Experience with surrogacy?

My friend and her husband are unable to have children and have been trying to adopt, only to have their hearts broken countless times when the mother decides to keep her baby. I have two healthy children and my husband and I do not wish to have any more children ourselves, but I am considering offering to be a surrogate. Please share your experience, either as a surrogate mother or the parent of a child born out of surrogacy.
Additional Details
I should add that my friend herself is adopted. She fully understands the process and respects the feelings of the mother completely. However, after many months of preparation (they were required to have a nursery all set up, a car seat, and all the basic baby care necessities ready to go) and anticipation, yes it was understandably "heartbreaking" for her.

Annabelle

One word of advice, If she hasnt asked you to be a surrogate tread lightly. Seems like the ultimate sacrifice right? But actually you may offend her.

cantstopLinnyG

I would think as much as they want to be parents, they would rejoice in the fact these young women decided to do the right thing for themselves and their baby. There is nothing more "heartbreaking" than losing your child. Thank God those women did not.
Surrogate children face the same emotional scars adoptees do. It will also affect you. It seems all nice and awesome for you to do this for your friend, but the emotional pain will last a lifetime.

http://sonofasurrogate.tripod.com/

Corn is not dog food! No wheat!

I honestly don't get the concept of "bonding inside the womb".

Hello!!!

How much do you remember about your trip through the birth canal?
You're first breath?
You're first poop?

NO!!!

Baby brains aren't CAPABLE of those memories.
So, if they don't remember birth, how do they remember what their womb was like? How do they know heartbeats? How do they know smells? Taste? That's a joke, right?

Say they did "bond in the womb".
OK
How long do you think a baby's memory is?

THEY'VE DONE STUDIES that show an infant can only remember a few minutes at a time.

Just how, exactly, does the child "remember" this "womb bonding"?

It makes no sense.

As for the kid, I think it's all in the presentation.
You present it as a good thing, the kid will see it as a good thing.

No one's buying a child.
No one's manipulating poor people.

Please, people, get lives.

Sorry, got on a little rant there...LOL!
To answer your question...
If you're able to go through a pregnancy and fork over the kid, well, go for it.
Remember, pregnancy is always a risk. You could have complications that effects your family in the negative.

butterfly

i think this would be an amazing thing to do for someone, as it would be there child(dna) and your just sort of looking after it for them for a while. good on you x

icehockeymom7

Your friend and her husband could also consider international adoption. There are many children in the world in orphanages who need adoptive parents. That would be another route to consider rather than surrogacy. I think there are some websites about surrogacy where you could actually talk to other mothers who have done this.

anotheronebitesadust2005

I think that would be the best idea to ask your friend about how she would feel about your idea. I am one of the people who were put on this earth and want a baby so badly, but me and my husband an't been able to have kids. I don't think some people out in this world deserve to be able to have kids,But of course they are always able to have kids of there own. But when you are able to get pregnant and have a baby of your own,your are lucky and i think it is rewarding to make someone else's dream of parenting a baby come true. These people on here who think it an't right, they are just selfish and don't give a damn what anyonwe else may want! I always say that someone who can have childern of their own , have no clue how us ladys fill that long to have even one baby to full fill their dreams with even that one chid. Nobody knows how we fill! I think you need to go to your friend and tell her your plan, and proceed from there with how she feels about it.

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