Are those who are anti-adoption, pro-choice as well?

â€ Lawrence Râ€

As someone who has been involved in fighting for the unborn, and their parents, for the last 20 years and, as the adoptive father of 3 children (so far), I can say this. My experience is that most pro-lifers fall on the side of being pro-adoption. Most of us have at least one and, possibly as many as 8 or more, adopted children.

Those who are pro-abortion tend to also be against adoption, or at least against streamlining the process and making it easier to adopt.

I am always in favor of adoption vs. abortion. With adoption, at least in an open adoption, the biological mother has the strong possibility of reconnecting with their child when that child is older.

Our oldest son knows his bio-mom. He talks to her on the phone. We have a picture of him with her on our refrigerator. They have good relationship.

With abortion, a mother has a dead child. She can never see that child or have any kind of relationship with him/her. The mother, as well as the father, must live with the guilt that comes from the realization of their actions. And I know from experience that the "pro-choice" people will not be there to offer comfort and counseling for the post-abortive parent, outside of telling them to get over it.

Mei-Ling

Just because I am sitting here and declaring I am adopted does NOT mean my mother ever had ANY intentions to abort me.

Why does it seem like there are only those two options? You tell me.

Linny G

anti-adoption because I was adopted, and because I know how corrupt and damaging it CAN be.

I am pro-choice because it is my right as an American woman to control my reproductive system.

I do not believe in ill informed choices, either. That's why I post here.

***EDITED TO ADD*****

is she is 100% sure she does not want to raise her baby, she should have an abortion....it's her right to do so.

sweetjane

I am not anti-adoption....I am anti- unethical adoption. Big difference.

I am NOT for the sale of children. I am NOT for the sale of fetuses in-utero to 'pre-birth' matched adoptive parents. I am NOT for anyone profiting off of children's' loss. I am not for adoption in 'we can't afford it right now' situations. There are MANY programs available to parents to help them afford their child. All they have to do is ask. I am not for adoption in 'we want to find a poor pregnant mother to give us her child, whites only, no drugs' scenario. It isn't a grocery store, but a living, breathing child. If they want to be specific, they should make their own....if they want a child, there are 3.5 million in the US foster system right now. But, too often, they don't want these children...only $40,000 infants from a billion dollar adoption system. Since I find it horribly unethical to buy children from poor, uneducated mothers, I am against that type of adoption.....not all adoptions as a whole. I AM FOR adoption in abuse, neglect, and oprhaned situations.
And, yes, I am pro-choice.

<<foster to adopt mommy

Isabel A

I've got news for you, most women who are considering adoption never ever considered abortion. They are not the same thing and they are not tied together.
And many women who consider abortion often DO end up raising their children. It happens.
There is no proven correlation between abortion and adoption. They are not related at all really.
The only people who think that they are are the people who are pushing an agenda. Think about it.

Nurse Autumn Intactivist NFP

Im pro-choice, but I am also anti-adoption. (in the majority of cases anyways, I think there are cases when it is the best option we have, unfortunately)

However, abortion and adoption are NOT alternatives to each other.

Adoption is the alternative to parenting
Abortion is the alternative to pregnancy

They are made at 2 very different points in time. You can not consent to an adoption until AFTER birth. You decide on an abortion early in pregnancy.

People may choose abortion because pregnancy leads to motherhood, therefore they do not want to be pregnant. Adoption does not negate motherhood

ETA- Ok, if she was NOT going to keep the baby, then she should have an abortion. The baby will not know the difference, and children should not be created to be given away. What would hurt worse, not existing (and therefore not feeling), or knowing that your mother couldn't be bothered with raising you so she pawned you off on some other couple? (I am not bashing the majority of first moms, only those who know everything that we know here, and choose to do it anyway)

anastasia beaverhausen-the real1

anti adoption- based on personal experience.

pro choice- based on other people's bodies are not my business.

Gaia Raain II

I'm not exactly anti-adoption. Until we find something better to replace it with, adoption from foster care is still necessary (here and in other countries - but I'd prefer to keep kids where they are whenever possible).

I'm on the fence about abortion. For my own body, I'm pro-life. I have close friends who are pro-life, and I "get" that point of view. However, I am "publicly" pro-choice. I have no business deciding what another woman does with her own body. I've known women who have had abortions and I completely support their decisions for various reasons. I can't say I've ever personally known anyone who had an abortion I could consider frivolous (and even if I did, it's not my place to judge that). Also, after learning how other countries view "life", and after listening to adoptees here speak about their own feelings, I cannot ignore the fact that abortion is a viable, and even humane, option. If you want more detail, email me (I just lost my old account, and I used to just copy and paste...it would take me some time to find my old post about this, but if you want a deeper explanation, let me know and I'll find it and email it to you).

