I found out that i was adopted after 21 years.. help me please?

anastasia beaverhausen-the real1

secrecy and lies are so beautiful, eh>

Crucio

I am so sorry this must be a bit of a shock. You might consider joining a group for adoptees who found out late in life that they were adopted. Your still fairly young I have read of people finding out in their 40â€™ and 50â€™s. Since this is all new you need to take some time to digest it. Itâ€™s ok to be mad and angry at your parents they really should have told you a long time ago. As far as you feel its also ok to be upset, angry, sad etc. If you want to you might ask your parents why they did not tell you the truth a long time ago, if they have not already.

Freckle Face

Hi Stephanie,

I'm sorry you are going thru this. All of your feelings are valid. You have the right to feel any way you feel. I hope the people in your life can be supportive of you as you sort thru your feelings.

Since you asked for books, I will quote a regular here and a pretty awesome guy:)

* "Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self" by Brodzinsky, Schecter, and Henig

* "Journey of the Adopted Self" by Betty Jean Lifton

* "The Primal Wound" by Nancy Verrier

I am currently reading The Primal Wound and its a great read. Best of luck to you and remember don't let anyone tell you how you "should" feel:)

moon princess 25

Look up self help books for children who found out they were adopted. Call your local bookstore and ask them if they have anything to help you with this. I can say that if your biological father wanted anything to do with you, he would have. The man who raised you is your father. My son's biological father hasn't had anything to do with him in almost 2 years. My husband is in all of our minds, his father. He know it too. He used to have two daddies but now he has one. I am sorry. I hope you find what you need and put your heart and soul to rest.

streak_taker

I have a brother whom is 23 and he was adopted by another family all together and he met us (his 3 sisters and 1 brother) a little over a year ago. I think he is real excited about it. He has 2 families to love and whom love him VERY much!
I also have a 4 year old daughter that has been raised by my now husband Sense she was 2 years old. She loves him so much and respects him too. I know one day that I will have to tell her the truth that biologically he isn't her father but what are genes? A daddy is someone that loves you no matter what right? And for a man to raise you all of your life and love, respect, and provide for you, now that is unconditional love. So towards him, you should not feel or any different at all.
As far as books go, go to http://www.thereadingtub.com/search_adoption.asp?gclid=CLWCw7X7_ZUCFReSQAodLjF5EA
Many stories there. I hoe this helps and good luck!!

chaoskeyblader777

hes ur dad even tho e adopted!^_^ he luvs u & luv him. or has that changed now that u know ur past? anyway it changes nuthing! so u found out u were adopted,he is still ur real dad. ( a dad is sum1 who luvs & takes care of his family aka u!)

Stephanie K

Blood means nothing.
You love him, he loves you,
to him, you are his daughter,
and he is your father.
I wish you the best of luck;
and take care.

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