Survey: Which would you be more likely to donate money for?

jandismommie

The adoptive family because I know there are many programs that can help the natural family in poverty and there isn't any programs that I know of that help for adoption. Also because I know that giving the adoptive family money means I am helping them start a family they couldn't have on there own.

LaurieDB

The family in poverty.

kim h

The natural family in poverty.

Freckle Face

Hi MamaKate,

The natural family in poverty!

Adoption is not a charity.

~*MARi3*~

A natural family in poverty

monkeykitty83

Of the two options, I would donate the money to the poor family trying to provide for their newborn. However, I am wary of just flat out donating money to strangers, and so I would prefer to do something like give them diapers, food, baby stuff, furniture, etc., or help them out with childcare.

If a couple is choosing private adoption of an infant, they're doing it to fill their own desires for a baby, not because the child is in need. People pay tens of thousands of dollars and wait months or years to adopt these babies; the infants aren't at risk of being left without families. Even when they genuinely need a placement away from the biological family, they aren't lacking for people who want them. I'm not going to say it's wrong for prospective adoptive parents to adopt a newborn for no reason other than their own desires, but I don't think others have a responsibility to provide the things we just WANT.

I'd rather help provide for a family in NEED than help another family with their wants.

Sly

I would donate money to families that are in need to keep their natural family together.

Camira B

A natural family in poverty, most definitely.

Nurse Autumn Intactivist NFP

Family in poverty. I would never give money for a family to adopt, I wouldn't even attend a baby shower for PAP's unless they were adopting from Foster Care

BOTZ

A natural family in poverty!

Natural family in poverty = A family in NEED
Prospective adoptive family = A family (more likely a couple) in WANT

I'm not interested in funding other adults WANTS. And, no, I won't buy for an instant that it is a want (much less a need) for the whole family. I was a child in a PAFamily. I was the youngest at the time. My parents constantly told us/me that the adoption of another child was for MY benefit -- so I would have a playmate. Even so, I did NOT want my family to adopt again. I was against it at age 8. Still am.

I would much rather help other adults with their NEEDS -- especially when there is ALREADY a child there, sharing those needs, and for the purpose of keeping that child/those children WITH their natural family.

There are many, many ways to help a natural family in need while ensuring that the 'donation' (not necessarily money) is used for purposes that one deems 'worthy'. At the end of the day, even with the problems that a parent may have or the 'unworthy' things that a parent *might* choose to spend some of my donation on, I'd rather help out anyway. My personal feeling is that a donation with "strings attached" is to my detriment. Even parents with addictions/ bad habits/ occasional lapses in judgement LOVE their kids. I'll take my chances on helping!

Interesting Q, thanks for asking.

Andraya

The family living in poverty, in fact I just donated a ton of baby things to a woman who was contemplating adoption and decided to parent. She hadn't bought anything since she didn't think she would need it so I agreed to give her all my daughter's baby things and am asking around to find boy clothes.

Kazi

If these were my 2 options than I would go with the first.

Rainia W

Well, in this situation, I would probably go for the natural family in poverty. In my view, they need the most assistance between the two. Not that I wouldn't want to help both, but I am assuming this is one or the other kinda question, so I would go for the impoverished family.

tish

i'll take door number 1, kate..

Jessica S **due 1/4/10**

I'd rather donate to the family in poverty...IF they were actually trying to better themselves. If it was a family who just didn't want to get off their butts and work, then I'd give it to the people who want to adopt.

Mom to Foster Children

Easy - A family in poverty!

Gaia Raain

Natural families.

Been there, done that. Never once gave money to PAP's, unless you count myself. Never would, either.

littleamylouise

I would donate to the first family. If the adopting family needs extra support they shouldn't be adopting.

grapesgum

I would and do support low income families who are trying to keep their families intact through monthly donations to a day care center and residence for teen mothers and their children. The day care center is for low income working families. The residence provides parenting training, education, and job training.

I would never, ever donate to private infant adoption because to do so would perpetuate the corruption in the adoption industry. I would view it as funding closed birth records. No way.

Pd S

It depends, you didn't state if the adoptive family is lower class or not. If they are equal, I vote for the poverty family because the baby is already here and needs items now.

furtherfr0mtruth

A natural family in poverty who is raising money to provide for their newborn. Because they are in poverty they need it more. More than likely the prospective adoptive family is somewhat wealthy or else an adoption agency would not allow them to adopt.

natalie_edmonds

i would donate to the family in poverty because i think it is important to try to prevent family breakdown which would result in less children going into the system. if the prospective family arent stable enough they wont be allowed the child any way

Sofiakat

I would only donate to a natural family in poverty if it were to be used for the education of the parents so they could get better jobs and pull themselves out of poverty.

Sophie

Both.

For the natural family part, go to kiva.org... there are many struggling families in developing countries who are trying to make a living with their own businesses... and just need a little loan that will get repaid. I donate to Guatemalan families because that's where my son was born.

For the adoption part, I've notarized documents for FREE for adoptive parents. If any adoptive parents asked for money, I would say no, but I'd offer my odds and ends junk that they could sell at yard sales or give them links to some secret shopper jobs that I did while obtaining money for the adoption expenses.

Timo

It would depend a lot on why the family was in poverty. If the parents wouldn't try to get work, for example, I'd favor getting the child out of the household over providing a crutch.
Maybe this sounds harsh, but I see things like this in my work all the time.

Indian-vision

Neither if possible. But if i could have a word with the natural family and get their promise that "money" is the ONLY compelling reason . I may pick them. A PAP must work out the money aspect all by themselves.

Lexie

Probably 2

sweet kacey

Both

bugitz0223

Like you said, I wouldn't donate to either, but for the sake of answering your question: I would donate to the prospective adoptive family IF they didn't have any children, and couldn't have any children. Reason is that the family in poverty was fortunate enough to have the most wonderful thing in the world absolutely free - a child. They can get basics of life - such as food, medical care, shelter and clothing from DES and other agencies, as well as working.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: