First/"birth"parent suicide statistics?

Possum

I found this piece of research -

"In response to items concerning depression, 51% of the respondents reported experiencing severe depression since the relinquishment, with 97% reporting some degree of depression (mild, moderate, or severe). Over half .. reported experiencing depression often since the relinquishment. 63% have had thoughts about killing themselves.ï¿½ (Kelly, 1999)"

http://home.att.net/~judy.kelly/SResults.htm

(be aware the details outlined in that link may be extremely triggering for those that have lost children to adoption)

Another quote from the study:

"Relinquishment and Traumatic Stress Symptoms. The birthmothers in this study overwhelmingly described their experience of relinquishment as traumatic. Responding to the statement "Relinquishing my child was a traumatic experience," 89% answered that this statement was "Extremely true;" 96% of the respondents answered either "Extremely true" or "Very true." The three positive responses combined ("extremely/very/somewhat true") accounted for 99% of the responses."

Seriously - I can't understand why some people want to keep their minds completely closed to this stuff.

Saying that relinquishing a child is merely -
".....very emotional, personal, exhausting......."
- really has absolutely NO grasp of what women go through when that baby is taken away from them - and given to another. (and it's not something that is only said by just one person here - as WAY too many think that this is really not such a hard thing for these women to go through)

And trying to say that many are low income - I say pppppfffftttt.
Studies show that the majority of women that relinquish at birth - or soon after - are from middle class white America - not the poor.
(I am not talking about those taken by CPS - that is not 'infant adoption' - that is adoption through foster care)

This study was taken with women that believed the 'your baby will have a better life - and you will get over all this and barely remember it' story.
You know - the bull story that many young, single, caught-in-a-bind women are told even to this day - when they're faced with an unexpected pregnancy - and not sure what to do.

Oh - but you all just go on and believe the sunshine and rainbow versions - because really - you just want another baybeeeee for your own - so who cares how the birfmother really feels.
It's all about you.

(disclaimer - above comment NOT targeted at those that do actually get this stuff - and are in adoption for the best interests of the child - instead of those just trying to split mother from child so that they can call that child their own - trolling for expectant mothers to relinquish would be a fine example of who this message is for.....)

sunny

My mother tried to commit suicide after I was placed in the early 60's. Her parents put her in a mental hospital. She was angry that she hadn't succeeded.

Many of the patients there were smoking cigarettes. She picked up the habit to shove down the depression. When her mother asked her why she smoked (no one in her family did) she explained that it was a "slow suicide".

She is in her 60s, and has emphysema and chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. She uses oxygen all the time, and now has a 5 yr. life expectancy.

So she wouldn't appear in your statistics, because the suicide was SLOW.

I'm sure there are many more women like her.

snowwillow20

That's interesting, I never wanted to kill myself, but i thought about drinking myself into a stupor a few times and I have always used food to self medicate. We all handle our problems differently. I'm so sorry for your friend.

jessica300

"Just as the peak suicide rate in Australian women coincided with the peak adoption period, suicide and attempted suicide is not uncommon amongst mothers who are part of the new open adoption practice." http://www.angelfire.com/or/originsnsw/openadoption.html

"Female suicide rates in Australia have remained relatively constant since 1900, except for a gradual increase through the 1950s and 1960s, when the rate doubled. By 1985 the rate had declined to previous levels. (Hassan 1995). This peak in the female suicide rate in Australia coincides with the peak rate of adoptions."
http://www.angelfire.com/or/originsnsw/wendys_pres.html

Also, some discussion here about the lack of statistics on adoption and suicide. http://www.aph.gov.au/hansard/senate/commttee/S8572.pdf

Lillie

Add the mother of Hugh Jackman and his wack-job wife's adopted child to the list.

Freckle Face

Hi MamaKate,

so far i only found this. I'll keep looking, tho

http://www.angelfire.com/or/originsnsw/wendys_pres.html

http://www.birthmothers.info/headlines/domestic_adoption.html

http://bjsw.oxfordjournals.org/cgi/content/abstract/26/5/609

http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=11454&cn=11

http://www.adoptioncrossroads.org/ginni.html#birthmother

Lori A

I think I am one of those statistics. I did try suicide but obviously failed. I like Sunny' s mom was locked up. Picked up some bad habits and have been slowly killing myself for a long time now. I drank to numb the pain. I wanted the memories to stop popping into my head. I have stopped drinking but still smoke, and now use food as my weapon of choice. My point is, first mothers go through a lot, be it fast or slow.

red&sassy

What mother wouldn't want to kill herself after the loss of her baby? Weather it is quick (overdose) or slow (drugs, smoking, overeating or drinking), it's all the same. I remember thinking that as soon as I had my baby and gave her up, I was going to kill myself. That was my plan. I guess some would say that was my so called "adoption plan."

The one and only thing that has changed AND saved my life, is my son. I've never thought about it since.

Heather Leigh

I don't know about stats, but my sons original father committed suicide last year. But, he was facing more criminal charges due to abuse towards my son and also identity theft. He was using my sons name and ss # to get credit cards.

Turtle Isle

I dont know but a friend of mine went psychitzophreniic, when her dad made her give her son up

Doodlestuff

The link isn't there any more but studies done during the 90s indicate that the suicide rate is more than 20% that of the average population. It is higher yet if they included those who have a family history of depression, but may not have been exhibiting depression at the time of relinquishment (according to Social Worker report, which we know can be junk). The particular article I had been reading that had the link was from the American Journal of Psychiatry, but most of the stuff from the 90s doesn't appear to be online any longer.

US suicide rate 1994: 12 in 100,000

onactfuo

After I had my first baby and placed her, I took a whole box of benadryl. I know that sounds stupid, but I couldn't sleep. Every time I put my head on my pillow I thought about her. Thankfully, no one ever knew that overdosed that night. It was one of the scariest things in the world. Later that week I contacted the adoption agency who did all the paperwork and they were concerned b/c of my crying and told me that if I needed any psychological treatment, they would front the bill (that never happened). When I was going through the pregnancy, no one ever counseled me for the after effects of the adoption. Agencies are out to make money and get the adoptive parents what they want, a lot of them really don't care for the birth mothers!

That is just my opinion!

sizesmith

This would be a hard thing to calculate, especially for the reasons that first parents relinquish. For instance, persons who are in poverty have a higher rate. Women who give birth suffer from post partem blues (whether they relinquish or not), and the chemical changes can cause suicide.
Women who relinquish often have done so because of physical abuse, and the trauma from that both mental and physical can lead to suicide. I truly realize that relinquishing is a very emotional, personal, exhausting, and last point resort, but I am sure that there are many other reasons that lead up to that point in addition to placing a child for adoption.

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