Do you think that foster children should be forced to return to bio parents if they don't want to?

Kaycee

they should have a say in it. if the child is scared and upset about going to the bio parents then they should not be forced to return to them. well they were put up for fostering for a reason because the parents couldn't look after them, so why should they have to go back to that crap?

snovak49849

it would really depend on the situation. There are too many unsaid things to give an answer to that question.

chloÃ«

no they shouldnt. but at the same time they dont have much choice.

MamaKate

It would depend on several factors including, the age of the child, the child's reasons for not wishing to return, the thoughts of any therapists and/or doctors involved, the opinion of the child's GAL or CASA and the SW about why the child does not wish to return, etc. (If there is good reason and there is evidence to support this, these things need to be presented to the presiding Judge for consideration.)

Many children have difficulty with transitions and it is not uncommon for children to have anxiety about retuning to their previous homes from foster care. Some children will say they do not wish to leave the foster home because they are afraid of hurting the foster parents. Some will not wish to return because they want to stay with other children in the foster home. some will say they don't want to go home because they have fears about their past (this needs to be addressed by a professional!!). Unless there is a good reason for the child to not return, most Judges will order a gradual return to the home along with family counseling and monitoring. If there is a problem then the child will be removed again.

Foster parents who have a child who is expressing fears about returning to their previous homes should do the following:

1.) Listen and talk honestly about the child's concerns. Encourage them to be positive and be supportive of the reunification efforts.

2.) If you suspect a serious danger or a legitimate concern that is not being addressed, keep notes and records.

3.) Speak with the child's SW, GAL/CASA, counselor, doctor and/or therapist about the child's concerns. Make sure that they are aware of the child's feelings and are addressing them appropriately.

4.) If the child is of age to speak for themselves in court, encourage them to do so. Most Judges are focused on the child's best interests and are glad to include the child in the decision making process. If the child is afraid to testify or speak to the Judge, letters are often accepted.

5.) If possible, discuss the child's concerns with the other parents. Work together to make the transition as smooth and positive as possible for the child.

6.) Offer to stay in touch. Every child can always use another person who loves and care for them in their lives. If you can remain a positive in the child's life and support them in their lives, the chances of them not returning to care are lessened and if the do need to return, they will have a support already in place.

i love my life

you know i am in foster care
and i have been in it for a while and i know that i dont want to see my mom and i know that sounds bad and stuff. but i really dont care to see her. because she wasnt in my life growing up, so no if the child doesnt want to see their real parents dont force that child to. and if that child wants to stay there let him/her.

All Day Everyday

i believe the child should have the right to chose their parents. they shouldnt be forced to go with the bio parents if they dont want to. they were put in foster care for a reason because the bio parents couldnt take care of them. the child should be placed with the foster parents if they really want them.

SoItGoes

Their wished are usually taken into account. Of course they shouldn't have to go back to their biological parents, and if they are afraid to, usually a social worker will make sure they don't have to. The wellfare of the child is always top priority.

davidmatteli

Hell no! they shouldent be forced to return.

angryfapper

I think it really depends on the situation. If they just want to stay with the foster parents because they like them better, then typically, I'd go with no. But if the child is afraid of getting beat, neglected or something similar, then it should definitely account for something.

loves christmas lights

Unfortunately we do hear that returning the kids to thier natural parents is sometimes fatal. The law can only deal with adults in this instance. It really should be whats best for the child, but if the child gets to stay with the foster parents and then gets in trouble and wants to run to their natural parents to avoid the punishment, there is too much hassell to deal with this.

Danielle H

no kid should have 2 be forced to go back to parents they were obviously taken away from for a good reason.

the lord hears all my cry's

well i know what thats like i did not want to go home with my mom but i went back with her and i would much rather not be hear now with my mom but it really depends on y your in foster care in the first place if you ever want to talk just write to me

Wundt

If the child is old enough to voice an opinion, then I believe the judge and others involved in the case will take that into account when making decisions.

However, some kids may be reacting to the immediate situation, and not a long term future. I.e. I want to stay with these people because they don't spank/punish me they way Mommy/Daddy did. However, But, they don't know that the foster parents may WANT to spank them and just don't because of legal restrictions.

Kharli

I think that they shouldn't be forced to live with them but some mediation and help to get their biological family in their life is important. They can then slowly patch up the relationship if it is salvageable. Forcing them to live with them is a little cruel after these children have known to trust and love others as their parents.

general_leadguitar

yes of course its not fair for the child if his/her feelings aren't taken into account.

Shelly P. Tofu, E.M.T.

yes! Dontcha know that the woman who gave birth to the child is the ONLY one fit to raise him/her? That DNA is the ONLY important thing, and all firstmothers are angels, while all adoptive parents are devils?

okami_suta

No kids should not be forced to go back. That is just making it more hard for them. Same with cudtody battles. The kid's wishes should deffinetly be taken into account.

Opedial

Yes, especially if they are young. They may have been in care for two years of their primary years, and only know parents from weekly visits. Sometimes foster parents may also say bad things about the parents. They will work it out once they are there, and the foster parents and social worker are there to assist and make the transition easier.

If a court has declared the child to go home, then that is where they go.

monkeykitty83

No, I don't think they should ever be forced into a placement they don't want, including (but not limited to) a return to biological family.

But I also think the conversation about it should be more than "Do you want to go back to your parents?" "No."

I think the reasons the child feels that way need to be considered individually. If the child has unrealistic fears or confusion about what would happen, those can be allayed. The child will probably need to have some questions answered, and may not volunteer those questions without some in depth conversation.

I also think the discussion should happen in private. It should be without foster parents, foster siblings, or biological parents present. If possible, it should be discussed independently with the child by a therapist as well as a social worker.

I don't think a child should ever be FORCED into any kind of placement-- with biological family, foster, or adoptive-- if he/she isn't comfortable with the situation. But I also think WHY he/she isn't comfortable needs to be discussed with the child in some depth, to try to get to the bottom of the issue. Some issues can be resolved, and some can't, but there needs to at least be a real conversation about it.

mdhippie

yes i believe so
im pretty sure it work out that way and would be surprised if it didnt
doesn't the child's decision only matter???

myst1998

No, they shouldn't be forced. However, they can give them a chance... I think it really depends on why they are in foster care in the first place. In abuse cases where it was only one parent and the parents have separated then the one NOT perpetuating the abuse should be given a second chance.

If parents have won the right to have custody, there should be a period where the child is eased back... ie a series of visits with the family, overnight visits etc until the child feels comfortable. If they are adamant they don't want to go back, then they should be listened to.

High School Sophomore

I guess it really depends on the situation. There are plenty of kids out there that have been taken away from their families for no real reason at all, but social services doesn't want to hear that. Sometimes nosy and overprotective neighbors can really mess you up. They usually don't take the kid's opinion into consideration, because kids can be brainwashed or they could choose to go back to a situation which could potentially kill them, just because they love their parents no matter how bad they treat them.

Isaac K

no the parents screwed up first

lakjsd

absolutely actually I think they should only go to the biological parents if they ask in the beginning

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