Does anybody else feel like there is a disproportionate amount of make-believers on the adoption boards?
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Does anybody else feel like there is a disproportionate amount of make-believers on the adoption boards?
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I've noticed lately that there are a LOT of 15 and 16 year olds claiming to be 20-somethings who have adopted children and then give their advice 'as an AP.'
I feel like there are some very serious and very legitimate questions being asked around here on regular occasion. I also feel like it's very dangerous for anyone who has some stupid story all formed in their head to give out advice to people who are REALLY looking for help.
It's different if you're in the 'wedding' section or the 'family and relationships' section, or even if you're just asking a question. I mean, harmlessly offering wedding colors or good food or creative gift ideas for a significant other seems a lot less harmful than pretending you know all about adoption when really it's just a fantasy in your adolescent brain.
Is anybody else as bothered by these posers as I am? I don't know... even if I don't agree with certain other Adoptees, First Parents, AP's, and PAP's, they're still basing their advice and answers off of their own experiences... I seem to have a huge problem with people who just make stuff up.
Am I blowing this way out of proportion? Or is this really as big of a deal as I'm making it?
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Looney Tunes
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Hm. I think it has been really weird lately. I know that I got burned a couple times by "teens" claiming they were about to be put into foster care. After posting here and emailing with people, they disappeared, only to show up in other sections asking random "teen" things.
The problem is I don't think that "teens" can understand the seriousness of these issues, especially if they are not affected by adoption or foster care. They think it is a joke.
Worse yet is when I respond to one of them and then they send me an email that is so immature and full of hate, that I just think, what a waste of time. I have gotten several of those.
Perhaps the best we can do is try and educate these "teens" and young people about the seriousness of the issues that affect adoptees, adoptive parents, bio-parents, and foster kids/alumni. I doubt they choose to listen, but maybe one or more will be inspired to make a positive contribution.
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EDIT
If you think this is bad, go over to the Mental Health Section. People claim to be "pyschsiatrist" all the time.... People threaten to kill themselves and 13-14 year olds are like "i did it too"......Ugh. |
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medusa
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No, they shouldn't be doing it, I only answer what I know about me and my siblings adoptions. I also don't approve of adults who haven't been adopted talking about how a child will feel being raised, because some of it can be bogus. ex. oh yeah I have so and so amount of children who are adopted and they will be fine with us having a natural child. |
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Penny A (Vanessa)
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Yeah they are everywhere, in every board. Just use your discretion. |
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Gershom
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I feel like there are a couple people who make up a bunch of accounts and ask stupid questions intentionally. Then there are the random people who are out on the internet under alias's specifically to make stuff up. Neither really bother me much. They make me laugh sometimes too. |
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Randy B
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These open boards are ripe for abuse, either from those with an agenda or from those who wish to stir up crap or those who get a kick out of posing as someone else to do either of the above. I just self regulate what questions I choose to address and leave the rest to others who choose to do the same. Its like fishing. These people throw out a line and bait and wait to see who bites. I just choose not to bite. |
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Kazi
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I have noticed that, but honestly, for me, I can usually pick out the bored teens from the legits, so I just ignore them. As for advice. People usually take advice that makes the most common sense to them, so if they are spouting jibber jabber, then I would think it likely their advice would be passed over.
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unknown
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We all have different views of adoption and setting that aside, advice is needed pretty much on every aspect and facet. I myself have never adopted or given up a child for adoption, but have seen first hand the positive effects on the adoptive family and the feelings of regret by the bp. I dont pretend to be an expert, but would like to persue a career in the field. I know all of the tears I see will not be tears of joy, some will be of pain and sorrow, I am not that naive. But people posing as bp, or ap, to give advice is just plain wrong. It's like the blind leading the blind. |
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Gaia Raain
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I think this just goes along with the "children as commodities" belief system we have here in America. To the general population (i.e. those without any real connection to adoption), it IS the same as giving advice on the color of a dress. |
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