I want to adopt a baby?

Heather B

Your sister has her hands full, you could be the bestest hands-on Auntie ever!

Adoption isn't a cure for infertility and putting the burden on a tiny person to heal your woes just isn't fair

I'm really sorry you are grieving the loss of your fertility, but someone elses baby (and someone elses resultant grief) wont fix it for you.

cantstopLinnyG

I am sorry for your loss. I am so glad you chose the high road and do not scour the internet for young vulnerable women like a few people here do. As you can probably gather from many of the adoptees and foster/adoptive parents, newborn and international adoption are full of corruption.

I agree that you could be the best aunt ever to your sister's children, but I also realize you want to be a parent.

Please consider Foster Care adoption. They are the only children who truly need homes. You can contact your local or state Foster care program. Good luck!

myst1998

Hi there,

I am sorry you have had to go through this pain. It is unimaginable and a huge loss.

Before you look into alternatives to having a child in your life, I feel you really need to validate this loss and find some peace with the fact you will not be a mother they way you wanted to be. So many people turn to adoption before they deal with this and it doesn't help matters; two worngs can never make anything right - more loss does not make loss disappear.

What you need to recognise if you do proceed to look into adoption that there is a huge loss to both mother and baby. It is a tragedy when a mother feels she has no alternative to adoption and separates herself from her child. The baby feels it and has to live with this pain and loss the rest of their life; sometimes never realising how much it affects them. Most mothers who have relinquished or lost a child to adoption do NOT get over it and usually regret their decision to place. Adoption is too often used to try and 'fix' infertility but what people don't see is that it causes a much larger issue.

Once you have dealt with YOUR issues, I would ask you to look at the foster care system and see if you could give a home to those children who really NEED one and are desperate for someone to love and nurture them. I know its not the same as caring for a newborn but its better than trying to persuade a mother that might not want to part with her baby to part with him/her.

All the best with things. My very best friend was recently told she could not have a child either also due to pcos and she is devastated. She is a Nanny and loves children and has dreamed all her life of being a mother. Seeing first hand the devastation adoption causes she has decided against adoption. It is very, very hard for her.

Take care.

Independ"ant"

"i know that i am being selfish"

Acknowledgment is a start to recovery.

There are plenty of kids in foster care waiting to be adopted.
You may not get a baby but obviously that's not in the cards for you.

ESweetPea

Work on having a good life, baby or no.

When you feel more positive about life in general, you'll be in a better position to have a child, adopt a child, or go on without a child.

Ideally, a baby would come into a family that is prepared for it, both physically (good health, finances, and other resources) and emotionally. You're not in the best condition to have a baby come into your life. This desperation, this longing, this bitterness...this will not be solved by a baby, and it would be unfair for you to bring a baby into your life when you're not prepared.

Work on yourself.

The baby will come or not. But you're stuck with yourself for the rest of your life, and you have to be OK with that, no matter who else comes and goes.

aloha.girl59

Adoption should be about finding parents for children who need them. If you truly want to raise a child who needs a parent, contact the Department of Child & Family Services in your area and ask about foster-to-adopt. There are thousands of waiting children across the U.S. who need parents! I know because I adopted my son through DCFS in Los Angeles almost 6 years ago.

crzymmof8

Foster to adopt. I did and have wonderful children to show for it. Some of my kids came as babies and some came older. I have a wonderful son who is 17 who was in foster care for 12 years before we adopted him. He is incredible and deserved a family just as much as a baby. There are so many kids who need people to love them and provide them with a safe home.

Dalton's Mommy

Hey, sorry about not being able to have a baby. If you have a stable income and want to adopt you can. There are plenty of kids who need a good home. I don't even think you need to be married anymore.

allchildrenareangels

Have you considered foster to adopt or have have you consider invitero fertilization. I think once you have a child of your own your jealousy will fade. If I were you I would get started with foster to adopt. It helps a child and it doesn't cost to go through them. You might even be able to adopt a sibling group. Good luck.

Love,
Michelle

Anne

Wanting a baby will never go away. proceed with adoption!!

Î›nna

Go to India, Ethiopia , Iraq or Russia and adopt a child that really needs you. There are so many children in these countries that are dying in crowed orphanages, adopted them, love them, and be a mom!

good luck

http://www.ehow.com/how_1688_adopt-child.html

popsicle lovaa

2 words "baby mama" (get one)

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