How many adoptions lead to suicides?

MamaKate

Dear 23,

No one actually keeps stats on this so many people don't even know it happens at all. It would be hard to keep stats on this anyway, because not all of deaths caused by adoption are direct suicides. Many women also lose their lives due to destructive behavior following adoption loss such as smoking. alcoholism, etc. in an attempt to self-medicate, cope with the loss or simply because they are so desrtoyed they no longer care. The really sad thing is when this happens and there was no substance abuse prior to the adoption. Not directly related but still a deadly side effect.

As to suicide directly related to adoption, it certainly does happen.

I lost a friend this way - she had suffered the loss of her son for 12 years and could not take it anymore. The letter she left behind clearly stated her feelings. I have been on that brink myself.

Cindy's story is truly one of the worst. I feel so sorry for her child. Her memorial page is here:
http://www.remembercindy.com/

It isn't only mothers who can't handle the pain of adoption loss. There have been male victims as well. The loss of a child is profound and can effect other family members besides the mother.

http://www.motherhelp.info/about_me.htm

This loss can also trigger suicidal thoughts for the adoptee:
http://www.adoptioncrossroads.org/Suicide.htm

The saddest part is that most of this suffering is not only unnecessary to begin with but also that it could have easily be prevented with honesty, openness and inclusion.

Lori A

I could have been one of them. Almost.

IDK!!

Just going out on a limb here, if you don't mind..... This can be viewed 2 different ways

1, the pain from adoption was so much that the mother couldn't go on

or

2, the mother had an underlying mental condition, causing them to relinquish at a higher rate, maybe due to low self esteem or chronic depression, maybe because she doesn't feel she deserves to parent her child. I think some of these women are also more likely to experience a crisis pregnancy

So I don't know what the answer is. Does she do it due to the loss?..... or does she relinquish due to a mental issues putting her at risk for suicide, which is maybe why she felt she had to?

I'm not sure if adoption is the cause or the symptom. Or both.

cantstopLinnyG

It's tragic. It is also tragic that people give thumbs down when people tell the truth. Suicide rates are higher amongst adoptees & among first mothers versus their peers who have no connection to adoption. Look at some of these studies and how suicide occurs at a much higher rate in adoptees...Scary

http://www.springerlink.com/content/y73646n507593n76/

http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/cgi/content/full/108/2/e30

Yet people continue to give thumbs down. As an adoptee, I KNOW the truth hurts.

Stinky Pete

way too many

sunny

My mother tried to commit suicide about 6 mos. after my birth. Her parents put her in a "nut house" (her words) to recover.

Her dad asked her what it would take to get her to promise never to do *that* again. She asked to move away. He bought her a house in another state, and she stayed away for over 30 years.

realmom lese

The story you posted is sad. It is horrifying to be used in such a way. To be a human incubator and discarded is about demeaning as it gets. Yet, this occurs every single day in newborn adoption.

I would think suicide in natural moms would be pretty common. I know I have almost gone that route before. After losing a child to adoption, you are dead inside. You just never fully recover. The grief is something that goes to the grave with you, and sometimes, sadly the grave offers the only peace to be found.

Flying Monkey #073177

I've tried many times and obviously failed. I have been hospitalized for suicide attempts three times. I was NEVER suicidal prior to loosing my son. I was a bit emo but most teens are to some degree. I also never had PTSD, self harming tendencies or phobias before relinquishing either. All I had was a nasty little eating disorder, much like many other middle class girls striving for perfection. Thankfully with a butt load of hard work, and some very worthwhile causes to put my energy into, my suicidal ideation along with the attempts are gone.

LMAO!
Nice to see that people here wish I was dead. HAHAHAHA! Not likely, you can't be rid of me that easily.

Helena B

prolly as many adoptees commit suicide because they were given away to adoption

Corn is not dog food! No wheat!

Um, yea, because adoption related suicide statistics are out there for all the world to see.

NOT!!!

And how do you know it's "adoption related"? Suicide AND adoption are such deep, long, hard topics/issues for people that labeling it "adoption related" is a little short sighted.

Plenty of "natural" parents raising children commit suicide.

Plenty of adopted people never even attempt suicide.

Generalization much?

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