Okay, really tough decision.?

Opedial

Taking care of someone's daughter who died, is good and well, but you should be a legal guardian, in case husband gets it together. You will not be the new mom, and when it is someone you know and the dad is in the picture, you can't be new mom, but you can be guardian. There are also questions about extended relatives etc.

If she did not put it in the will, then the wishes have not been officialy known.

kitta

If Mary was serious, she would put this in writing. If she didn't, then you cannot adopt the child. The courts won't let you.

You might be able to become a guardian, but even then, there will be people ahead of you, most likely other relatives. If they know the father is a serious drug addict, they will be either trying to get him some help, or they will be trying to prove him unfit so they can get the child away from him in order to get custody.

This is sort of like the movie "Beaches."

cantstopLinnyG

If Mary did not put that down in her will, or any other official documents, the baby will first go to her father. If he is not able to care for her, the baby will (and should) go to someone in Mary's family. You seem to have a lot on your plate.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=ArMV_Kv4JesS.YgrK9mYYZvsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20090106135219AAhufmB

sam22254

You can't unless the father agrees or you prove him unfit and good luck. It's the same for a woman., You need to remember that mary picked this man to marry. I bet the father don't know your running him down or I bet you wouldn't have his daughter right now. He might think your just trying to be a friend to help out . Not to stab him in the back. Most people that marry a person on drug's do them to or have done drugs. I would tell the father what you want to do and see what he says. If he doesn't want the child then it would less costly for you.

Terry F

well yes u have to know that she has to do a lot of things she needs to go to school and classes so ya a lot of work so u should do it trust me ok.

Leigh

go for temp custody, give dad a chance to clean up and if not, i would adopt allowing dad to participate in her life as long as he's sober & it's supervised you have a heart of gold the world needs more caring people like you i wish you the best of luck

anastasia beaverhausen-the real1

no.

Corn is not dog food! No wheat!

What happened to Mary's family? I'm certain sure Livana's grandmother is frantically searching for her.

What happened to the father's family? He has parents, and maybe siblings that should raise the child.

Even if Mary did put it in writing the father STILL has to sign over his parental rights before you can adopt. Grandparents STILL have the right to raise the baby.

Hannah Sheckler

I'm so sorry,
that is allot of responsibility, i think there is a reason for it, so yes, adopt her.

1'm A s3cret NiNjA!! shh!!!

I think you should because since the dad is a drug addict, who knows when that poor baby will die of second hand smoke. Adopt her. What if when he's high, he hurts her? Adopt the poor child.

jazzi's mama

if you're a ready to. but do what is best for the baby

Bee

well if it's not in her will the it just depends .

if you have the option to then I say yes because you don't want that little girl growing up with her drug addicted father .

love my babies and my bump

How can anybody answer that for you? Do whatever you feel is right. It won't be an easy road no matter what you decide. I would do it.

If you think your ready to raise a baby you should but remember it's the hardest thing in the world to do and it takes alot of time and money. I wouldn't leave the baby with the father if he's not fit. Obviously your friend trusted you with the most important thing in her life don't let her down. That doesn't mean keep the baby if your not ready but make a choice for the baby that will be best for her.

Girlie Girl

If you can afford it and take on the emotional and other responisbility then yes, take her if you can get dad to agree. otherwise you might need to get a professional such a social worker involved if he is a drug addict.

Chris

First, you cannot use a will to dictate child custody. Just as you cannot use pre-nups to decide who gets children/child support.

Second, you're a friend, not a father. If you keep the kid and you know that he wants the child back (or have reason to know that he wants the child back), you could be charged with kidnapping.

If you're concerned, call Child Protective Services.

life001

yep

Tay

I would adopt because I agreed to my friend.....I think that she sounds like a good child.You dont want her to end up in foster care because she can end up in anyones hands or go to live with her father who is a drug addict. Keep her until she is old enough to live on her own

cla ro

yeah. i think god has given this little girl to you for a reason.

there's no need to rush into it right now if you aren't totally sure (although i think in your heart you have already decided)

give it a few months and if you feel confident about it then think about adopting her.

i think right now you are still grieving for your friend and you shouldnt' let that cloud your judgement, but at the same time it shouldn't force you into things.

give it time to breathe. she's just a tiny baby who doesn't know what is happening. the prioroity here is that she is alright.

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