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Possum
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He's probably trying the scare tactics as he doesn't want to be responsible for the child - and perhaps doesn't want to pay child support down the track.
You have rights to keep this child - they trump anything he will try to do.
Keep notes about EVERYTHING he says or does - just in case he tries to prove that you're incapable of caring for the child - and you then have proof that he's trying to get out of his responsibilities.
You may well have to raise this child on your own - and he may not end up signing the birth cert.
Also document things for your child - so this child will one day know who his/her father is - as it's important for children to know where they came from.
Stand strong - seek legal advice - get support around you.
What's best for this baby - if you can love and care for the child - is to stay with you. Both emotionally and psychologically.
Don't let this man pressure you into doing anything you don't want to.
I wish you and baby all the very best. |
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anastasia beaverhausen-the real1
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he can't put the child up for adoption with out your consent. |
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Jennifer L
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I want to be sure I understand this.
You are pregnant and want to parent your child. The baby's father wants to petition the courts to force you to place the child for adoption?
No, he can't do this. Nobody can force you to relinquish your child for adoption. |
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snowwillow20
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He's trying to scare and bully you. Document everything he says and does. He is trying to get out of paying child support. Whether he signs the birth certificate or not, he is sill the baby's father, and just because he doesn't sign it doesn't mean he will be free of responsibilites. |
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tish
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seriously...
count your blessings. this guy sounds like a total douche with no ability to think about anyone but himself. legally, he can NOT make you give up your child. it also appears as if he's been talking to people who are giving him BAD advise on how to make his "little problem" go away.
a couple of things:
1) if he doesn't want to sign the BC, take him to court for paternity.
2) make sure you petition for a child support order against him.
3) have a healthy pregnancy (pregnancy is tough enough without the added stress of some dude who's only looking out for himself).
4) go on with your life.
many young women (myself included) had children with men who were unwillinging to step up to the plate. yet, it's not the fault of the children born to these situations.
best of luck |
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springchic
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You need to consult with an attorney or a local court of jurisdiction in your area. Have the baby is US> where I live, if two unmarried people have a child, baby is automatically in custody of mom, so there is nothing he could do. But laws vary from state to state, so find out soon and make sure you and your child are protected. NO state would do an adoption on your child without your consent. |
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Lela A
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threats are not lega, just words..mere words...you have rights and I was seek out legal advice and take matter to family court if necessary |
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JustMeTiff
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No body can make you put your child up for adoption.. and they can't take the child away from you unless you can be proven an unfit mother. Nevermind him. After that baby is born you go petition for child support, they will order a paternity test... no need for him to sign the birth certificate.. Congratulations on your pregnancy and best wishes! |
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somebodyznobody
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He can't make you do anything.
But PLEASE DOCUMENT everything he says. Do not speak to him via the phone (unless you record it), keep in contact via email or post, so that you have EVIDENCE of his behaviour. He sounds very controlling.
He probably does not want to pay support for HIS child. You will have to way up the pro's and con's to having this person still in your life, ie, if you go to court to make him pay support, will he cause trouble for you, will he down the line, once he's settled, insist on seeing the child and try and take her/him off you? Is he the sort to try and make out you are a bad mother and give you lots of hassle?
I feel sorry for the child, and hope he/she never finds out, what a turd their father is/was.
Wishing you joy, with your child. |
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TotalRecipeHound
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He's full of it. He just doesn't want to grow up and face responsibilities. |
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Crucio
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Your baby daddy is full of nonsense. He can’t petition to force you to place your baby for adoption. You should try and get any medical / heritage information from him for your baby. Then move on and be a good mother to your child. You might even get him to sign away his rights if he truly dosent want to be a daddy your baby deserves better. Of course once child is born he could change his mind. If not hopefully one day you will find a good father for your child. |
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sam22254
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Let's see if I have this right. Your baby's father wants you to put the baby up for adoption ? And you don't want to? Oh well you don't have to do the adoption. He does have to pay child support. Now if you want to put the child up for adoption then you need his consent unless he doesn't support you in anyway. My son has been going through this difference is he didn't know about the baby or her plans for the second child they would be having together she hid to give the child to her new boyfriends family. She also hid their daughter for 7 months. He has been fighting to get his son returned for right now he has visitaion which has been hard when he pays almost 400 month for the daughter and has to pay his way to see his son 3 states away every month on the months he can't go because of money he's depressed. So for the best interest in your child do the right thing inculded both your self and the father in what ever you decide. |
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Bo Peep
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If you are a fit parent there is nothing he can do to force your child to be taken into care and adopted. It sounds to me that he is a major bully and he has done nothing to help you out during your pregnancy - a time when you should be stress free and as peaceful as possible. I believe he is calling your bluff - keep a record of emails, or dates of phone calls just in case.
This is almost certainly a case of him not wanting to pay any support for his child...
Try not to let him worry you - you have more important things to think about right now.
Do take care. |
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Randy B
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Yer golden. You have your baby and love him/her with all your heart. Nobody can "petition" you to give the baby up for adoption. He may try to get custody through the court but that most likely wouldn't work either and he would have to do it through a US court which would require him to move. I bet he finds it too much work. |
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hargonagain
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Nobody can make you give up your child unless they prove you are an unfit mother. If he doesn't want the child and you do, then you get to keep him/her unless the courts decide you are unfit, but they can't deem you unfit until after the baby is born and they see how you do raising him/her. Your boyfriend is full of crap, don't listen to him. |
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Wayne S
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I think you have everyone's support on keeping the child. But you do have a difficult decision to make. You can name him as the father and attempt to make him pay child support or have him sign his rights as a parent. From the way it sounds you will have to make sure you have the finances and support to raise the child on you own. Either way you will need to get legal counsel. |
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xlinzx88x
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He can't have the baby taken away from you, at least not in the states. If he really doesn't want the child, have him sign away his parental rights. |
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Mrs. Mendez
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he can just sign over the rights or just dont even claim him as the father ,and no he cant make you put the baby up for adoption |
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GEE-GEE
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Don't worry too much about him. He is not a US citizen. Even if he was he could not force you to put your baby up for adoption. That's just ridiculous. And if you don't want him to sign the birth certificate just tell the hospital. He can't sign it unless you want him to.
Don't stress about things. It sounds like you are better off without this creep. Just go have the baby by yourself and have a wonderful life. |
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Bonsylar
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In America, to get a baby away from it's mother, you have to prove she's unfit.
Meaning she's harming/not protecting or neglecting the child, or doesn't have the means to provide a roof, food, clothing and medical care.
So, right now, you need a lawyer.
You need to apply for Welfare and other programs for women and children, and you need a stable place to live.
Don't let him sign the certificate. Make HIM sign over his rights now so you don't have this awful man attached to you for the rest of your life. |
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Wheels always turning
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as soon as you have the baby on the birth certificate state father unknown, change your last name. NY state says if no custody papers are filed, either parent can basically take off with the child. he sounds crazy. thats what i would do. def. talk to a lawyer. |
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