Shouldn't someone tell her we want to adopt her? Isn't it her right to know we are here?

MamaKate

Dear Ms. S.,

Depending on the state you living in, it may be indeed possible to adopt her as an adult. You DO NOT NEED A HOMESTUDY/CLASSES to adopt an adult.

Adult adoptions are generally done for inheritance or medical purposes and are handled through probate Court. (And occasionally to "adopt back" a blood relative.) Most places that allow adult adoptions merely require the consent of the parties (and sometimes their spouses).

You will need to check your local statutes or speak to the clerk of probate court about the procedure in your area. (Many places even have down-loadable DIY paperwork.) You can also hire a probate attorney to handle it.

As for getting in touch with the girl, call the agency who had her in their custody and ask to speak to her case worker. Explain what you want and ask if they can forward the message that you want to extend this opportunity to this young lady and your contact information. Most social workers would be GLAD to do so. Nobody WANTS to see kids age out of foster care without a family!

Please remember that adoption is PERMANENT - even when it is an adult and that this is something ALL of you are able to commit to. If she is interested, take it slow! I think it is wonderful that you want to help this young woman transition into adulthood and be her family! Good luck to all of you!

http://www.adoptingback.com/index.html (has links to adult adoption procedure by state)
http://adopting.adoption.com/child/adopting-an-adult.html

Heather R

As frustrated as you are, the fact of the matter is, rules are rules. Perhaps you can talk to the agency that runs the website and see if the rules are different when the child involved is actually a legal adult.

Why are you unable to take the classes and complete the homestudy? It's very sweet that your heart is so big that you want to help young adults, but if you need to complete a homestudy, then why not start on it now?

sam22254

Contact CPS and I bet you will get a lot of names. Most of these people here don't see really what happens to these young Lady's that are not smart enough for college or think that they would be better off working. I will tell you most of them move in with men because they can support their self's. Some one that would take them in is wonderful GOD BLESS YOU and YOUR Family. Also most of the become mothers right away. They are just wanting someone to love them.

Randy B

Well, as you point out, I can't see why you would need classes to adopt an adult but then again since she is an adult she shouldn't be in the program you are looking to adopt through anyway.

If she has just turned 19 then chances are they are just lazy in their website housekeeping since she should have been out of the system at 18. Keep at it if you wish but I really think that you are barking up the wrong tree with this quest.

And as to why she shouldn't be made aware of someone who wanted to adopt her (regardless of age), the reason is simple...you have not been approved yet and could be excluded at any time in the process until you are approved. The policy is simple and straight forward and the process is there to be followed. You complete the classes, you do the rest of the process and then IF you are approved they go ahead and look at making a match. The match does not just happen because you look at some photos or a website and choose someone. There is much more to it then that and it works that way for a reason.

crzymmof8

Legally they cannot tell her. Due to adoption law you have to have all of the classes done and back ground checks done so that they know you are a safe environment to place a child. I know it is hard but wouldn't you want to know that if your child was going somewhere they were thoroughly checked out?

littlelori

I don't understand why you would want to adopt an adult. Why can't the young lady just live with you as part of your family without the adoption process?

Once your home study and stuff is completed they will tell her and you will get to meet her. In my state if you are adopting a child from foster care they move slowly like a visit this week then a visit then one over night then a week so on till they stay with you permently then there is still 30 days till the adoption is finalized.

There is a reason that they don't tell her because they just can't let her go with anyone. Yes technically she is an adult but she may still be in highschool and many states keep them in custody till 21. This helps them transition to adult hood because they are not adopted.

icehockeymom7

You have to have a home study to adopt, that's just the way it is. That is in place to protect children. There are so many teenagers who need loving families, so I hope you will reconsider taking the classes! There is a huge need for people with room in their hearts for a teenager.

sizesmith

Yes, the classes are time consuming and a pain to get to, however, you can request that they be taught closer to you, especially if you get more people to take them, and it is possible for you to take them one set, and your husband the next.

Also, ask the social worker if she/he can deliver a message to the child, and tell the adult child you'd like to adopt them. That might work, and they wouldn't have the privacy issues that way. Also, in some states, taking the courses online is possible. I learned a lot in the courses, and really recommend them.

'Insert name here'

It is highly unlikely you will be able to adopt her. First of all at 19 she is too old to be adopted although you may be able to foster her, secondly you wouldn't have your homestudy and everything else completed in time.

gary s

My parents did foster care from 1981 to 2004 and got licensed for adoption that way.My parents had four of their own and we adopted the granddaughter of some former neighbors after her parents were denied custody for child abuse.She's had a hard time fitting in as there is a 10 year gap between her and the youngest.I moved out shortly after the adoption.For every child my parents wanted to adopt,there were obstacles.Our first 3 kids were black in our caucasian family,and didn't know what a zoo was like,or a movie theatre.Their mothers neglected them,but we were told that we could not teach them about their "Racial Heritage",if adoption occured.Don't forget that many others want to give a child a home too.And they are already licensed.The child has to pick you out as well.

LadyCatherine

Shouldn't someone be given the option as an adult child of an opportunity to be adopted???

because there has to be an age limit.. if not then 25 year olds and 30 year old would be looking for family's..

try contacting the people that run the web site, they might be able to find her..

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