How do you go about a newborn adoption?

My husband & I have a friend that is pregnant but she doesnt want the baby, so she is giving it up for adoption and want us to have the child. She is 12 weeks pregnant & is due in May. How do we go about filling out paperwork?? What paperwork needs to be filled out & what is our next step?? She doesnt know who the father is. She just wants to carry the baby to term for us & then at the hospital she wants us to take the baby & raise it as our own. Does anyone know of how we would proceed with this & what we would do?? Do we need to have papers drawn up by a lawyer?? How would that work with adding the baby to our insurance & getting our names on the birth certificate?? Would we qualify for WIC or any other program since we are going to have a baby in our possession?? My husband & I both adore children & really want our own but unable to have them. Our friend is now pregnant with her 4th but doesnt want anymore children & so she wants to give us the baby.
*Before anyone says anything.....yes she was on birth control but it didnt work*
Any and all information that you can pass on would be wonderful. If you know of a way to get this done as inexpensively as possible that would be even better!!! Thanks for listening & thanks in advance for any information you can provide!
Have a blessed day!

sandwds

For everyone that thinks they know, you qualify for WIC. You do not have to be the child's mother to qualify for WIC. I had my husband's niece for 3 years,and I automatically qualified for it because she wasn't my biological child. Now I would try and work this out through your local DFAC(Department of children and Family Services). Contact a lawyer so that he/she can draw up the adoptions papers and have every party involved so that you can sign it and it be legal(hold up in court of law). Once you have the adoption papers your name does not have to be on the birth certificate, just the adoptions papers to add the child to your insurance. Like I said contact your local DFACS for any other assistance that may be available to you. Good luck

magic pointe shoes

"Have a blessed day!"

Well pffft.

Reality check here. While on the surface it looks like you are being a good friend, you are not. If she has had no counseling about the choice to relinquish, you are exploiting her for her child. If she has no support in finding resources to keep her child, than you are exploiting her for her child. If she hasn't any clue of how important she is to her child and explored how adoption works with continued contact, not only are you exploiting her for her child, you are exploiting a friendship that likely won't continue through the grief of not parenting her child.

I understand that money is tight, but if you can't provide proper counseling for her, than you aren't her friend but attempting to take her baby.

Here is a document you should read to learn how to proceed without harming your friend even further.
Safeguarding the rights and well-being of birthparents in the adoption process.
http://www.adoptioninstitute.org/publications/2006BirthparentStudyrevised07.pdf

Keep in mind though that your friend is not a birthmother, but mother to her child.

Pilgrim Pam

As much as ir wrenches my guts, I have to agree with Sunny on this one. In order to adopt this child you will need a home study done. This study includes checking into your ability to financially support the child. If you cannot, then you will not pass the home study therefore making you ineligible to adopt the baby.

Daisy is Vivalicious

Mainly, you have to get a lawyer to do the paperwork.

And I have to agree with the other posters. If you need wic maybe you are not the right parents for this baby.

anastasia beaverhausen-the real1

why do you feel the need to have your names on the birth certificate?

you aren't giving birth.

birthdad in hell

stay away from agencies for one. my first and only advice is that you seek out an attorney. the mother will have to sign a relinquishment of rights. depending on the state it can't be signed until 48 hours after birth or up to 6 months after birth in which time the mom has the right to change her mind. If she doesn't know the dad i guess it makes it easier but an attempt should be made to find him regardless. an attorney is a must and can tell you better than i what you need to do because i'm from the adoption is evil side of the fence.

Carter

Anyone else think it is strange she used the phrase "possession of a baby" ????????????????????? Give me a break lady, this is a human being you are talking about. I hope to god your "friend" comes to her senses

Fifi k

i would be careful ...

I dont think that its legal to do it like this - get yourself an attorney quickly, but remember that she doesnt have to give you anything if she doesnt want to - if she changes her mind she can take the back at any time...

It could prospectively ruin your friendship ...

I would go through an agency - its much more reliable, but good luck anyways...

jessica300

^^^^^^
ditto what magic pointe shoes said.

Either help her keep her family together or get out of the way. You are NOT helping a woman by separating her from her child. God, I can't imagine what that would feel like, glad I don't have to, pity those who do.

mandita210

Why is one of the first thing you are worried about is getting WIC for the baby? If you can't afford the baby, then you need to think twice about adopting the baby.
I also want to say, I agree with anastasia. You are not the birth parents, so why should your names be on the birth certificate? All its going to be is a lie. I also agree with Sunny, there are alot of red flags here, with everything that you said between the mother and being concerned about getting WIC.

Randy B

Your best bet to ensure things are done properly would be to speak with a lawyer familiar with family law and adoptions. He/she will ensure that the paperwork is done correctly so that everyones rights are respected. You will still need to show that you qualify for adoption in accordance with the rules of your State and that would involve a home study, criminal records check, possibly a credit check and any other paperwork required.

If you qualify then the lawyer can advise you how to ensure that proper insurance coverage and such is in effect during that period of time when the adoption is being worked on. I believe, once the adoption is finalized, the insurance coverage would be no problem because all you need to do is add the little one to your policy in the same way you would add a child you gave birth to. It's the period after birth and before finalization that I'm not too sure of when it comes to a private adoption.

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