Besides, as others have said, adoption and abortion are not related. Abortion is for those who do not wish to be pregnant, or to complete a pregnancy. Adoption is a decision of whether or not to parent. After you've given birth, whether you parent the child or not, you're a mother. It's just a fact. And to be a childless mother is a whole different (and arguably much, much worse) experience than being a woman who had an abortion.

ETA: In response to your edit. No woman can make an informed decision about whether or not she wants to parent until she has had the chance to hold her baby in her arms, look into his/her eyes, count his/her fingers and toes, and hold her baby to her breast. A choice made before these events is not truly a choice. Not an informed choice, at any rate. If a woman knows with absolute certainty that she does not want to be pregnant, then an abortion would be best. Again, the childless mother thing. Also, a child just born expects his mother. No other woman will do. He has heard her heartbeat, her voice, felt her emotions, he knows her smell, her diet...he expects his MOTHER. Babies aren't stupid. A baby without his own mother is going to grieve. Sometimes this grief lasts into adulthood, and indeed throughout life. Sometimes it's buried and resurfaces later. Is it really a good idea to put a baby through that?

Yes, I dislike that we have this culture that supports separating mothers from their children unnecessarily. Most adoptions are not necessary. And forcing children to grieve their lost mothers unnecessarily is not a good thing, in my opinion.

opedial

One has nothing to do with the other. It is an illogical, circular argument. They are two separate issues, anything else is propaganda.

Lillie

Yes and yes.

Nobody should be obliged to fill the empty cribs of the infertile.

Your life, your body, your future, your choice.

Jennifer L

From my observations, yes.

There are many people on this forum who have said repeatedly, that it's better to have an abortion than place a child for adoption.

corcoranfaire

Pro-choice and think women should be able to make their own reproductive choices.

Adoption should be available for all foster children when it is in their best interest and the parents are unable to appropriately parent. I see foster adopt and infant adoption differently. I am sure there are some mothers who are uninterested and unwilling to parent their child, but many who are just poor or pushed into it. It doesn't leave me comfortable with that choice.

I am pro-child!

davya85

I am pro-choice, meaning I believe in ALL choices that are given to a person. I don't believe in one choice over another.

Minnimouse

I am pro-choice, apart from situations where children are in danger (abuse/neglect situations) then I am anti-adoption.

You might say well...that is opposite to pro-choice because you are taking away the choice of the mother to adopt their child.

However, even though they are options a person might consider if they cannot keep a child, the two aren't truly related and shouldn't be compared. Would you tell a disabled person "would you have rather been aborted?". Somehow I think most people would find that extremely offensive. It is the same as saying to someone that is adopted, it's lucky we survived because, being unwanted, we could have been aborted. Don't you think that would make someone feel worthless?

The reason why I am anti-adoption (apart from in cases where the child needs to be protected) is that the baby or child has absolutely no choice, their identity is changed without their permission and they are expected to be grateful for the life someone strange has given them.

To me that is an abuse of choice. I am very much pro-choice.

Lori A

If you want to label me as anti adoption then so be it. I don't like the system as it stands today. I want a new system. I want mothers to make informed decisions, not slanted, one sided, half baked decisions. I am pro choice for more reasons than just adoption vs abortion.

Maureen

I see a lot of anti adoption people here that suggest only the birth mother can give the child she is carrying the love he/she needs. It doesn't seem to have anything to with abortion.

I don't think adoption or abortion is any worse or better than the other method. It's up to the mother and whatever she chooses is best for her and her situation.

Joachim AASR

When it comes to a child, politics makes no difference.
Every child deserves a good home with parents who love and nurture them. period.
I have two adopted children and they don't care about my screwed up adult exertions on life. They just want a daddy.

Don't let politics interfere with parenting.

enki90

I am pro-choice and I am also pro-adoption.

I don't see any reason why those two concepts can't co-exist.

stormwarnfm

I am 100% ethical adoption.

In my eyes, the only way I would endorse abortion is if the baby had some disorder discovered in utero that would give the child no quality of life.

I have never believed in abortion for an "oops, I got pregnant" quick fix, unless the life of the mother would be in jeopardy to carry the baby.

Those would be the only 2 instances I could see seeking abortion.

Keep in mind that as with any situation...you mostly only hear the bad because that's what's "worth" talking about.

Those that have had perfect adoptions, like mine...and it was through foster care, even...don't really have anything to talk about...so you never hear the good side in public forums.

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