Have you ever sent a "negative" e-mail to a member here?

Lori A

HUMM. I wonder if what I have sent would be considered negative. Mostly I send people nice emails, but have had some back and forth discussions with people. The last one accused me of stalking her. Odd since it took 3 nasty emails from her to get me to even respond. She finally went away.

Looney Tunes

I have gotten lots.

I got one that I posted here that REALLY hurt me. It basically said that I deserved everything I got and maybe I should work on trying to get right with GOD so I don't burn in hell. Ouch. I posted about it on this board and someone reported me for the question.
(I guess some people think that a little kid deserves to be hurt so badly that the person who did it served almost 20 years in prison and is a registered offender for life.. I guess I deserved that.)

Y/A did nothing. They have never responded to me favorably.

I sent one and it was not negative. It was to a person who bad-mouthed foster kids. I told the person that I was sorry they thought that way, because it was really VERY uncompassionate.

Just a Mom

I don't send negative emails, but I do get them. Mostly about adopting "damaged urchins" or about people hating gay adoption. I do report them, and the one time I mentioned who sent me one of the emails, my question got deleted and there was like two weeks when everything I wrote got deleted.

ETA: Well, I guess that I did respond in unfriendly ways to one crazy girl who accused me of adopting the damaged urchins. Alas, she has blocked me. What a loss.

Laurel J

I don't get it either. I've never sent anyone here an initial email. I do sometimes answer the ones I'm sent. Sometimes I delete them.

I didn't realize I could report folks for emails, but I never got one I think took things to that level anyway.

Mom to Foster Children

I get them and I get them alot. Mostly it has to do from the adoption forum - either on my views on adoption (which are pretty much open minded) or some people just don't like my name and have insisted that I change it! Needless to say I have never changed it...

magic pointe shoes

I have. Usually it is spurned by someone thinking I'm a breeder cow needing to unload my baby. =oP I don't take those kind of answers or private messages very kindly.

aloha.girl59

I have mostly received nice emails from people here. I can think of one negative one, from a total psycho, and I laughed when I read it. The author is seriously deluded about adoption and only posts here to stir up trouble. She seems to enjoy getting thumbs down. Whatever. I've learned a lot here and I answer questions hoping to help others learn what I have. If one crazy chick doesn't like it, that's HER problem.

Not Adopted

Haven't sent one.

Haven't received one (yet).

Sly

No, I have never sent one, except in reply to one, I got a series of them from one person on here, and stupid me, I tried to explain my meaning, assuming that I was dealing with a reasonable person. My BAD! She was not a reasonable anything, most especially a person! After her last particularly gut wrenching email she blocked me so I stood in frustrated rage unable to respond. Then I realized how stupid it was to waste my time with her and now I don't see her any longer. I am pretty sure she is still here, under a different guise.

I try to not let the things that are said here bother me, but sometimes they do. This is a sensitive subject for a lot of us. Humor helps sometimes, so I am sometimes sarcastic as a defense, I guess. I try to be respectful and polite and to not speak universally. I also try to be positive in personal emails. I get really nice ones. I love those. They make my day!

Sandy Young,
Interesting question

ETA: Botz, well done! Just wait, I bet you will have a lot more! LOL I was so shocked and horrified the first time one of my answers was deleted. but it is soooooo sweeeeet when one is reinstated! That happened recently to me.

Theresa

Received -- yes, although not for a very long time.

Sent -- no.

cruzgirlz3

Yes, I have received and sent. But I have to say that those conversations, though they have been heated at times, were pretty enlightening and they were better handled off line. I actually really appreciate it when someone is upset, rather than post for all to see, that they come directly to me. Most all the time, I come out with a better understanding of the person even if I don't agree with them. I don't mind getting e-mails at all. If someone is out of line or stalking me (which happened once in the politics section) I just ignore or report them. I like talking to people through email, you get a MUCH better sense of who they are IRL.

julie j

Hi Sunny,

Not me either. I have never sent nor received any e-mail through Y!A. I don't know why somebody would say that.

julie j
reunited adoptee

Heather B

No, but I've received plenty nasty messages :(

I use the delete button liberally.

ETA Somebody's pants are on fire !

I don't, but I get them all the time. I really don't think my negative e-mail I receive is warranted nor any blocking. While they may not like my answer doesn't mean they should freak out about it. I don't like other answers on here either, but I never say anything. I don't care enough. If they want to freak out me, so be it. I don't spam, I don't swear, I am not vulgar or insulting...I'm just brutally honest, which really isn't a good enough reason.

My favorites are getting negative e-mail and then they have their e-mail blocked...it's cowardly that they can say something, but others aren't allowed to respond.

snowwillow20

No that would be mean and I am a nice person.

I haven't received a mean one either.

Just because I don't agree with someone does not give me the right to push my views on them and badger them until they agree with me. They in turn should not do that to me either.

anastasia beaverhausen-the real1

yup.

but not more than one to a single person. and not very often. only when someone is completely outragous.

myst1998

Don't think so... have sent emails in response to others but they were only positive ones to date. Don't really use the email function much here as I have other email addresses to check which frankly are more important as they are to do with my everyday life and nothing to do with adoption. Yes. LOL, I DO have a life outside of adoption! Thank goodness. Oh, but yes, I have received them.

Haven_Summers

Ive never sent any out but Ive recived a couple, they just arnt worth my time dwelling on them.

PhilM

Yes, I have. Some have been attempts to keep disagreements between two people off the board. Some have been responses to negative e-mails I received first.

I will say I received two last night from the person who complained about it yesterday. He sent the first of them before I had sent him any e-mails, so I find it amusing that he continues to lie on here when there is evidence proving that he's lying.

Kazi

Never sent one. Have received a couple.

My reaction (if any) is usually to use humour. Nothing irks whackjobs more than knowing that they've had no affect other than to make me and my husband laugh.

I've never reported them though. Why bother. I'm a big girl; I don't need the principal to stand up for me.

Jennifer L

Haven't sent one. Haven't received one.

ETA: Wow, 3 Thumbs down? I'm sorry, who should I send a negative email to?

Randy B

Well, since it was me I will state that, as of about 3 minutes ago I did send one and I may have sent one or two in the past that were a little..."terse" but they were in response to ones I had received initially.

As to those of yesterday, I can now state that the number is 18 and I do have them still. Not that I "collect" that stuff but I just haven't bothered to empty the trash which is where they go straight to anyway.

My "reporting" of it here was as an aside to another comment I was making and was not meant to be a complaint, just a comment. I guess that it may have been inappropriate to mention it in my answer and if anyone is offended I apologize. I've heard much worse then that mentioned here though but I guess that is no reason to "join in".

As for reporting such things to YA, they don't care. The reply that I received was that anything through email was a private matter between the sender and receiver and since it was not posted publicly it was not anything they were concerned with. Fair enough. If I didn't want messages of either sort I would turn off my email availability but I don't want to do that. I guess that's why God had Microsoft invent the trash bin (after stealing the idea from Apple).

BPD Wife

I actually have been off the Y!A adoption area because of the nasty emails that I have received in the past. It just got overwhelming after awhile. Sometimes people just wrote nasty stuff to be "nasty". I appreciate when people try to have an open dialogue about an issue that we disagree on, and sometimes it may get heated, but when people are downright nasty, it's out of line.

Honestly though, I'm sure that emails I have sent to others in response to a personal attack or in defense of an answer may have been perceived as "nasty". I try to give people the benefit of the doubt when I can, but there for awhile there were a few people who were just on a bitter streak to attack people. I do report them when it happens, but everyone knows how that doesn't work anymore either. : )

Rowan

received, yes.
Sent-yes, but only in response to something sent to me. But it was not anyone currently on this forum. And i wouldn't really call what i wrote negative. More almong the lines of "WTF"

rachael

i had a few, but in the end, once we actually listened to each other, we were able to learn a little from one another. crazychix and i had a few words not too long ago. but when we took the time to listen-we were able to work out our issues with one another.

i usually dont report because this forum was built on the idea that we could come together and learn from one another. unless it is an extreme case, then we should make an effort to do that.

IDK!!

About a dozen or so, 10 from our good ol' dallas dweller and 2 from some one (probably the same person previously mentioned) outraged that I, (an amom) would support allison quets.

I've had others in other sections, but I deserved those, I was instigating

LaraSue

I haven't, but I have received some.. And I beg to differ with you Sunny, because you are one of the ones who sent me one.

Rainia W

I have never done that lol, I like to keep my negative comments on the boards. I prefer not to have negative comments, but anyone who has ready my answers know that isn't the case half the time lol.

Independ"ant"

Nope.

I wouldn't waste my time however when someone sends me an email, I do not sugarcoat my responses (negative, positive or neutral).

Some people like to exaggerate for affirmation, it comforts their denial.

Sophie

I've sent emails, but it's up to the receiver to say if it was "negative" or not. I've also gotten many of what I consider to be "negative".

What I think is funny is those who spew haterd in the public form here, have their personal emails closed. CHICKENS.

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