For those birth mothers whom were tricked into...?

LaurieDB

LittleJaina's response is one of the most narrow, thoughtless, condemning, cruel and heartless responses I've heard on Y!A to date. She has absolutely no experience being in the position many of these mothers experienced.

Although I'm not a first parent, I know PLENTY who were in the very position about which Dave is asking. The pain has never ended. Anyone who could watch this without compassion needs therapy.

eta:
I'm sorry, Dave, that certain people ("small j") are just self-righteous, condescending, judgmental, cold-hearted, inconsiderate people without class. People like that need to butt out. It's not right that you should have to deal with people like that when you're dealing with such a difficult situation.

eta:
I noticed the other "caring" individual who decided to grace you with her opinion had the gall to say "God Bless" after insulting you. Wow. The compassion of these folks just blows me away.

Lori A

My case was different. I was handed all the same crap the other bio moms were but it didn't matter to me. I had made up my mind to relenquish for my own reasons and I was going through with it for my own reasons.

I did not believe them when the told me I would go home and forget about it all. I never thought I would forget and in fact i didn't.

As far coping, that was much more difficult than I thought it was going to be. The agency told me all about the wonderful people who were going to raise my baby. After the ink was dry I started hearing all the horror stories associated with adoption. I felt sick to my stomach for years afterward. I literally had to push the thoughts from my mind at times when it was inappropriate to greive. I couldn't allow myself to think about it. Not an easy task when there are babies in your face everywhere and that is what usually triggered the whole thing to begin with.

What would I say to them? Thank You, Bless You, for being the parents I was told she would get. She got great parents, and I hope some day I get the chance to tell them to their face. Words can not express the emense relief I feel inside to know that she was more than adequately taken care of. My plan to keep her safe and be raised in a loving happy home actually worked and it is all because of them.

Heather B

People don't want to believe that this happens. I've emailed you a link to something I think you will find very interesting and comforting for your wife - she is not alone, you will see

For what it's worth, I know how vulnerable it can feel having just given birth - people can be so harsh here and I'm sorry

Livvie

sorry, I never did sign over my rights.... by God's grace. But when I was in labor with my son (and I was 16) my mother-in-law tried to get me to sign some papers giving up my rights. but said it was for my medical care. Well luckly my mom always taught me to read and being under a epadurial and active later I wasn't reading anything at that time.

Well later I found out what it really was. And after a few other attemts I left. And ran home to Co..

but it does happen people can be crazy

snowwillow20

I wasn't tricked. I made a decision even though I was ill informed to give up my child. I grieved for 30 years, I grieved so much that it made me a sick emotional wreck. I didn't cope very well for a lot of those years. What saved me was reunion and counseling. You never forget and you never get over it. Oh you might push it so far back that it becomes a dream, but it's real.

Lizzilikens

How did you get tricked into signing adoption papers?

^^Dont letcture her, you have know idea what she has been through, you dont know the circamstances.

???now what???

I am so sorry for your pain.

I was lied to, and I wouldn't have anything to say to them. One day she will know the truth, that she had been lied to. It makes my heart ache knowing this. I can only hope that she will meet her brother, Sam, and he will know all. He knows exactly where in Virginia she is and one day he will be there for her. He will find her, and I hope they will be great friends. That is my dream for them both.

Your C

i made the slideshow over at my profile -

myspace.com/atinobalsial

that's my son, who was adopted by people who refuse to acknowledge me, playing "What Went Wrong"

[[carly]]

im not familiar with this.

i dont even know what id say.
i wouldnt have gone down without a fight.
absolutely NO ONE will take my baby and live to tell the story.
i get mad thinking about it.

did this happen to you??
if so, im so sorry.

Old Fashioned Mother

I'm sorry, but I absolutely fail to see how a mother could possibly be 'tricked' or talked into giving up her child.
There is absolutely nothing in this world that could make me give up my child. Nothing at all. I firmly believe that anyone who says this has regrets later and is finding some way of justifying their decision to themselves. Which I can understand, it must be so traumatic to know you gave your child up. But that doesn't mean you should lie about it.

Your edit makes no sense. If your baby was taken by the proper chanels then there was a necessity for it. Didn't you say at the end you could have the baby back?
I don't believe that ANYBODY, especially not a mother trying to get her baby back mistakes adoption papers for a standard health form.
I think there is obviously more to this story than meets the eye.
I stand by my original answer.

God bless.

ETA: So this isn't even you, it's someone you know now who is telling you what happened 17 years ago?
I definitely stand by my original answer.

misty mcfalls

sorry can't spell that good i was 16 yrs old when my mother told me the state was going to take my kids and being a stupid teenager i beveled here when she told me that if i let her adopted my two boys i will get them back and don't listen to the judge they don't tell you every thing so when you tern 18 yrs old i will let you adopted them back well when i tern 18 and asked her that i wanted my kids back she told me she was never going to give them back and she never planed to i am 32 yrs old now and i have not got to see my kids she did every thing to keep me a way from them i thot one thing in the world how wold keep me safe and wold not lie to me wold be my mom to any teenager don't be stupid like i was you will regret it every day of your life to this day i am still fighting for them . and one thing i all so learn was if you cant trust your own mother who can you trust and to any one yes this is a true story you can call me stupid or any name in the book i don't care any more what people think .

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