Do i have a choice when it comes to my children's permanent placement?

my 3 little ones got in the system of child services. Fortunetly they are with my mom. I did everything dcfs asked (parenting classes, drug testing, aa meetings etc. I hadn't worked in 10 years and the worker insisted I have a job, finding one seemed impossible. my relationship with their father deteriorated. he left, i lost my home and felt helpless. my whole world changed. I had been a stay at home mom for so long and ....just was lost and unsure how to start life with out my kids. 2yrs has gone by now and 6 months ago I went to court for the plan 26 hearing and was told they wanted to terminate parental rights and that I dcfs had already started adoption with my mother. Do I have a right to choose legal guardianship or adoption? I was never even asked. the father is out of the picture and has been notified thru the newspaper of the terminating his rights. I have been working now for the last four months, and today I am moving into a house that I am renting a room. Life is getting better, but my heart still aches endlessly for my children. Not a day goes by that I dont long to be there for them 24/7. I've missed out on so much. DCFS doesnt care, My mom has the big house, a good income, etc. Why would they give them back to me when I have an income that pays my rent and bit left over.
I have court in 2 weeks and need some REAL advice. Do I have any rights? I was silent thru all the appearances, being thankful my kids are with my mom and not separated ( I have 3). My mom says just leave it alone and let her adopt the kids and DCFS will go away. I'm lost, have I really lost my kids forever?

Dream_Weaver

When your children first went into the system, you should have been visited by their caseworker who would have gone over a caseplan with you. The caseplan should have listed all the things you needed to do and in what time frame to do them in. You would have signed that caseplan agreeing to the conditions. If you started to make progress in the beginning and then faltered and made no progress for the majority of the time, then children's services agrees that you are not following the caseplan and will file for permanent custody which terminates your rights. If your rights have already been terminated than they will try to find a family placement which will most likely be your mother since they have been living there.

If your rights have not been terminated, then you need to SPEAK UP! If you are doing what is in the caseplan than they cannot deny you your children. If there is more to this story than what you are sharing, you may need to rethink the choices you've already made before going into this.

If they did fully terminate rights (which I would assume since they've started adoption proceedings) than you are no longer considered their mother in the eyes of the law. You have no more say in their lives beyond what your mother allows you.

anastasia beaverhausen-the real1

is your mom allowing you to see them whenever? is it possible for you to move in with her or closer to her so you can be involved?

it sounds to me like you are making great progress! good for you on that.

dcfs doesn't care....i agree. i think i would probably work on my relationship with my mother and try to be as involved as possible. make your wishes known to HER, though. that she might be able to try guardianship?

your kids need their mother, so i truly hope you can be with them.

Michelle L

I would ask this question to your social workers. By being silent, you may have missed the opportunity to regain custody of them again. I would also prepare an answer to the question of how you plan on regaining full responsibility as a parent and how you have prepared yourself to deal with your own addictions and the stress of parenting.

Rowan

That's awful. I'm so sorry for what you are going through. Call a lawyer, and don't sign anything. Why in the world is your own mother telling you to just let her adopt them? Granted,DCFS will go away, but so will any and all rights you have to your kids.

HappyMomAnna

You need a lawyer....

Go to the hearing at your best... Find information and make some calls to set up any kind of support services your would need for the children.

Meaning--be able to tell the court that you have a doctor you have consulted with, a dentist, you have been to the school they would attend and have the enrollment information... You have found a counseling center which would be great help for when the family was reunited.

I am so sorry this has happened in your life.... I can understand how this happens and the important thing is that your mother may be doing the only option there is with the state. If the state has to make an adoption plan then your mother may not have been given any other option....

You could ask the court to consider giving your mother legal guardianship instead because you would like to have the chance to be a family and didn't understand things wouldn't be just the way they have been for the future.

Understand the requirements that we in the past case-plans. Bring all of the proof that you met the conditions of the case plan.

Bring your own parent advocates with you. People who are supportive in your life (and not the new boyfriend).

Bring the receipts for your utility bills, and any other important paperwork like car insurance....

There are regulations for the states about HOW long children can be in foster care before a "Permanent" Placement plan MUST be made. During the 2-years if you were not working the case plan you were given and didn't keep your visitation with your children then the state is mandated to make sure your children are safe with someone who will.

The state's have to look for Relatives of the children before looking for non-related people. When there are relatives of the children who are able, willing and pass the home study it is always considered the best choice.

When children are place in "Foster Care" the state is the legal parent so they do not have to give you any say so in what happens.... If you were not meeting the case plan goals or actively doing every thing you could to have your children returned then the state has no choice but to make sure your children are cared for.

Allowing relatives to adopt means the state can close the file for the children knowing they are being taken care of. The State should get OUT of the lives of families that are doing well....

Depending on the state, and exact details of your case your May or May NOT be able to have any say so. The only way to know is to Say what you want to Say about the details.

You may be able to work out visitation.... When it comes to the court the only way you can Get something is to Make sure you put it into writing---and that you present it to the court....

RPMR

Look for a lawyer! Get them back! And no, you don't have a hoice as far as the permanent placement goes. I am so sorry for what u are going through.

LUCAS loves BEIN a DADDY

dont be silent look for a lyrer

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