Doesn’t this undermine the authority of the foster parents?
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Doesn’t this undermine the authority of the foster parents?
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When we were foster parents one of the rules were that if you ground your foster children you can’t do it for more than 1 week without approval from their worker. So your foster child sneaks out to a party you said they could not go to and you catch them on a Saturday you can’ t ground them for more than a week. That means by Sunday they can go out again. To me as a parent sneaking out is at least a two week if not three week offense with restrictions after that such as earlier curfew until I can trust them again after that. If I can do this for my biological children why not foster.
The rule does not say you can’t go more than a week you just have to ask permission. I think punishment needs to be clear and immediate not, Okay I caught you doing X let me get back to you on how long you will be grounded till I hear from your worker.
Additional Details
Very good points so far. Thanks for the perspective. We never did teens but think we will after our children are older.
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Randy B
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Foster parents have no authority other then what the Department gives us. By that I mean if a Department says that the kids can't be grounded for more then a week then they can't be grounded for more then a week BUT I put to you that it is a calendar week from the time the grounding starts, not something that is automatically over as of Saturday night.
Regardless, the foster parents have what ever authority they are given. With our first child two years ago we could get their standard inoculations done but with this last one we can't unless we get permission from the Department. So be it. |
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skylark
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In training we were taught that we as foster parents were part of a professional team. The worker is involved as long as the child is in foster care. I'm sure the workers have seen it all in terms of difficult behavior. They might even have some good advice!
I think it would be possible to find some consequences that were within the rules. A week of grounding and some other restrictions for example. They didn't want to see kids on house arrest for weeks at a time. |
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Tarra
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That's so the foster parents don't go all whacko and ground someone for like months and months thinking that'll solve the problem. (or rather ignore it). Cause that's happened too.
for what it's worth, I think you need to redefine what Grounding means. It's not just not going out. Grounding (too me) means -- in your room, Alone, no phone (or cell), no computer, no TV. You have books and a radio and you CAN NOT leave your room unless you need to use the bathroom. That's it! That's grounding!! Anything less is just inconvenient. It's not a punishment.
But I like Annabells answer most. |
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