Did you or did you not have a good sibling reunion? If not, why?

Robin

I have a sort of mixed bag of outcomes regarding my siblings. I have 7 (1/2) sibling all together.

I located & met my older 1/2 sister first. She knew all about me & put me in contact with our b.mom on our first visit. We stayed in contact for the first about 7 years. She moved out of state & we have since lost track of one another. We didn't have a lot in common, but she was very open to my being a part of the fam.

I met a younger 1/2 brother the following weekend. We clicked immediately. Sorta like sibling 'love at first sight'. I lost contact with him many years ago, though I have recently found his son on myspace & hope to reestablish a connection. His full sister has never had any desire to meet me. (1983)

I've met a 1/2 brother & 2 sisters on my dad's side (1986) & for several years ('92-'04) had a very close relationship with one 1/2 sister who lives in the same state, spending holidays together, etc. She married 4 years ago. Her new married life is too full for us & tho we are in contact, it's not as regular. I often feel kinda sad & miss her & my nieces & nephew very much. I am in regular contact by email with our other 1/2 sister (dad's side) who lives out of state. We met in 1995 & also felt an instant connection.

If you're not in a support group, you might consider finding one (live or on the net) as you move through this emotionally charged time. Try not to have expectations yet at the same time, be open to new relationships. Don't expect that you'll feel an instant connection (you may not) but don't be surprised if you do. I didn't take the youngest sister not wanting to know me as a rejection, because really, she didn't know me.

You may want to take a few steps back & go at this a bit slower since you're feeling overwhelmed at the moment. It's a lot to take in all at once. Best wishes & good luck!

anastasia beaverhausen-the real1

the money doesn't mean much. i found a sister who is richer than god. she doesn't care one bit about how much or little i have.

she cares that we're sisters. she's extremely important to me, and i am to her.

we absolutely love eachother.

one thing- i think we went a bit fast at first and i needed to take a break. we're completely closer than ever, but i wish i didn't miss those few years of taking a break.

Rowan

mines not as happy as i wish. I was adopted, and while i grew up around my younger full sister, we;ve never been able to establish a relationship. i've tried, but, after awhile i realized i might be pushing myself on her. My older half brother also sees to not want a realationship.Sadly, i feel such a gap between us, and i know no matter how hard i try, unless he and she want one, it'll never happen.
We live in the same city, and are no closer. its sad.
I don't know where they live, i have 3 nephews and 2 nieces i've never laid eyes on. Well, the one i have, but not the others no.
When my adoptive mother died, my half brother, along with my bio mom and dad, attended the funeral. My half brother hugged me when i cried. i thougt that might mean the start of something. But..not yet.

âœ§ â“â“˜â“›â“¨ â™¥ kaelers, emy & bella

I have had a good one and a bad one.

My elder half-sister from my mother's side lived with her father. She's two years older than myself, we were reunited when I was 15 and she was 17. She was pregnant and was doing some GED program... I was already in college and doing well. We grew up in different worlds, I guess. It wasn't terribly unpleasant, but I was very disappointed and upset because I did not ever think I would have another family member like my mother. I was naive and assumed that my mother was the only bad apple, and that the rest of my family would be more like my grandparents than her.

My reunion with my biological dad and my younger half sister was much happier, also when I was 15. I moved to the same area that they all live in which my mom had moved away from while pregnant with me. I grew up with my mother telling me what an awful person my father was and I was so nervous that he'd hate me and be this awful obnoxious guy, but luckily he wasn't. We met for lunch at a diner and had a good time, and 7 years later, I'm still very close with my biological father, step-mother and little sister. They're a nice, respectable family and I'm not ashamed of my association with them as I am my older sister.

Some things to do at a reunion:
- Act like you're just meeting a stranger, not like they're your family. Detach yourself for a little while to avoid getting overemotional and just ease into it.
- Be yourself and don't try to put on a production.
- Make friendly conversation, but at the first meeting, don't get too personal and in-depth. Just get to know them as if they were a friend and not a long lost relatives.

Some things not to do:
- Don't bring up touchy subjects at the first meeting.
- Don't make it all about the adoption or separation; just try to get to know each other as people instead of siblings.
- Don't stress about the socio-economic differences or let your jealousy show.
- If you feel yourself getting too overly-emotional or stressed out, don't stay and try to push through it; just end it politely and on a positive note, and wait until the next time you're in contact and you're more collected.

Good luck to you, and I hope your reunion is a happy one!

Anha S

Finances didn't matter to sister and I. We were overjoyed to be reunited, took it way too fast, both got hurt and overwhelmed, and ended up not speaking for a very long time. I recently contacted her again, and we are taking things slow, and really getting to know each other. I guess that's the biggest thing I'd advise is to take things slow and keep things open and honest.

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