I am due in April... He is really pushing for adoption, how can we come to a conclusion we both agree on?

Possum

Make sure you both read this - by women that were pressured into relinquishing their babies -
http://www.cubirthparents.org/booklet.pdf

Every child wants to grow with the mother that he/she was born to.
Who is more important - your man - or your baby??
Adoption is a long term solution to an often short term problem.
I wish you and your baby well.

USAF wife # 2 due in june

your 26 he is 27 plenty old enough to be parents. You cant be "teens" forever. I would keep the baby honestly. IF he is pushing you to have an adoption instead of loving this beautiful child you two made together then it doesnt sound to me like he is a good guy.

It doesnt matter if you did marry young. i was 18 when i got married and had my son. Sounds like he just needs to grow up 27 is a little to late to play teen.

Dreamweaver ILF posse 2009

Keep your baby. If he can't handle it, that's his problem. You sound intelligent and capable.

You give your child up, you will never, ever get over it. Believe me, I've beent here AND I'm adopted too.

blue eyes

adoption does not equal worry free life , you will live your life always worrying about you child , always hoping it is being taken care of and loved

adoption should be a last resort , it sounds like you havent fully felt the impact of want having a child will do to you emotionally, when that baby will be put in your arms it will be the best feeling you will ever feel

if you can afford your baby, i would encourage you too keep it

Crucio

If you want to keep your baby then keep your baby. Both biological parents have to agree and want an adoption for it to happen. I would keep the baby because it sounds like you want that. This guy is just looking to get out of child support. Well too bad so sad buddy he willing did the baby dance and now he needs to accept the consequences. At 27 its not as if he is 17, time to grow up and be an adult.

This man is just going to have to accept that at the very most he is going to be paying child support for at least 18 years. Certainly he should be there emotionally and physical for the baby he created but one can not force someone to be a parent.

durdenslabs

If you are 26 and 27 and you both have jobs, health insurance, a reliable vehicle, a home, and can afford a child (even if you think it might be "iffy" or touch and go sometimes) I'd say keep your baby.

You obviously love each other enough to get pregnant. So go ahead and take the bigger step and keep the baby that you lovingly made together. IF you can take care of it.

snowwillow20

You are adopted so you know the effects of adoption, but do you know the effects on the natural mother. I don't think so. This is what you need to think about, how you will go home empty handed from the hospital, how you will feel on your baby's first birthday, christmas and when your baby asks you, why did you give me up, you aren't a teenager, you can make this work, for your own sanity you must make this work.

Don't let him bully you.

DevonChaos

Since you are adopted, you know the ins and outs of how that goes. You can do it alone if he doesn't want to take care of the baby. Lovers, husbands, boyfriends come and go, but this baby will be yours forever. If you gave up the baby and then your relationship ended, where would you be? I would think that you would have major regrets if that happened. Just listen to your heart, and be brave. You can do it alone if need be, but once that baby is gone, she/he is gone for good.

I went through something similar, and there are always people out there who can help you and give you positive words. I'll be sending you good karma!!

Sally

why are you considering adoption? un-wed? money problems? just want to party some more? none of those are good reasons for adoption in my opinion

Opedial

Um, it is your choice. If you want to raise your child, then raise your child. If he cannot deal then really tough luck for him.

Rowan

unless theres a reason other then wanting a worry free life, adoption shouldnt be in the equation. That is a very selfish reason for giving up your child.

Do you want to keep and raie this child?

Penny A (Vanessa)

Do you really think giving a baby up for adoption provides a 'worry free' life?

This so-called 'worry free life' comprises of:

'did I do the right thing?
Is he okay?
I am so miserable,
I miss him so much,
It's for the best right?
My heart is broken,
I don't have enough support/money to raise him,
I drink too much to be a responsible parent
I just read a story about adoptive parent being abusive, oh no! I hope it doesn't happen to my child etc etc etc'

Does that look worry free to you? Do whatever you think is best but just make sure you educate yourself on all your options before you do anything.

Carol c

If you want to keep your baby, trust your instinct on that. You will never get over the loss of your child. I know because I lost my only child to adoption.
Often it's hard for men to feel those paternal feelings until after a baby is born and they can see, whereas babies begin to bond with their mothers in the womb.

Explain to daddy what it really feels like to be adopted.

Yuki B

Lots of men panic when their girlfriends turn up pregnant. That doesn't mean you have to give up your child. If he wants to freak out, be immature and bail on you, then let him...you and your baby will have each other.

aly

How would you like it if you never met your actualpartents and felt like an unwanted monster all of your life. Or imagine watching the news and you see that a child is brutally stabbed to death by the parents he was adopted to or mistreated and its all your fault because you shouldve taken him/her in the whole time. Plus, a man becomes a father when he sees the baby, a woman becomes a mother when shes pregnant. There is a little helpless baby growing isnside of you and he/she listens to your voice everyday, and is waiting to meet you. And your going to put it into a house he/she is unfamilar with and the whole time the child is going to be longing for its birth mother and father... :(

Musica

Since my husband and I are looking for a child to adopt right now, I can tell you first hand that there are plenty of loving parents out there who would love to parent the child if you decide not to. Some of the other answers so far act like adoptive parents are not going to love the baby the same as you would, but that is not true at all. If you are seriously thinking about adoption I would talk to a good adoption agency. They can help you and talk to you about your decision, even help you talk with a counselor if you think it would help. Google adoption agencies for one in your area.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: