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tish
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crackhead...crazy person??? that's deep.
but, ironically....it's because of this "crackhead" that you are a parent. kinda odd, heh? also, is she attempting to give the baby to "your" MIL or her MIL??? i'm confused. although i would NEVER support placing a child in an unsafe situation, i fail to see how this woman's substance use is relevant. and i really hope you are not calling this child's mother a crackhead in her [the child's] presence.
anyway...regarding "giving baby away": many states have safe haven laws where women can leave their babies (usallly at hospitals, fire stations, child protection agencies) without penalty.
ETA: i find it AMAZING that we are so quick to judge substance use when it's poor, marginalized people. but, where is the judgment against about 40% of the affluent doctor's wives in my neighborhood (some of whom are parents and *gasp* aparents) who are pill-popping tranqs, and barbituates...with a vodka chaser?... but i guess it ok to only judge poor women whose substance use we can exploit.
get over yourselves... seriously. and i reiterate, i find it interesting how quickly we demonize the very same women whose children we are quick to commendeer fresh from the womb. |
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o'leary
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She cannot legally give her baby away (and allow her to adopt) without consent or notification of both biological parents. Is it your son's baby? If so he could get Social Services involved from your local County. If he's not, you have no say in the matter, but could notify someone in that dept about the situation. They might not do anything about it, but it's probably the most you could do. |
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Santa's Lil' Helper
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As a hospital employee I can tell you this will not fly to well with nurses and case managers....if they find out they WILL call social services. Poor kid. Calling someone a crackhead is rather harsh....do you know this for sure? I really hope you do not refer to her as the "crackhead" in front of your daughter, this would be seriously detrimental to her self esteem and emotional well being not to mention cruel!
Woman leave their children behind more times then you think....it is usually due the child being born with illegal substances in their system or a child with an overwhelming medical needs. |
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grapesgum
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As other posters have pointed out, it depends on her status with social services and her and her baby's health after delivery. If the hospital does drug screening and she passes, I believe that she can arrange any care for her child that she wants. For example, she could arrange for a kinship care or guardianship relationship with your mother-in-law which qualifies your mother-in-law to receive services for the child, including health care. Adoption is not required to receive services coverage. Millions of families use kinship care and guardianships to keep children within the families.
I'm not saying that it is appropriate in THIS case. Just wanted to point out that it is an option that people use that does not require a formal adoption. |
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jm1970
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No it isn't legal.
You should report it to the authorities if you think this woman is a threat to the child.
Also, if she is using while pregnant you should report her. They can test the baby at the hospital and if she's positive the child will enter foster care at birth.
Do it anonymously so she doesn't mess around with your visitation and such with your daughter.
Once the child is in foster care, they will make attempts to LEGALLY place the child with maternal or paternal family members or the child's father if he is suitable.
They may also give you custody of your daughter if you don't have it already. |
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B.E.W.10
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Report this to social services... kind of an odd situation. I imagine you can give your child away, but somewhere down the line that person is going to need custody papers in order to protect themselves. Good luck! |
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Heather Leigh
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She can give your MIL guardianship of the baby. Depending on the State, this is nothing more than having a notarized statement giving the MIL the right to seek medical attention, enroll in school, etc.
They can also go to court for guardianship. This is usually for 6 months and they have to go back to court to renew it. This does not involve CPS. |
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Morgaine
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So either this is your ex-wife placing her baby with HER mother, which I see nothing wrong with,
OR you are calling the biological mother of your adoptive daughter a crackhead/crazy person. Which is so very respectful of the person who gave your child to YOU (please notice my sarcasm).
