My husband and I are considering adoption through CPS.?

YA Sucks

I have worked 10+ years in CPS adoptions as a social worker and supervisor, as well as experience in private agencies. My experience was that they are a very good group of people to work with. The typical things to be aware of are to ask as many questions about the children as possible, so you can be the best parent to them from the beginning. There is no cost to adopt through CPS and a federal program called Adoption Assistance Program will provide money for the child's care, after the adoption, until age 18 along with MedicAid/MediCal. You should be open to the idea of an older (3 years+) child, a child of minority ethnicity, and/or a child with a history of abuse and/or neglect. In my experience, children are resilient and when placed with a good family, any issues from their past usually subside with love, hugs, and maybe a good counselor or two if necessary.

My advice is ask as many questions about the child's history before they are placed with you so you can provide the best care, and ask about the legal risk of the child -- meaning the likelihood the child would be reunified with the birth parent. Once parental rights are terminated, there's almost no chance of reunification with the birth parent -- that's a low or 0 legal risk.

Additionally, be prepared for anything. There will be a honeymoon period, then you may see some testing of your will for a while, but if you persevere, your child will have the family he/she needs and you will have the family you want.

That's the nature of CPS adoption, creating families.

Go for it!

Bird's Girl

My best friends family did that and they are so thankful they did. It is such a rewarding experience. Good for you, you and your husband must have good hearts! Good luck.

Heather Leigh

My youngest son is adopted through the Foster care system. He came to live with us when he was 5 years old; left to live with his Bio-grandparents for almost a year then went back into Foster Care. His last Foster parents abused him also.

I won't lie and say it has been easy. He was severely abused and neglected by his original father. He has Fetal Alcohol Effects and he has some emotional and behavior issues. (Who wouldn't with his background?) He is in counseling twice a week. Once on his own and then a family session.

We were originally told that he was mentally retarded. Had a very low IQ and had severe Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. But, thankfully, he only has mild FAE which is part of his inability to control his emotions.

To me these are minor issues compared to what we were expecting. He is an all around jock...There isn't a sport he does not excel at. He is also an honor roll student. He is far from "mentally retarded". He has been through so much is such a short time and the lasting effects are minimal in my opinion.

My other children were resentful of him because of the extra care he needed. Especially my middle son. But now than they are older it is much better. I think the family counseling also helped.

So, I guess the best advice I can give is to expect your child to have issues. They are in Foster Care for a reason. Be open to counseling...It is helping us immensely! And finally, be positive about their Original (Bio) family. No matter what your adopted child has been through, they will always love their original family. As an adoptive parent we need to respect that and not feel threatened by it! (See this is where the counseling comes in...It helped me realize this!)

If you have any other specific questions, feel free to email me and hopefully I can help.

Ruth P

I adopted my son after having him as a foster child for two years. He just was not readily adopted because he had some health issues. I love him dearly and have never regretted adopting him. He is 25 now and a son to be proud of. Yes you should do it. CPS knows if a child is legally free for adoption or not and won't let you adopt a child if his natural parents can take him back. It's a different story, of course, if you are foster parents rather than adoptive parents, but you know that going in. There are many children who need stable homes rather than to be passed around the foster care system. Kudos to you! Go for it!

Independ"ant"

I think its admirable for you and you husband to go this route. Those children are in true need of a home and are ignored because of the flawed international systems allowing parents to practically buy children.

Renee King

My husband and I are also thinking of going through the foster to adopt program in our state instead of an agency. Our first son was adopted through the state system. His birth mother (family adoption) lost custody and never would finish her courses, etc to gain custody back of her children, so all were placed in the system, the oldest for over 5 years. Each have perm. homes now and though it was a long process, our son is such a joy that we are considering going through the process again.

Dayle

We will be finalizing our third adoption next week, through CPS. We chose to adopt through them, because of the large number of children in the US, that need forever families.
We have had wonderful caseworker, that were caring and so helpful and kind. We are a military family and have adopted in the states of Ohio, Georgia and Florida and would highly recommend CPS.

Gaia Raain

Firstly, the answerer who suggested going international obviously isn't aware that adoption is permanent, no matter if it's international or not (and she obviously also isn't aware that it's in the child's best interests to have open information and communication with and about their natural family).

Anyhoo, my husband and I have gone through the process and are on the waiting list at the moment. Feel free to email me, ask questions, chat, whatever. Best of luck to you!

CaterpillarGirl

I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't do adoption in the United States period because sometimes the actual parent of the kid can take them back. It's better to do it internationally.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: