Can I adopt a baby?????

Gaia Raain

The BEST choice for any child is always their own mother (provided she is non-violent, non-neglectful, and does not have an addiction that impairs her ability to care for a child). Second best would be someone else. Not that I don't think you'd be a good mother, I'm sure you'd be great. But children know who their mothers are, and it is traumatizing to be separated from them.

Be aware that your friend can not give her child to you, legally, until after she has given birth. Which means, she could very well change her mind. Make sure she knows about all the financial resources available to single mothers, and the trauma that children suffer when they are separated from their mothers, before you agree to anything.

If she still wants to go through with an adoption after having given birth and holding her child, why not do a guardianship instead? Adoptees are not treated equally under the law. Their birth certificates are falsified, putting the names of the "new" parents in as the people who created them. And they have no legal right to access their own information.

Adoption is rarely necessary, and usually harmful to the child in one way or another. (Now, they may not remember the separation trauma when they get older, but then they MIGHT remember it. And they may never want access to their own birth certificate, but then they MIGHT want it.)

Best of luck.

CrazyCatLady

I think your friend needs to think about this A LOT more. It's not like giving you her favorite cd or a shirt she's outgrown. We are talking about a baby here. A baby that has a right to be with his/her mother. A baby is attached to it's mother at birth. Do you really want to break that attachment. I think your thinking is great and it's great to help your friend out but adopting her child is going too far in my opinion. Perhaps you both could get a place together and you could help her raise it since you are financially stable or at least let her live with you until she is on her feet. As much as you would like to adopt her child the most important one to think about is the baby. I assume after you adopt the child that he/she will still have contact with it's parent and I assume your friendship won't end. Well what happens when the baby grows up and has to ask why his/her mommy gave them up? Do you want a kid to feel rejected by it's own mother?

You have a lot to consider and so does your friend but I wish you all the best!

â™¥â™¥Ritaâ™¥â™¥

This OKlahoma State Statute would disqualify you from adopting due to your age.

Â§10-7503-1.1, The following persons are eligible to adopt a child:

1. A husband and wife jointly if both spouses are at least twenty-one (21) years of age;

2. Either the husband or wife if the other spouse is a parent or a relative of the child;

3. An unmarried person who is at least twenty-one (21) years of age;
or

4. A married person at least twenty-one (21) years of age who is legally separated from the other spouse,

You would probably also need a home study, background check, fingerprint and a child abuse registry check.....this is per elements of the Adam Walsh Act.

This could get quite extensive and then there is the question of the father; you live in Oklahoma so is the child Native American and does ICWA apply and it sounds as if your friend has not thought this through.

The first part of this answer is directly from the link below....

Sarah W

I think that if she is even considering keeping it herself that maybe she isnt really as sure as she says she is. Maybe she should take a little more time to think about it. Giving a baby up even to a best friend is a huge decision. Just play it safe and make sure that this is really what both of you want. You are only 19(not that its too young) and having a baby can put a lot of life that you still have to live on hold. It is a huge responsibility. Just want you to be sure. whatever the decision is best of luck

Zeena

Make sure that the father is willing to cut off all ties from the child(even though he is not recognized as the father), otherwise, down the road he can potentially take you to court for custody.

Ariana R

A lot of adoption agencies are very strict about what kind of people can and can't adopt children from their service.
However, I'm pretty sure that as the child's mother she is able to chose anyone she wants to give her baby to.
Adoption will require the father's consent unless there is some reason that he cannot give consent (he's dead, not around, etc.)
I've attached a link to OK's adoption laws.

lucylu+benji2

I don't see why not? You'll have to hire a lawyer to have the legal documents drawn up.

twisten

YES YOU CAN,
its called relinquishment adoption,
she just signs over the papers to you legally and you take the baby home with you.
it is my personal choice for adoption,
warning,,,,,
there is legally a 6 month period that she has to change her mind and take the baby back for any reason.

Corn is not dog food! No wheat!

Private adoption is what you're looking for.

With private adoption, pretty much anything goes. Your friend can "pick" you as an adoptive mother and the paperwork will be handled legally and with no problems.

BUT

It's not cheap.

Both of you need to sit down with an adoption lawyer, pronto.
Where's the baby's daddy? Is he gonna sign the papers?

EDIT TO ADD:
No agency.
The only time you'd need an adoption agency is to match babies with parents. You've already done that. Go to a lawyer.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: