How can I go about meeting my birth parents?

Heather B

My Mom didn't register with the State either; because she didn't know she could. She'd been sent away so many times over the years that she thought it was hopeless trying to find me. Then they brought in the State registry and she knew nothing about it. Just because people aren't registered doesn't mean they don't want to be found! Don't give up

Join Indiana Open
http://www.indianaopen.org/

ETA: Lots of people will try to put you off searching with the 'what if . . . ' blah blah blah. Pay no attention. This is your journey and your life. The truth of your origins is yours, nobody elses so go for it, good or bad the truth is better than being kept in the dark x :)

cantstopLinnyG

Many first parents do not register, sometimes because they do not know there is a registry, and also because they were told to never search. Unfortunately, closed adoption means your records are sealed forever- not just til you're 18, unless you live in an open records state. Many people do not realize this.

This is the most well known search/reunion site:

http://www.plumsite.com/isrr/

Also, many adoptees check out classmates.com and check school class lists in area schools and send messages to people asking if they know of anyone who surrendered a child the time you were born.

Many also start Facebook & Myspace pages with all of their known information- age, dob, hospital, agency, etc. You have to make the pages public, though, and facebook now allows that.

Also, place notices in the Evansville/Southern Indiana Craig's list.

Good luck!

Ranchmom1

If you haven't already talked to them, a good place to start is Lutheran Social Services. I was adopted through Bethany Christian Services in Michigan in a closed adoption in 1967. When I wanted to find my birthmom, I talked to Bethany. In Michigan, there is a confidential intermediary law which meant I had to hire them to do the search for me. I didn't have much money at the time and they agreed to do it for half the usual amount. The search took about 7 months as they only had one person working on these cases part-time. It was a good reunion and my birthfamily and I have a good on-going relationship.

Wishing you well in your search.

Mei-Ling

"I don't want to be rude, but have you ever thought that meeting you birth parents may not be such a good idea?
What if both of them moved on, grew up and got married to other people, had children with their spouses, and never told their children about you. Don't you think it would confuse the children? Or what if your parents never told anyone about you, Sometimes closed adoption are closed for a good reason.
What if your birth parents turn out to be horrible people? I'm not saying it's true, but have you thought of these things? "

I get the concern part, I really do.

But seriously, sitting there and thinking about omg!how horrible they *could* be is never going to accomplish ANYTHING.

You won't know FOR SURE unless you find them, so please do not be discouraged by responses like this. :)

garnettla

i was adopted too but i only know so much i dont know anything really about the registry or thru what services i was adopted, i know my mom was schizophrenic and my father was an oil field worker but i dont know my history and have never been able to contact them. i have tried. ive looked thru yahoo people search under name and number, i looked on myspace, facebook. i even wrote letters the address i had but i never got my letter returned. maybe you can ask your adoptive parents if they knw anything? uhm i know this wasnt much help but i do hope you find what you need to find them.

Marissa

Troy Dunn has helped many locate their lost mothers fathers siblings and children.

go onto his website

http://www.troythelocator.com

and then select and option i suggest the tv one it's free

Edgar Allen Shmoe

You could request a opening for medical reasons. LCFS should do the search for you. I did that. It took 3 months. Found her in Alaska.

There are some good books on Adoption and the reunion process. Go to Borders and find some that you like.

I think you can go before a judge and request they open the file too.

*Milo's Mommy*

I don't want to be rude, but have you ever thought that meeting you birth parents may not be such a good idea?
What if both of them moved on, grew up and got married to other people, had children with their spouses, and never told their children about you. Don't you think it would confuse the children? Or what if your parents never told anyone about you, Sometimes closed adoption are closed for a good reason.
What if your birth parents turn out to be horrible people? I'm not saying it's true, but have you thought of these things?
I was adopted at 3 months old, my grandmother adopted me, and I knew about my birth mother my whole life, and she never treated me like her child and 23 years later she still treats my half brothers better then me... and always will... I'm an out cast to her...
Sometimes I wish that it was a closed adoption and never knew her from what she's put me through....

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