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My husband and I are looking to adopt??
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My husband and I are looking to adopt??

We have been married for 4 1/2 years and have been trying for 3. We have gone through 3 IUI's and 2 rounds of in-vitro. We are now wanting to try to adopt but have no clue where to start. I have found so many websites, but don't know which ones will work best. Please give me some advice!!
Additional Details
We are from Kentucky


    




BPD Wife
I have been where you are. We TTC for 8+ years, with 3 failed ICSI procedures. It certainly takes a toll on you. The best advice that I can give you though is to take time to grieve your loss of pregnancy before you start the adoption process.

Adoption can be a stressful journey and you need to be sure that you are mentally prepared for the journey, as well as the "instant" motherhood that you receive when you bring your child home.

When you are ready, I recommend contacting a local reputable adoption agency. They will be able to discuss all of the different types of adoption that are available and help you to decide which type of adoption would be best for your family. We used Adoptions From the Heart. If they cannot help you, they might be able to suggest an adoption agency in your area.

Good luck to you.


Gaia Raain
Sounds like you've got some grieving to do first. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Take your time, and do as much research as possible. Adoption is really hard on adoptees, usually, and it's really not a win-win-win situation. Some books to read are "The Primal Wound" and "Twenty things adopted kids wish their adoptive parents knew".

If you decide that adoption is the path for you, please consider adopting through foster care. There are over 100,000 children waiting in foster care for families, and not enough families who are interested in adopting them; whereas there are 90 families waiting to adopt every healthy, white infant in the US.

I wish you luck on your journey!


MMG
My husband and I just finished our homestudy with a local agency here in CA. While doing our homestudy we did the best we could to research adoption. We have decided to adopt through the foster care system. There are many children in your area waiting to be adopted. Your county should be able to provide you with information about foster adopt if that is what you are interested in. You can also use an agency, look for one near you. We chose to use an agency so we wouldn't be limited to adopting through only our county's foster care system. It is not very expensive to adopt through the foster care system however international adoption is very expensive. If we had gone through our county it would have been completely free to adopt our agency does charge a small fee. I know from personal experience that fertility treatments can be costly so this may be a consideration for you, it was for us. Toddler Adoption The Weaver's Craft by Mary Hopkins-Best is an excellent book.


Freddie
I don't recommend looking to adopt through the internet. Go to your local county social service agency. Find an agency LOCALLY-a social services agency and adopt amoung the children whose parents have ALREADY REQLINQUISHED their rights. Don't try and meet up with an innocent teenager or a woman who's confused & doesn't want to change her lifestyle by having a baby & try to convince them to give their child to you.

If you really want to provide a loving home to an CHILD who doesn't have one then I'm sure you'll find plenty of children righ tthere in Kentucky.


hmc
Rating
I know how hard it is. I went through many iuis as well and miscarried a couple of times. We ended up stopping all treatments and decided to adopt internationally. It was the best decision we ever made. We found a local agency that was a perfect fit for us in our local phone book..they helped us thorough the whole process and made it as easy as possible. they also helped choose the best country for us. which happened to be colombia. we only had to wait for a year before we found out about adopting a little girl. We spent about 3 weeks in colombia and enjoyed it. Exactly one and a half years after adopting her we found out I was pregnant. I wouldn't change anything about our decision. I'm sorry i don't know of any agencies in your area for we live in NY. but best wishes on your quest.


sk8ermom
If you are anxious to get started go ahead and call a local agency for your homestudy. That does not mean you are commited to use them for your adoption. A domestic homestudy is good for either private or public (state) adoption. You can research agencies and programs while getting your HS complete so you are ready to go when you find what is right for you.
The internet has been a wonderful tool to use in finding our daughter. All the situations we were matched with and all the information and contacts we made were all made over the internet. I strongly encourage you to join the yahoo grous "2adopt" and "adoptionscams". These have been some of the best resources available.
As for state adoption, unless you are interested in a child over 10-12, don't leave that as your only option. It never hurts to register and check their websites often though. Its free to submit your paperwork on a child and you can submit on as many as you like. It is a long shot though as compition for these available children is heavy.
As far as domestic infant adoption, there are some great African American programs out there with no fee's until placement. Always check in on those groups to find out which agencies are the best and which ones are known for being unethical. You don't want some woman talked out of her child. Its just heart breaking.

You can Email me off here and I can answer any questions you need. I answer adoption questions often :)


Mom of 2
I called the state and asked for licensed adoption agencies. When I got the list I called many and asked for further information. Then I chose the one I thought was best for us.

Best of luck. You will not regret adopting.


QueenD
Search the BBB. (google it)


kc_4bez07
Rating
how about a serrigant?


hailey
my family just adopted a 13 year old boy from the ukraine. he came to the U.S with a bunch of other kids thinking they were going on a field trip but really they were being looked at for adoption. The kids stayed at different ppls houses we had 2 boys stay at my house. its not a commitment to adopt but just a trial they come for like 2 or 3 weeks and you get to know them and if you decide not to adopt them they don't know and you can take them places to be looked for for adoption. you can search "family hope" or email me if you think you are intersested my emials haileyanna09@yahoo.com Good luck and God bless





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