First Parents, How do you know you made the right decision?

mia's mum

i asked a similar question on here just yesterday, and truthfully, now i really don't know. im starting to get VERY confused. it has only been recently that ive started second guessing my decision. at the time i was very messed up, had a lot of problems and was homeless. but i know that no one could have loved her like i could have. BUT at the same time, that love wasn't going to feed her, put a roof over her head and keep her safe. now im always worried about her and hoping and praying she's safe.
i guess ill never know if i made the right decision, hopefully one day she will look for me and i wil find out.
till then, who knows.

Penny A (Vanessa)

You never really do. It was right in a lot of ways, but wrong in many others too.

Andraya

I didn't. I made the wrong one and I will deal with the trauma and aftermath for the rest of my life.

Ghost Writer Rides Again

Simple.

I don't.

She's almost 16 mo old and the regret is rushing in like a tidal wave.

Her adopters have slammed the door in my face completely, they will never acknowledge that my older daughter is her sister (no piece of legal paper will change that), never see me as her mother, and she will now never know of our existence until she is an adult, if they even bother to tell her.

Did I make the right decision?

I don't know. Probably not.

magic pointe shoes

I don't. I know what my life was like after his birth and I know what my life was like for the seven years between his birth and the birth of our next child... but I just don't know what it would have been like had we chose to parent instead of relinquish.

I do know this though. We are good people and our children that were not relinquished are being raised in a stable loving home that is much different than our own rough and difficult childhoods.

I lean towards thinking that I did not make the right decision.

tammmy s

I don't know. I am also considering placing for adoption, and it seems like alot of mothers regret it. But iot also seems like the ones who do regret it really wanted to be mothers and gave the baby up for financial reasons because maybe the didn't realise welfare pays for section 8 and food stamps and TANF and medicaid and chip insurance and childcare and prety much everything. I realise that govt pays for everything but I'm questioning the emotional stability of the homelife. Alot of mothers regret not seeing the child grow up. Whats more improtant, that I saw him grow up or that he did so in a loving, stable environment. However, you cannot guarantee that the rich people who adopt your child are any more emotionally sound than you. Also I am scared of the father. And my parents stupidity. I know they wont hurt the child, but I see tham do an awefully lot of dumb things. They are never out of debt, can't keep a job, can't clean the house, have no friends. Once they sold all my furniture after they told me I didn't have to leave it in storage, they would watch it. They said they had no money for food. I asked why they didn't get food stamps. They said they didn't know how. How all the illeterate people in the streets on drugs know how to get food stamps and my parents can't even figure out who to ask. I just know that they are about my only help and it scares me.

snowwillow20

I'll have to agree with Penny, is some ways is was right at the time, but in some ways is so so wrong. Giving her up, messed up so many lives and even though she has a loving amom, her life has been hard.

Dreamweaver ILF posse 2009

You never KNOW for sure...until you are reunited and hear all was ok. but the choice was right FOR ME and I think for him. I could not raise him. No one told me this. No one badgered me, counseled me, pushed me, paid me..etc. I decided on my own to give him up long before I told anyone but my boyfriend. I felt and still do, that it was/is the right decision in my situation.

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