For an adopted child, how does finding your biological family impact on your life?

punky

My sister and I were both adopted. I was a few months old and my sister was 2 yrs old. We met our biological parents and other siblings when I was 18 yrs.old. For myself although it was great to meet them and to know I had many brothers and sisters ( I was one of 10 kids) this did not change my life drastically. I was kinda awed by it for awhile but when I had my first child I could not imagine giving up him at all. I don't blame my "parents" for giving me up because I definitely had a better life because of it I still wonder why sometimes. My biological Mother is still living and 9 kids but she can not answer that neither can my older brothers. I am grateful that I was raised by the people I was raised by because I am who I am because of them. They are definitely the best parents I could ask for.

Monty Montezuma

I will try and get my children to answer this too. My children were adopted by my husband & I when they were 5 & 8 (now 17 & 20). They had full knowledge of their birth/ biological family and clear memories of their earlier childhood, therefore they were not really 'lost' in the first place.
They had always had the opportunity to have face to face and letter contact with their birth family, which they used from time to time, but eventually their birth mum moved with no forwarding address and that option is closed to them.
We have photo albums in the house, letters, cards, a tape recording by a great grandmother. My children have a very clear understanding of who they are and where they come from as a result of information we have been able to provide and questions they themselves have had opportunity to ask - as their own memories are reasonably clear, particularly my daughter's, there has been no 'rose-tinted' spectacles looking back and they seem to have blossomed as a result.
They may wish to try and trace their birth family again in the future, if so, they will have their reasons and that's fine by us.

magic pointe shoes

I think your topic is too broad. What you are asking is basically the equivalent of why the ocean is the way it is. The answers you will receive to this question will be so oversimplified, it would be useless research.

anastasia beaverhausen-the real1

closure.

rachael

i have to agree with 'magic' above. very broad and vague spectrum.

i can tell you i was complete when i found her, but what does that do you? i can say so many things made sense. but like what?

can you narrow the window slightly? i could write you a book, but it would take forever.

Heather B

It's affected my life for the better. I was tired of being a floating voter; I just wanted to feel plugged in somewhere, to know about a place where, if all had gone well, I truly belonged. Now I do and I couldn't be happier about knowing the whole truth about the beginnings of my life.

I'm also tracing my genetic heritage for the very first time, seeing photographs of ancestors and reading about their lives - I find that so fascinating and grounding. Other people take these things for granted and cannot fathom how huge healing severed genetic roots really is.

You could only ever really understand if you'd grown up totally in the dark as to who you are and where you came from. Rootless and disconnnected. Then the discovery of 'your people' - wow, it's just amazing. Amazing.

mrs. derek jeter

i have not yet found my biological parents. i have some information on them but dont know what they look like or anything. since i am born in croatia and my biological family is in croatia, i cannot find them through the internet. i could ask my adoptive parents about them but it is a tough thing for me to talk about and i dont think they even know that much about my birth parents. it is so hard not knowing who ur family is or what they look like and if u resemble them or not. i know that if i ever do find them, it will be one of the happiest moments of my life. i think it will feel like a million pounds was lifted off of my shoulders. i wont have to worry or stress anymore and i will be able to look at myself in the mirror and know that i take after my mother or my father. i hope this helps u with ur project.

Rowan

Well, i was adopted as a baby. The day i found out who my biological parents were, was the worst of my life. I was raised, believing they were my aunt and uncle. Now, i had known since i was 7 that i was adopted, and i found out later that mine and my twin brother were adopted by my biological aunt. I was 13 when i found this out. It was nice to finally know who i came from, but a whole new set of fears set in. My BPs are both alcoholics, and that means i have a higher chance of developing the same tendency for it. Then, i felt...closure of a sense. I felt that now, with that solved, i could put it behind me and go out. Since i was 7 i had wondered who they were, and i finally knew. That was enough. Like i've said before, i'm relieved i wasn't raised by my BPs.

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