Are adoptive parents considered "less" of a parent if they don't contribute to charitable causes?

IDK!!

Actually weather we like it or not, a portion of our income helps struggling families each week, through taxes that provide many social services, anything above that should be from the heart.

Zuko

You're missing the point.

ENTIRELY.

What people are saying is that if most of the relinquishing mothers were given things like aid (or even made aware of the programs already in place to help them) they would never have to relinquish IN THE FIRST PLACE.

We're not against adoptive parents. We're against the profitable adoption industry. The fact of the matter is that most adoptions don't even need to take place...

It's been said here many a time... Adoption is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Unless you're infertile.

A child shouldn't be born with a job... (to negate the issues associated with fertility... to be the perfect son/daughter... to give their parents a purpose.)

ETA: To further clarify, the reason people are bringing up what you call 'charity,' is because if even HALF of the money spent on buying babies was spent on education and aiding single mothers, adoption in MOST cases wouldn't be necessary.

Andraya

Sorry but I am about to get high and mighty...

If I can afford to help those less fortunate everyone can.

I'm a single parent. I struggle like almost every other single parent I have met. I volunteer my time and money to worthwhile causes to show my children the joy of giving and to foster compassion in their little hearts.

If a family like mine can find an extra 20 bucks to buy a Christmas gift or school supplies for a needy child it only seems reasonable that those who spend tens of thousands to adopt can find that same 20 bucks.

But this isn't about donating to worthwhile charities, is it? This is about ending the societal view that more money = better parent.

Kazi

Personally, as a human being, I think we all have a responsibility to be of service even in small ways. It doesn't mean that people should hand over their wordly possessions or spend their nights getting the homeless of the streets, however, it actually takes very little effort to make a meaningful difference: instead of throwing out perfectly good clothes or toys, donate them to Good Will; Stock up on non-perishable food items when they are on sale and donate some to your local food bank; and so on.

Adoption is not charitable and frankly, I think any PAP who says that should be declined as an adoptive parent.

If you want to be a parent, adopt.
If you want to "save" someone, become a missionary.

Mom to Foster Children

We don't contribute to a charitable case or cause. We do reunification fostering with the option of adoption if it becomes available (we are trying to adopt one child who we tried to reunify). I don't see myself as less of a parent - we are adopting out of foster care where the children were abused / neglected...etc. I am not saying that their parents are less of a parent either - we are all their parents. They just came from one but by judges orders are forced to live with another! They are loved from all of their parents!

Gershom

If someone is going to act like adoption is a humanitarian service, then I will be arguing that there are other ways to benefit humanity than adoption.

Some people act like they're "saving" a poor child who needs it, yet they're contributing to the industry that is stealing children to fulfill the demand of wanting to adopt a child. Child trafficking is no secret, its happening in every country around the world. To ignore that and minimize the significance of that reality, in order to justify your ( not you specifically but anyone who does ) adoption, and turn it around and call it a humanitarian act, is insulting to adoptees, and especially the one who was adopted.

In my opinion "saving a child" who was surrendered due to poverty, isn't SAVING the child at all. Thats a lie. The child could have been "saved" in other ways, that would have directly benefited him/her and her family better.

Contributing to charitable causes doesn't make someone a good parent, it makes them a humanitarian who is wanting to help the well being of children. Adoption, isn't doing this at ALL.

XRAY

A parent is a parent. Should adoptive parents pay more taxes? Should adoptive parents not be allowed to attend social events that serve alcohol? Are adoptive parents, at the end of the day, not just plain ole parents like everyone else?

monkeykitty83

I think that any parent who is not making charitable contributions of some kind (which doesn't just mean money, it can also mean time or goods) is not setting the best possible example for their children. I think that helping others is something that has to be modeled and taught. I don't think they're less of a parent, though, just that they're making one parenting decision I strongly disagree with-- not the same thing.

This applies to both adoptive and biological parents. It also applies regardless of income level. Even when someone has no money to spare, we all can give a little of our time; that costs nothing except some effort and commitment.

I think if someone truly wants to adopt and the child is truly in need of a home, the person should adopt. Adoption is, after all, about finding homes for children who need them. But I do think people who are adopting should consider where the need is, and not just focus on their own desires for their child. Even so, I don't think it's a direct correlation to charitable giving.

Pregnant w/ our first ARMY BRAT

hmmm, i have never adopted a child but i dont think that not donating would make a couple less favored to be selected for adoption. if you are scared that it may effect it and you dont want to donate, just say that you have already donated to another charity.

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