Does the father have to sign too?

noreenandjohn01

Its best for everyone involved if you name him - even if he denies paternity. Your adoption attorney will help you in terms of what you need to do in order to get his rights waived. Every state is a bit different. Perhaps the lawyer can explain that if he is saying the baby isn't his - then really why wouldn't he sign away his rights.
I saw in another post you were asking also about help with expenses during your pregnancy. That is allowable in your state but not before 90 days prior to the birth.

You don't need to deal with the birthfather - but your lawyer should. I just had a friend who adopted go through hell because after they brought the baby home a man signed the registry claiming the baby was his and wanted custody - dna proved he wasn't but it was really rough on them.

Here is a link to some state law info as well as a site for you to find an attorney. Ultimately the adoptive parents you choose will pay for the attorney so don't worry about it.

Good luck with everything!!

http://www.theadoptionguide.com/files/StateAdoptionLaws.pdf

http://www.adoptionattorneys.org/

Lori A

Ryan's mom has got it right. He has rights and if he has not signed he can go back and sue. You dont' want that for your baby. He doesn't have to talk to you if he doesn't want to. Just tell him to sign the papers, if he refuses list him as the father. Which I think you should do anyway. Not for you or him, but for your baby. One day that child is going to want a copy of his/ her original birth certificate and it will be better all around if his name is on it. There may be medical conditions that come up later in life and he may need to be found. My dad was not a diabetic when I relinquished my daughter.

Since you have made your decision to relinquish have you talked to his parents about adopting the child?

Ryan's mom

YES. He HAS to sign. Tell him by signing the adoption papers that he is no longer required to take a DNA test or to support the baby. If he decides later on to be involved in his child's life and he has not signed the papers he can sue the adoptive parents stating that he did not know that the baby was put up for adoption.

Heather B

Paternity may matter to your child. Dishonesty is not the way to go.

A legal notice will be put out as part of the adoption process for the father to come forward and if you have lied, he will be able to prevent the adoption

Honesty is always the best policy

Lovemykids

I believe that the father does have to sign the baby over as well.

snowwillow20

Please don't say that you don't know who the father is. Put his name on the bc and make him sign away his rights if you want to give up your child. Please think long and hard before you give your baby up. It's a decision that you will have to live with until you reunite if you are lucky enough to reunite. You will live your life wondering how your baby is and if she hates you. Please get some counseling before you do this, and talk to other birth moms about how they feel about losing their babies to adoption. You are only 17 weeks, wait until you give birth to make the decision.

Sean G

Look at this web site
http://www.childadoptionlaws.com/child_adoption_laws/adoption_laws_tennessee.htm
The father may have to sign saying he gives up his rights as a father. It differs by state when you are pregnant and he doesn't want to be involved. Look into it.

BPD Wife

You need to have the father's involvement here. Please do not just omit his name from the records. You are denying the child a huge bit of information that they may someday want or need. Also, adoption is a legal proceeding. If you choose to make an adoption plan for your child, you don't want to see the adoption fail because you haven't disclosed the correct information about the bio father.

Good luck to you whatever you choose.

hazel

you should make him get a test it's jail or the test he really has to take it but for no live with your parents or cuzenzs anyone you know that will support you.

lighting goddess

my best friend (we live in tennessee as well) gave up a little girl in a private open adoption in 2003...

she genuinely didn't know the father (one night stand) and it wasn't a huge issue...i don't think you will have too much to worry about...unless he plans to swoop in at the last minute wanting to keep the baby...

when you find a family they will have an adoption attorney that will help you out with all of this...

if you need help finding a family my friend is still in touch with the couple who adopted her daughter and they may know friends who are also trying to adopt.

feel free to email me...

kelly e

I don't know about the signing over rights thing, my friend about 22 years ago gave up her son, I don't think the father had to sign rights over but that has been along time ago. I think you are a very responsible young lady, you want your baby to go to a great home with a mom and dad, and you said you can't give that to it right now, you are thinking of your child that is great, at least your giving that baby a chance to be born and making someone else extremely happy...We have 4 kids, 3 are more or less grown, and we have been trying for another little one for over a year now, found out my tubes are plugged, so we have been talking about adopting...Just don't make a overnight decision it takes time for something as big as this...Good luck, Your in my prayers. If you need to talk email me kelbyreddog@yahoo.com

Sara L

im not sure in this 1 but i just want u to think abt giving the baby 4 adoption. wen he or she grows up think abt how they would feel like knoing that their parent didnt want them.more better how would u feel if ur OWN parents gave u off for adoption.....

storm_goddess23

If he is denying the baby is his, I dont think u have to worry about him. But I could be wrong.

inzbrkqt

He either has to sign over his rights, or they must be terminated.

Once he signs as the dad, and if you decide not to give your child to another family, and you keep child, then need state aid, they will go after him for support, even if you do not.

if you adopt out the baby, and he has not officially signed over rights, he can show up down the road and demand HIS child...and he could very well win.

Make sure all your T's are crossed and i's are dotted. these things do have a way to come back around if done 'not exactly right according to law.'

Unless you were raped, or a victim of incest, it is pretty much known you have to know at least who among how many guys 'could' be the dad. And they will all be tested to find out before adoption, UNLESS a dad just admits paternity then signs over rights.

colder_in_minnesota

If he doesn't acknowledge paternity, he doesn't have a say. If he's not talking to you, it's unlikely that he'd do so.

Linsey

He absolutely DOES NOT have to sign! The state will have no way of knowing who the father is unless you put him on the birth certificate! When you have the baby they will ask you if the father is present or if you know where he is and all you have to say is no. I had a good friend give her baby up for adoption and that is what she did. The father said it wasn't his, and disappeared out of the picture. I think it is a very brave thing you are doing! I am in the process of trying to adopt right now, and it is very difficult. Good luck to you and God bless!

GEE-GEE

If you "dont know who the father is" how can you have anyone sign papers. That may be the best way to go but.... if he ever comes back and says that he wants custody etc. You may have legal problems later. The best thing to do is to ask him to sign away his rights just to be on the safe side. If he puts up a fight and say the baby is not his, then tell him, he is not missing out on anything by signing away his rights.

I would go through an agency if I were you. I am on a waiting list at an agency and they do a lot of work like background checks, financial research, physicals, homestudies, etc. They do all the work to make sure the family you pick is actually ready, and capable of adopting, and they make sure that the home is a good one etc.

blondie

if they even ask, just say you dont know who it is. he is denying it anyways...

mississippi08

im not very positive, but i think that he doesnt have to be there because he is denying it, but if they need him they will send papers for him to be aware and he has a certain amount of time to follow up and they will go ahead on with the adoption. R u giving to state or family
mother of 3 and interested

Trillian

If he's denying paternity, then he wouldn't want involvement anyway. I don't believe the father has to sign either way, but if he does just tell them you don't know. If he ever asks what happened, tell him you gave it up and why should he care since he doesn't even think it's his?

Honestly, I don't think he has to sign anything anyway, so I doubt it would come up. Get in touch with an adoption agency, they're hungry for moms and they'll tell you everything you need to know.

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