Do you think its wrong to adopt children and have biological children?

Fleur

Interesting question =) I have no personal experience but I've been planning the same thing actually. I don't know how many kids I'd like to have, maybe 3 or 5, but I'd realy like to adopt and have my own baby as well. I'm quite young so it might change later - maybe because of a future husband or partner - but I wish my dream will come true. And I'd really love to have a rainbow family =). Well, OK I tell you: I'd love to have an Asian boy, an African girl and my own baby boy/girl. And it's not a Jolie-Pitt effect. I've been planning this since I was 12. And I hope I'd love them equally. But I'm sure about it.
Well hope it was some help or at least a good story =)

medusa

Technically nothings wrong with it, but being adopted myself I find it hard to imagine my parents having a blood connection with another child, it's possible to work out well but even if you treat them equally theres a chance of jealousy. I have a friend who's adopted and has a brother who's biological to the parents and even though its fine now thee was a bit of tension for the first few years.

mum to KitKat âœ¿*~.â€¢*Â¨`*â€¢âœ¿

Nothing wrong with it but as with any family that is large you should be sensitive to their individual needs on your time and attention.

Kazi

While I don't think there is anything wrong with both adopting and giving birth, I do have serious concerns with adopting around the world, just to adopt from around the world. I am an adoptive mom of 2, our first is from China and our 2nd is from domestic foster care and he is white (like us). Transracial adoption is not something to be treated in a cavalier manner. Culture, language, heritage and the inherent losses that go with leaving your home country behind are a HUGE part of transracial adoptive parenting and I'm not certain that bringing many different cultures into a household would allow you to honour and celebrate all in equal measure.

monkeykitty83

No, I don't think it's wrong to have both adopted and biological children. I think it can be challenging, and you should be aware that your adopted children will probably have some needs that are different from your biological children, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. All families have challenges. As long as you're loving and supportive of your children-- all your children-- and respond to their individual emotional needs, you can make it work.

I think you should do a lot more research on international adoption, though, between now and then. Being a successful multicultural household takes forethought and care; it doesn't just happen by accident. Making a transition to a new country and a new culture isn't easy, and you need to read about what it's going to entail. There are things about international adoption that are really hard, so make sure you're educated and aware going into it.

â™¥daydreamâ™¥

I think having a diverse family is beautiful. I would just make sure the child understood their heritage and learned the cultures of the nation where they were born.

$h!tBird

I came from a family of biological children and adopted children. we were all very well taken care of and loved. The adopted children were not treated differently or any less loved. they always knew they were adopted and why their real parents gave them up and knew they had a nice loving home. they never even looked for their real parents, I guess they knew enough about them and were well adjusted

froggsfriend

I don't think there is anything wrong with your idea at all. I think if you have the love to give then you should give it wherever you can. Too many people limit themselves and are able to show love only to their own. If you have the financial ability to adopt others, even if from another country, and can adequately provide for them and give them a home full of love, then that sounds like a terrific thing to share. Best of luck to you in your future.

Sofiakat

That is what we were planning to do. We adopted first. Then, realizing that my son had RADs and needed all the attention we could possibly give him, we decided not to have bio kids. He is our first priority. His happiness is more important than any need we may have to procreate.
If he were emotionally healthy like his sister, we probably would have had a bio child as well.

Doodlestuff

I would do research on this specifically addressing how the adoptees and siblings felt about it. I've seen a LOT of negative comments both from social workers and adoptees that adoptees are treated as second class citizens when the parents have biological children after adopting children. In fact, the rules of some countries require the adoptees to be the YOUNGEST family members and that adoption proceedings are stopped if the adopting parents discover they are expecting. I don't otherwise have an opinion either way given that the only examples I know of, the biological children were adults or nearly adults when the couple adopted children from other countries.

MKO

When I was young, I too thought I would like a big family. I do have 4 kids, and I cannot believe how expensive it is. First, with 4 kids and 2 adults, you need to order 2 cabs, 2 hotel rooms, etc. A family pass does not mean "family", it means 2 adults and 2 kids. Then there is university, weddings and the shopping! Please don't get me started. With 6 personalities living under 1 roof, there is always something going down. I can't imagine adding more kids and different cultures. I think it is a great concept but not an easy way to live. You will find kids a challenge as it is, take 1 kid at a time and adjust. Remember a burnt out mother is not a very pleasant person to be around, just ask my kids. I find I struggle to be fair, neutral and consistent with my 4. It may look great on TV , just remember that the celebrities have nannies, maids, gardeners, etc. So unless you can employ a full staff, I wouldn't even consider it.

Carnie C

so you're saying you want to travel around the world and pick kids up like t-shirt souveniours?

Randy B

Nope. Not at all. We've done both. Adopted 2 (with one more expected) and gave birth to one ourselves. No regrets, no hesitation.

redsox8000

i think that is a great idea!!! : )

Crucio

No there is nothing wrong with it. As long as all the children are loved equally or none are favored more than the others. There is no shortage of children in this world that need homes and families. Perhaps if the world only had 100 children who needed families then I could understand those children strictly going to person/couple who has no biological children.

evian

JustMe

there's nothing wrong with that at all...i think that's great..your children can see and learn about different cultures and things like that...it's a great idea...and if you still think people think you crazy then look at brad and angelina their children are from other countries as well....smiles

Gravenimage

There is nothing wrong with that at all! We need people like you in the world to make it a little better for the unlucky ones. As for me, I am not entirely closed to the idea of adopting children either. I would definitely still have biological children too though, as I believe that all forms of birth control, including pulling out, condoms, and the pill are wrong in God's eyes. I believe that each and every child is a blessing from God, and that by using birth control you are telling God that you don't want his blessings. Or even that yes, they are blessings, but not after I've 2! So I guess I'll have a really huge family if I also adopt children!

Sophie

No, I don't.

Bizzi

No... as long as it's done right...and the kids NEED to be their and adopted... and you know for a fact and not what some one told you.

Then your an angel....

If that child was not in need of protection and adoption... then you have just done the most horrible thing you could do..
and i don't know what you are...

I guess you just kinda gotta decide what you are.. yourself..

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