborted, because that baby is gone forever.

I know one woman who's boyfriend tried to help to abort a baby (this was decades ago, before abortion was legal), and it scarred her for life inside, physically, and mentally, because she ended up with a nasty infection. Although that's highly unlikely in a doctor's office, it does happen.

It does take time to heal afterwards. The IV's can be painful, like a shot, the hormonal effects are rough, and every time a woman aborts, it takes away her chances of having a future successful pregnancy, when and if she desires to have a child.

I also know a woman who's fiance found out she'd had an abortion years before, and he left her, called her a murderer and worse. Some around you might not think as highly of it. After working in a doctor's office, I saw another woman who had done 10 abortions, and kept coming in the office for referrals to a doctor who'd do them (so her insurance would pay for them). On the 10th one, the doctor refused the referral. I don't think any woman ever gets over an abortion totally. We're wired internally to nurture children. It's kind of like women who've had a miscarriage often wonder what their child would be like, and those who place a child for adoption often wonder where, and what the child is doing now. The best thing is to prevent pregnancy when one doesn't want to have a baby. It's not the baby's fault that someone wants to kill them.

Miranda

i have never had one, but i know many who have, i have held their hand through counseling. sweetie, it is a choice that will define you forever. It is a human being, if it heart beats its a live, no matter what doctors claim. there are many other options. some women go on somewhat fine. but other are emotionally damaged. the woman i know felt incredible guilt, and once its was over weren't sure how to deal. like any procedure you can have side effects. it can actually cause miscarriages in the future. but again, some recover fine others not to much. It depends on you, if you are a strong person, emotionally and physically. if you recover from illness or other procedures faster. many things apply. I just recommend that if this is something you are considering you please make sure to have an amazing support group around you. and to be well educated on the whole process. have people to care for you after and to talk to if you need it. Its a serious thing. I know i started to preach at you, but its true, its very serious. i do not judge though, and if this is happening to you right now, I wish you luck and hope everything goes well.

phoebe

i strongly encourage you not to abort if you, or anyone reading this, is considering abortion. adoption IS an option and besides, what did the baby ever do to deserve to die? you were the one who decided that you wanted to have a kid or something, and if more than anything the baby shouldn't choose to die because of your mistake, the baby didn't do anything so why would it die for something stupid that you did? and i know there are situations such as rape, but even then the baby isn't the one that did anything wrong. everyone deserves a chance at life, you got yours, why not give someone else their chance?

alyssa â™¥'s christopher :]

i have never, nor will ever have an abortion. but of course its painful...theyre scraping ur child off of ur uterus and suctioning it out of u...and u will go through years of emotional pain. i know of ppl who have had abortions and no matter what anyone says they regret it deep down. when u see other babies it will remind u of what u could have had, and what a perfectly good life u threw away.

Chantal T

I'm sorry but this is a pregnancy and parenting board, not a kill-your-baby board. I am pro choice but these questions are too much. If you are willing to go through with something like this it has to be a personal decision, not up to ppl on the boards late at night.

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