What do you think of this statement?

The Pirate Alien

Love is love, no matter who it comes from.

I believe it is false. First, like many people have said, not all natural mothers love their children. That can be seen on the news as we hear many reports of mothers killing and or beating their own children, we see that in the books we read about abused children, and we see it in the foster homes filled with kids who cannot return home for it is to dangerous.

Then again, true, not all adoptive parents turn out to be roses and daises. Some have equally abused their adoptive child for various reasons.

But that only proves one thing, a bad person is a bad person. Regardless of if they were natural parents or adoptive parents, some people are just mean.

This of course can be reversed. I love my daughter with all my heart, even though she is not yet born. Yet I know that the adoptive family I have chosen loves her already as well, and will continue to love her just as strongly as I will through out the years.

Love can come from anyone and be just as strong regardless of who the person is. My own mom would give her life for me, and I know my daughters adoptive mother will give her life for her, even though they are not blood.

So simply, it doesnt matter the relationship between people, or what their classification is. People can be bad and good, and anyone can love passionately.

Lori A

hmmm, how to explain. My daughters mother loves her like her own daughter, because she is her daughter. I love my daughter like she is an appendage, a part of me, something that grew from me. I do believe the two are different. I do not mean to say that my love is better, deeper, stronger, just different.

monkeykitty83

It depends on how it's meant. No one else will experience carrying and birthing the child, and the physical bonding that accompanies it, so to that degree, yes. If it implies that the love of adoptive parents is LESS, though, I disagree. So it depends if the statement uses "the way" to mean "not in the exact same manner as" (which I agree with,) or "not as much as" (which I don't agree with.)

An attachment formed through adoption may be DIFFERENT than a biological bond, but that doesn't make it weaker, or less real or valid. Adoptive and biological parents are both capable of loving a child with all their hearts.

MamaKate

Does everyone love the "same"?

Personally, I think everyone is different and that we each love differently in our own ways.

The thing is, love is love. One love is not "better" than another.

cantstopLinnyG

Well, my Mom adopted me, my brother and then had my sister. Does she love us all equally? Of course she does. But she has a "different" type of love/bond with my sister. How could she NOT? She is biologically a part of her, as my sister is to her.

My sister knew and loved our mother BEFORE she was born. It's scientific FACT that a newborn knows his or her natural mother. Her face, her voice, her reactions, her heartbeat, etc, etc.

While I love my Mom, I also love my N Mom. They both have different roles in my life. Even after being separated for 22 years, I knew my N Mom's reactions, as she did mine.

Just like that poem, "Legacy of the adopted child" goes...it's a DIFFERENT kind of love.

â™¥â™¥Mum To Superkidsâ™¥â™¥

I think it's true. A natural mother has a certain kind of love for her child that is different to the love their other parents may feel.

Note I said different, not better or worse.

Princess

I think in some situations this is true because you had that extra 9-10 months with the baby.

rachael

its not true or false. its a different type of love.

yes, love is love, but not all love is the same. i love my aparents because they are my parents. they raised me, loved me and gave a darn good life.
i love my bparents because they are a part of me. an extension of my own being.

neither is better or worse, neither is right or wrong. just different.

EDIT...i just read the other answers for the first time. i am laughing at Lori A's answer. talk about share a brain!!
for anyone that doesnt already know-i am Lori A's daughter she relinquished 36 years ago. i just found it amusing how alike our answers were.

grapesgum

I believe that no one can love a child "like" a natural mother can. The biological link is undeniably too strong.

That said, I do not think that an adoptive mother can love her child "less" than a natural mother. The nurturing link is undeniably too strong.

Gaia Raain II

No one, on the face of this Earth, could EVER "love" me exactly the same way my mother "loves" me. #1, no one else gave birth to me. No one else shared a body with me. No one else did drugs while I was in her womb. No one else beat me quite like my own mother. No one else has ever matched her vindictiveness or spite. I've never met another person who could turn on the charm quite like my mother, and then turn around and beat the holy hell out of a tiny child in a span of seconds.

I have no doubt that my mother believes she loves me. But her brand of love is conditional, and based on controlling everything around her. Others have "loved" me in a similar manner, but not not quite the same way as dear ol' mom.

It is true. No two loves are exactly the same. No one could ever "love" me the same as my own mother. That doesn't mean that others' love doesn't feel better to me. It's just not the same brand. That very "special" variety of Mom Love can only come from her.

Whatever relationship (or lack thereof) that you have with your mother (the one who gave birth to you), no one else on the face of this Earth could possibly do it exactly the same.

icehockeymom7

The reason this statement is so hard for me is that I read it and make the assumption that it means an adoptive mom cannot love her child *as much* as the child's natural mom can. And of course, I don't agree with that. I have both bio and adopted children, and I don't love my bio children more than my adopted child. But the statement does not actually say a natural mom loves her child *more*, so I should not make that assumption. Truthfully, a mother loves all of her children equally, but has different bonds with each of them. I do believe it is a very immediate and natural bond for bio parents and babies (at least that was my experience with my newborns, I know there are some women who do not feel that). It's just the way we were made....we are hard-wired to bond with that baby in the womb and to feel immediately connected at birth. When we adopted our daughter, she was not a baby, she was a 2 1/2 year old toddler. So while I had fierce love for her immediately (like lay-down-my-life-for-her kind of love) it did take some time to feel totally bonded with her. After all, I didn't know her! She was her own little person and we had to get to know each other. I had the immediate maternal instincts to protect her and love her, and I loved her just as much as my other children. It just took some time for that bond to form, and for us to feel completely connected. If her natural mother were to have kept her at birth, she probably would have had that instant bond with her. I do often wonder if her natural mother were to have come to the orphanage and claimed her at age 2 1/2, would that bond have been instant or would it have been the same as it was with me? Instant love, but not necessarily instant bonding. I don't know if I am explaining myself well, because when I read what I am typing it sounds as if I did not love my adopted daughter instantly. That's not true and I would never, ever want her to feel that. The love was instant, the bond took some time.

Helena B

they will, but its not the same. an adoptive mum is a stranger at 1st& the baby knows it.

Emily

Not true.
The natural mother is the mother who cares the child while they grow up. They offer support and love.
The biological mother is the one who has the child and is not the natural mother.

AdoreHim

I disagree with this completely. My adopted parents loved me as much as if they had me biologically. I know that the birth moms of my 2 adopted children, loved them, absolutely- but I can tell you the moment that those babies were in our arms, they were ours, and were and still our loved BECAUSE THEY ARE OURS.

nutterorsaintuchoose

total crap ... its just not true lots of family don't get the chance to have a natural child and they love the children they adopted .. wot a silly thing for any one to come out with ...
my mother was so bloody nasty if that's love keep it some people just make crap parents and still go on to have several children and all end up with other mums + dads .... look at all the dads bringing up other men's children ask them ...

Lea

I don't agree with it I have four children and they came in to my life different ways. One I gave birth to one is a step son and two where adopted. I love them all the same. Not one more then the other.

ladedamom

Total and complete BS.
My son is adopted and his biological mother made it very clear she didn't want him, didn't want to see him and didn't want to know anything about him later on. She was adamant. The first time I held him as a baby in my arms I was in love. Children are not always born into the families they are meant to be with. Just because you birth the child doesn't mean you are fit to parent the child.
This statement also implies that adoptive parents aren't real parents. That in itself is offensive because as an adoptive mom I can assure you I am the REAL mom.

John

I think it is like so true cause their is like nobody like your birth mother is if she like didn't love you she'd like abort you instead of like giving you like life.

poohgirl

In the majority of situations it is true, which is why its a damn shame that people give away their children. Babies need their real mothers. period.

leila

I've known lots of natural mothers who abused and neglected their kids so I am not sure whether or not that is true.

Veronica

lol.

fake.

i have seen a lot of natural mothers treat their kids like gum under a shoe.

Julia

its not always true cause some people are alcohalics and drug addicts

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