To adoptees...?
Find answers to your legal question.
To adoptees...?
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does it piss anybody off other than me to get on here and listen to peoples check lists of what they are looking for in a child? i want a girl, i want a boy, i want a kid with brown hair and blue eyes, does anybody think that they should just get what they get just like us? does anyone but me feel like we don't get to choose so why should they? I just feel so cheap litening to people talk about adopting kids as if they were shopping for choths. does anyone else feel like that?
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Isabel A
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Yes. It really pisses me off.
Children are people, not things to be bought and sold.
This is not the baby store and people should not get to pick and choose what they want.
Adoption is supposed to be finding the right home for a child not finding the perfect accessory for a want to be parent. It's disgusting.
I have two children and I never once hoped they would have any particular physical trait. And I didn't care what gender they were. Some things we don't get to choose. |
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Possum
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Yep - it REALLY pisses me off.
GREAT question. |
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concerned
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I'm not an adoptee but I hate this practice, too. It made me FEEL like I was carrying a commodity, not a precious human being, when I was pregnant and reading profiles of potential adoptive parents. It made me so incredibly mad--I mean I loved my daughter ALREADY with all my heart, and thought she was perfect even in utero (WITHOUT even knowing yet she was a girl, let alone anything else about her)... and would have given my left arm to raise her... and yet here were these people daring to say, in essence, "We're not that interested in your kid because of x,y,z reason"?????????? I just thought it was awful.
And Fl-girl, you're incorrect, there are no laws in any states preventing biological parents from choosing adoptive parents on the basis of race. The biological parents are the PARENTS of the children at birth, and they have every right to decide who they are going to entrust their child's care to, for ANY reason. There ARE laws preventing social workers from considering adoptive parents' races when placing a child from foster care, but that's a completely different matter, as the social workers aren't the parents of the children and the parents have had their rights terminated due to unfitness. For heaven's sake, PLEASE don't give incorrect information out. |
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mlassi65
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It boils down to a shopping list for children and treating them as a commodity. What happens if perfect baby get an illness/injury makes them less perfect? Do they get given back? Quote from my amom "its too late to give you back" |
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in COGNITO *
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the law (at least in my state) prohibits b-parents from selecting or not selecting a-parents based on race, yet a-parents are given a check list of hundres of characteristics to chose from. How's that fair or right? When (actually before)my son was I knew I would accept him NO MATTER WHAT! My son may have a flawed body, but that's just the what houses his soul. He's perfect!!! |
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Elizabeth
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well i was adopted and my adoption story is a very long weird one, and when my mom tells it she always says "her" so that kinda bothers me because i do have a name. and i mean we didn't get to pick the parents so why should they get to pick the child?? |
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redpeach_mi
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i have never felt that way. i just laugh at how dumb they are if they really think that they are going to be able to "hand pick" a baby. |
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 Can my friend have a baby for me? |
| my husband and i have been trying to have a baby for 3 1/2 years now. my best friend and her husband said they would love to have a baby for us. is this legal? i mean can they get pregnat and give ... |
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 Why adoption so under utilized? |
| I wonder why so many couples often forget the adoption in the scheme of attempting to conceive. It is often seen as the last ditch effort on having a family.... |
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 Raising my younger sister...help? |
| I've been taking care of my little sister for that past 3 years, and she is now 10 (I'm 21) . I sometimes find it hard to be mom and big sister. She doesn't like it when I have to ... |
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 APs do you agree (PAPs too)? |
| I don't understand how what another is called, dictates what "I" am to my son. I am still mom, and so is she. You could call her "good mom" without taking away that I too can ... |
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 If a natural mother is afraid to say they changed their mind while in a pre-birth selection process...? |
How do you think they will handle other major decisions that may need to be made during the child's life?
This question refers to my pre-birth options that women have in the USA- not ... |
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 Oh No should i do this.. ? |
Theres this Little kid in my neighborhood and he is homeless i dont know what happened should i adopt him or like take him to an adoption center. Serious Answers Please.
No mean comments . this ... |
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 I am being adopted????????? |
| I am a 14 (will be 15 in 3 weeks) year old girl and I have been in foster care since I was 11 because my mum could not take care of me. I have been in 7 home and I was finally put up for adoption 1 ... |
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 What do you think about this? ? |
| I know there isn't a anything one can do to make up for the loss of ones parent, especially through abuse and neglect. What do you think of the idea of having some kind of Foster Kid Club. OF ... |
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 What to know what everyone thinks about becoming a surrogate mother, OR if you have any advice for me.? |
| I have been look for information about become a surrogate mother and I need some advice or just some general help finding out some more information. I would love to help another family if I can but ... |
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 Considering adoption. I'd like to be a mom!? |
| I cannot conceive naturally and have thought about adopting. The process intimidates me a bit because the agency does a check on your background. I am concerned that there will be a question about ... |
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| Iam pregnat and wanting to adopt dose any one know of a good agencey or some one wanting to adopt privitely? |
iam 21 and 7mos pregnat i am wanting to adopt to give my child an opprotunity at a better life than I had i have tried sevreal agencies but none I liked I was wondering if some one
knew of a ... |
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 Where do u start when u don't have answers to a closed adoption? |
| Im adopted. I was a closed adoption.IM 27 years old living in texas all my life. I found out I was adopted at the age of 15. I was devasted cuz I had no clue. That explains me being born in Stuttgart,... |
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 Should it hurt this bad? |
| Alright, when I was a 20 a 19 yr old friend of mine couldn't take care of her kid at birth so she "gave" her to me. Being smart, knowing i was young and still materialistic with no ... |
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 What do Bio Parents want from reunion? |
I have "hung around" here for a month or so trying to work out if I should meet my bio mum I know where she lives and have written a letter but I dont know if I should post it.
T... |
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 How do I know when I am ready to contact my first mom? |
I think I found her but I just can't bring myself to contact her.
I want to so badly, but I am afraid of the ramifications of my actions. Perhaps my adoptive parents will be ... |
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 Do you think it's important to read books, articles, blogs and watch works? |
of people who have radical views of adoption, if anything, to understand the mind set of the person writing it?
I have NOTHING in common with the writer of "fast track adoptions",... |
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 ADOPTEES: what is your opinion about references to birth Mother? |
| I have a friend who has a daughter adopted from Mexico. She was adopted at 10 months. She is now 6. He mother constantly makes references to her birth mother. If they are watching TV and someone is ... |
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 Chance or not? |
Okay, my SIL and i were having a conversation today and i would love to get ur opinions.
i am an adoptive mother of 4 and she is a natural mother of 5. Do u think that birth parents who had ... |
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 How to explain to children who are effected by drugs or alcohol? |
about why they are sick.
How can this be done without demonizing their mothers?
Can children understand that addiciton is an illness?
When is a good age to start talking about ... |
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 AdOpTiOn HeLp? |
| I am planning on adopting a baby from russia in the future and was wondering if when you adopt you have to keep the name they gave the baby or if you can name it yourself.... |
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No Spam
Adult 
Gambling
Unfinished
Deception
Plagiarism
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