What do you think of this response to the NCFA re. protecting privacy of first mothers?

gypsywinter

I cannot say clear enough nor loud enough, for the god knows how many times...I DO NOT WANT NCFA ACTING AS MY MOUTHPIECE! I never asked them nor invited them in any way to do so. NCFA DOES NOT Speak for me! I am quite old enough to speak for myself, as well as my now very adult daughter, who I am reunited with. They need to butt the F**K OUT! out of matters that concern ADULTS! I was never promised nor guaranteed privacy in any way by LCFS, in 1964. For far too long the adoption industry (with it's minions and cohorts) has enjoyed THEIR PRIVACY, by insisting it was for the 'greater good' that surrendering mothers never speak of 'this' again. They are the ones that are trying to 'guarantee' that their secrets and lies will not be open to public inspection. This land mass that America sits upon today, by all accounts, should not even be in existence by the sheer number of fires, floods, earthquakes, mudslides, tornadoes, hurricanes, asteroids, flying saucers, etc., that have destroyed records at adoption agencies, hospitals and maternity homes!! If adoption was such an above board and honest practice...why is the NCFA so desperately trying to keep records closed for 100 years? Protecting the surrendering mother?.....BS! They are covering their own asses and for many reasons that many a surrendering mother already knows, but who so many do not want to believe. The NCFA and it's supporters do not want The Truth to be unveiled, as written in their own words! The greatest majority of Closed Era Mothers are locked out of their own records. WHY? Will they tell us they are protecting us from ourselves??

Flying Monkey #073177

Any time I hear of a first mom speaking out against the myths of adoption I get all goosebumpy. If sealed records were about protecting first parent privacy why are they still sealed today when so many adoptions are open? My son lived with me for two years, I've met his adoptive parents and my legal name is all over his documents. Why would I need privacy? His records are still sealed, in the exact same way as any closed adoption from the BSE.

Freckle Face

Dear Carol,

I applaud her for speaking out against the NCFA. If indeed the agenda is to protect the privacy of first mothers then I believe the voices we should listen to would be FIRST MOTHERS. Just a thought.

SJM

Unlike the NCFA's statement, this is based on fact.

The NCFA knows that there is no "right to privacy" for relinquishing parents, yet they continue to perpetuate the myth of their own creation. There is also no promise of confidentiality. If one were to be made, it would be fraudulent. I learned my mother's name from my adoptive parents who handed me a copy of my adoption papers. Yes, the records are sealed, but they obtained a copy at the time the adoption was finalized. It is perfectly legal for them to share that information with me. How can confidentiality or even a "right to privacy" be assumed when adoptive parents are provided this information?

Sealed records exist for the sole purpose of preventing adoptees from obtaining their own vital records without their adoptive parents' permission. The NCFA knows this, and their arguments have been dismissed. Yet, they continue to bark up the same barren tree.

MamaKate

Dear Carol,

I enjoyed reading Ms. Bahr's reponse and I agree with it wholeheartedly. I have yet to meet a first parent who was given a promise of confidentiality or privacy from their child. Sealing adoption records is even more ridiculous when one considers that the idea is basically that a third party is given the right to dictate this concept without the input of ALL of the parties involved - namely the adoptee.

Sealed records are exceptionally insulting in cases of "open" adoption where the families KNOW one another and serves NO PURPOSE other than to REDUCE THE RIGHTS of the adoptee.

It sickens me that legislators do not listen to FPs and adoptees on this matter. It shows who they are truly representing...

amyburt40

I think it is great. I am extremely thankful for the mothers who do speak out against the atrocities that happen in adoption

kitta

It cannot be said often enough: Surrendering a child does NOT alter that child's original birth certificate.

Only the adoption of that child, which is the action of the adoptive parent and the gov't does that.

Bahr should have said that. Natural mothers don't change birth certificates nor seal records.

When parents surrender their children they relinquish custody and parental rights. They retain the normal rights of privacy that ALL American citizens retain, those rights that the 4th Amendment to the Constitution gives everyone.

If the surrendered child is never adopted then the birth certificate is never changed and the child can of course find the mother.THe surrendered by not-adopted child still has the name of the mother.The original birth certificate is the child's birth certificate.

Some surrendered children grow up in foster care. Some grow up in institutions, some with relatives.

Two big agency supporters of NCFA are LDS and Bethany Christian. THese agencies are fighting to keep the real birth certificates sealed and issue only the fake ones.

LDS, I know, does not believe it is morally right for single parents to raise their children.They will continue to promote adoption and will not support children being raised by their single mothers or fathers.

NCFA wants anonymity for mothers so that adoptive parents can believe they are the 'real" and only parents.

There is no promise of "anonymity"......and privacy, which is real, should not be confued with anonymity.

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: