Is the adoption industry driven by women?

maybe

Yes, the adoption industry is the result of a certain class of women who are willing and able to exploit another class of women. I've never heard a man say it was his dream to raise another man's child.

For the poster who mentioned "supply" side economics in adoption - there is a very, very limited supply of infants available for adoption. The demand greatly exceeds the supply and this has resulted in the desperate measures employed by agencies and would-be adopters. They will go to almost any length to acquire an infant.

cruzgirlz3

I do think it is driven by women Sunny, but I also think it is created by men. I'm always amazed by how little men are even mentioned on this site. To a large extent women are put in difficult positions because they do not have the support of men. Many are pretty much abandoned. The financial futility that women feel is often the result of women feeling they must raise a baby alone. Unfortunately, other women do capitalize on the vulnerability of others.

monkeykitty83

<<Have you EVER seen (a poster here) or HEARD of a man who wants to adopt, but has to be 'talk my wife into it'?>>

Yes. He wanted to adopt foster kids, but never managed to talk her into it.

That would be why I have no siblings.

Carol c

"it is a tragic example of women oppressing other women"

Stinky Pete - I am in total agreement with you - this statement sums it up. Those women who CANNOT covet the infants of those who CAN but are not being supported either emotionally or financially. This is why organizations such as NOW never seem to grasp the fact that using manipulative tactics to encourage and/or force women to give their children up is a woman's abuse issue.

If a woman is truly a feminist or claims concern for women, they should be doing what they can to help a mother who desperately wants to keep her child.

BOTZ

Yes, it is. But it's not only driven by women, it's also 'fueled' by them -- who do you think is having all the babies that are being taken for adoption (voluntarily or not)?

Do you really think a sad, scared, vulnerable girl/woman is going to take 'nurturing' and 'loving advice and counsel' from a man?

Well, there are a few -- very few -- men that are social workers (even in adoption agencies and doing adoption through DCFS) but they are hard to find and seem to work their way "up the ladder" (ref: your comment on money to be made) faster than their female colleagues.

I am a social worker but I have NEVER worked in adoption. I have worked with children who were eventually adopted but that was a separate division.

I don't believe, in the history of the world, ANY man has ever wanted to or had to talk his wife into adoption.

There may be some demand from gay couples, but they are still in the minority as they are often discriminated against. And, they are generally a lot more willing to adopt children who REALLY need a home.

Laurel J

For the most part, I believe the adoption industry is composed of women who prey on other women and the men and women who enable them.

However, men don't get a free pass. When men take the kid in to their home, they show they're just as willing to "take something so precious" away from both its parents as the woman is. In fact, if you aren't consumed by the "need" for a child, yet allow an unethical adoption to proceed to make your wife happy anyway, you're the worse individual because you did it with your eyes unclouded by emotion.

There are men with better morals and men with worse. There's no "man code." There's no "woman code" either.

Sly

Absolutely, Sunny! The "Give me a baby lest I die" bunch are in there, and the women who want to accommodate them. It is all women on the front lines, doing the recruiting, the training, the coercing and the predating on the more vulnerable women. But, behind the scenes, the Machiavellian orchestrators are the men, or the women who are wannabe men.

I think that the Women's Movement stopped way short of allowing women equality even in this field. It is all still dominated by the men, all the way up to the politicians who write the rules.

myst1998

Yes... it is. I also think it is fueled by women as another poster said. I completely agree with you. Great point!

Stinky Pete

it is a tragic example of women oppressing other women

Nexra

It certainly seems so.

opedial

Many industries are driven by women but that does not mean they are good for women! Fashion magazines are driven by and for women, but they are not necessarily good for women to read!

I actually had my husband bring up adoption first, but I wasn't a hard sell so to speak. But beyond that yes women drive the adoptions. Especially healthy white infant adoptions, these are and were always driven by women who cannot have their own children. Of those who thought they were helping a nice poor woman out...and they get a baby out of it.

So yes women are driving force of adoption, but I would be interested to see who is actually making the MONEY off of adoption?? That, likely will be the men...all formalized systems are patriarchal in the end.

MamaKate

You have several great answers here, and I have to agree.

And people say women are less predatory than men. *Pffft.*

So much for universal sisterhood...

Randy B

I don't know if it's "driven" by women but they do have a vested interest in it, more so then men, by virtue of the fact that they are the ones carrying the children that are placed for adoption and the fact that fathers (regardless of their desire or lack of desire to assume that role) can be shut out of the process if she chooses not to list him on the birth certificate.

bestadvicechick

You mention the demand side but you're forgetting the SUPPLY side. Everything in our economy is driven by BOTH so to ignore that is naive. Yes, there are those whose desire for a child drives up demand. But perhaps the "industry" would never be there unless there was also a supply. There will always be some young women who find themselves in over their heads expecting a child that they either don't want or can't take care of on their own. Yes, I know there is help available to them and fortunately, many find the help they need. But there are some women who just don't WANT to be a mother but it happens anyway. I know no one wants to hear that but it's the truth. Just because you have the ability to make a child doesn't mean you're necessarily cut out for it. So while there will always be a demand for babies, it's sadder to me that there will always be a supply. Kids who are born into this world should be WANTED and unfortunately that's not always the case.

Cash

As an adoptive parent I think it is driven by women out of necessity - most woman want children, whether married or single, I know of many a single adoptive mom (I'm married) and without woman to give their newborn up for adoption it couldn't happen. Perhaps the original thought was not so much the demand for infants as the need to place infants by women who didn't feel it was the right time to keep a child. Seems pretty simple unless I'm missing something.

crazychickizback

In a sense yes, because that is where babies come from so without women there would be no children, hence no adoption (or humankind, for that matter). I do think "fueled" is a better word, though

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