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What do I have to go through in the adoption process?
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What do I have to go through in the adoption process?

If im thinking about adopting a child, what do i have to do or go through before the child is completely mine?
Please give a step be step and/or give details thanx!!!


To be "completely mine"?

You'd better give birth, because that's the ONLY way a child is completely yours.

All adopted children have another, original family. All the money and laws in the world can't erase that reality.

Dan B.
you should do your own reasearch, then you would know that the kid you want wont ever really be yuors.
kids are their own people, no one belongs to someone else, esp. adopted kids.

A child is a human being not a possession therefore will never be completely yours as they will always have two families - yours and they natural family.

Research your options first before you decide which direction you go in.

Try reading:
The Primal Wound - Nancy Verrier
Coming Home to Self - Nancy Verrier
The Girls Who Went Away - Ann Fessler

farm mom of 10
Here are the steps you go through to do a foster adoption. That's the only kind I know:


Here's an overview of the process:

Educate yourself and your family members.
Decide what type of adoption you want pursue.
Investigate ways to handle adoption expenses.
Select an adoption agency/facilitator and/or attorney.
Complete an agency application form.
Begin the homestudy process.
Attend pre-adoption and parenting classes.
Be matched with or locate a child.
Prepare for your child's arrival.
File a petition to adopt.
Finalize the adoption.
Post-adoption services and education.

By "completely mine" do you mean legally a member of your family? Because no child will ever belong completely to its parents, adoptive or otherwise.

I think instead of completely mine, you were meaning legally yours.

Education is the number one thing, so that way, you're prepared for what will happen in the future.

First, there are several types of adoptions. There is private, where you know the mother and go through an attorney. There is foster-to-adopt, where you go through your local offices and they pay for courses, home study, etc, and there are agency adoptions where you pay the agency for the processes such as home study, finding a child to adopt, etc. There's also international adoption, but I'm not going to go there, and don't agree with it in some cases.

Finding a child to adopt is the hardest part for most of us. You MUST have a home study on 99% of adoption in the US (I think there's a few exceptions, such as family adoption). The home study must be kept updated annually, until you adopt.

In many cases, both through the state, and for many agencies, you'll have to attend parenting courses designed for adoption. During the time of taking the courses, there is much paperwork to be done, usually provided by the social worker doing your home study. There are things like criminal background checks, reference letters and much more to be done. If you're doing private adoption, there are workers who do homestudies that often "moonlight" from health departments and mental health clinics in your local area. Our home study worker normaly works in a juvenille therapy place.

Once you are matched, through private adoption, the 1st parents sign the consent forms, which your attorney will file in court, and within a short period of time, there will be a court hearing which basically gives you legal rights to sign for medical treatments, and other parental duties. It's different through the state, because chances are, you'll foster to adopt, where the child lives with you for a while during the time of which the parental rights are terminated, and the steps taken for the state to legally give you adoption rights, and then again, you'll go to court for the pre-adoptive hearing.

There is a waiting time between the pre-adoptive hearing, and your final adoption decree. Ours was 6 months. Other states are 3 months, and through the state it can take MUCH longer.

In a perfect world, children would only be born to those who love them, when the time is right, and to everyone who wants them. Unfortunately, it's not a perfect world, and there are children who are not wanted, others who are placed for financial reasons, and yet others who are abused and neglected. The adoption process is long, requires patience, love, understanding, and most of all, the realization that there are losses in the child's life. We must all work to make the process better on the first parents, because we must acknowledge how they got to a point of placing, or having their children taken away, and remember, that without them, we adoptive parents would never be parents.

Ignore the pissy peoples answers. They've got their own "anti adoption" issues to deal with.

Contact your local social services or child welfare agency.

Go to an adoption orientation.

Start attending MAPP meetings

Gather together all the paperwork your caseworker tells you you'll need (drivers license, social security card, vehicle registration, title, proof of residency, marriage/divorce papers, paycheck stubs, etc).

You'll have a homestudy. Caseworkers will come to your home and make sure it's safe for a child (fire extinguishers, smoke detectors, escape plan, sharp/dangerous objects put away, etc).

You'll get a physical, TB test, background check and be fingerprinted.

Once you've been approved and are certified you simply wait for a child to be placed with you. It could take a few days to 6 months if you go through foster care.

Virtually free going through the foster system as well.

After 6 months of having the child live with you, you'll be allowed to officially adopt him/her. Names will change, new birth certs and social security # issued, adoption papers signed - done!

If you are interested in adoption, the first thing you’ll want to do is contact an adoption agency or adoption lawyer to help you in the process. In some states you need both an adoption agency and lawyer to get the process completed. You’ll want to ask about the specific laws in your state. Because adoption is actually a legal process, most people cannot navigate the adoption waters on their own. Having a qualified individual helping you along the way will be a tremendous comfort. If you do go with an adoption agency, be sure of their practices and always protect yourself first and foremost. Many people fail to sign a contract and get things in writing, only to end up losing money and find themselves with less money and still no child. Never, ever give an agency or individual money without doing a background check, contacting the better business bureau and checking their references. It may be tempting to give someone money to help put a child you’re your arms, but you should always check out the agencies track record before you put any trust in them.

Frank G
If im thinking about adopting a child, what do i have to do or go through before the child is completely mine?
Please give a step be step and/or give details thanx!!!

These people are very cold. A child that you take care of completely on your own, and you love completely, will be completely yours, after you work out the legalities of it all. Look for an adoption attorney in your area. The Department of Social Services in your state can help you.

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