And people wonder why adoptive parents are not exactly respected by a lot of the people here. It is people like you who give us a bad name. |
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InMyOpinion
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Yes, she can. but if you have concerns for the child and the mother-in-law's ability to care for her, you can call the child welfare office. |
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Carnie C
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what happens when she tries to get medical insurance for this child? the insurance company will ask who this new little dependent is and will need a birth certificate.
or a social security number?
or enrolls her in school without being listed on the birth certificate or legally adjudicated as a guardian?
uhmm, what should we call confirmed crackheads? should we call them Madonnas? looks like a duck, quacks like a duck it's a duck. |
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DaYgO gIrL
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The same thing happened to us. we tried to help this (crackhead) about 2 yrs ago. we did not know that she had plans to leave us the baby. we just thought that she was going to stay with us to stay off the drugs. and she did I did not allow her to do drugs of leave me sight! baby came out clean thank GOD! well baby was here for two days and she left and never came back. She called us and said that she didnt want to have this baby around crack and that she knew we were good people and asked us to kep the baby. Well at the time We were like ok. Kept the baby for 1 1/2 yrs. All we did was get a noterized letter from her saying that i was to care for the baby. and this is how i took her to appointments and cared for her. It was soo hard but i did it. one day she came over and i could tell she was cracked out. she asked for the baby and i told her you cant take her you are far from being fit to care for her. she went off and hit me well i knocked her out!! and told her to clean her act and she could have the baby. she called the cops. I should the cops all the paperwork and facts to prove that the baby was with me since birth and the cops said they didnt care she could still take the baby. even though she was clearly cracked out!! I was pissed. The cop told me to take her to court. and that i could get the baby back. well you cant take someone to court if you cant find someone!! never seen them. then about 2 months ago I see her on the news. being charged for killing her baby, the same baby I had. I cried for days I still cry! so be careful!
edit: about having repect for crackheads I disagree. crackheads that bring harm around their chilren deserve no respect. it is what it is! At least you are showing concern! and that is what matters!! |
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TotalRecipeHound
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Yes, she can give the kid to your MIL. Then your MIL can go to CPS and get an emergency guardianship. From there, it goes to a judge to remove parental rights. The process is much easier and quicker if the mother will sign the necessary paperwork.
When babies are involved with drug addicts, I truly DO see that as a reason to end parental rights with little fanfare, provided a legitimate search has been made for any ex-bf that might be the father. Yes, hard to believe, but some perfectly nice guys try to fix their drug addicted girlfriends. The child shouldn't be denied both parents if one of them is decent. |
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ellie
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I don't know what state this woman lives in but most states do not allow "private" adoptions. At least not with out some kind of legal paper work. This is why the states do home studies on all prospective adoptive parents. This process usually take 3-6 months - minimum during which time the child in question could possibly live in foster care until primary screenings are done. It is a fairly lone process as they are trying to make sure the adoptive parents are appropriate and that the birth parents are making the right decision. The state would offer the birth mother the chance to get cleaned up if she wanted to keep her baby - they would look for the father - who also has rights - they would look for other family members who also have rights. Giving a baby away is not like finding a home for a puppy or a kitten.
ellie |
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HappyMomAnna
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If your daughter was adopted via Foster Care her bio mother's choices will NOT be the same.... If the baby is born with a positive tox screen the state will ordinarily take custody of new siblings right at the hospital...
The families with the Adopted Children are considered relatives and have some say so about the relatives who are later born... If the state takes custody and clearly it appears they may have been involved in the past....
If not then I would take a step and make a Referral to the DHS or CPS office where the mother or grandparent lives and let them know your concerns.... |
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Gaia Raain
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I would just like to take a moment to give a standing ovation to Tish and Morgaine.
Might want to listen to these folks. They've got some good advice for you. |
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Lady Astarte
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Yeah...it's legal. If you're concerned about the mother in law raising the baby, you may want to call CPS to discuss the matter with them. |
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Jessica B
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She can, but it might be best if she just gives it to the hospital and they can place the baby with someone who wants a baby. |
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Cynthia
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She can. There will be legal matters if your MIL wants to get custody through the courts or any legal validation and rights to the child. But, the short answer is that yes she can. |
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Gerry
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Report her to authorities, that is against the law! |
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