What the heck do I tell this Attorney?

I had to write to the agency and APs attorney to get an extension for my appeal brief. I need to write her back and know what to write for most of it. I have no response for this part though, mostly because it somehow hurt my feelings without being rude. How would you respond if you were me?

"At this juncture, you may wish to consider bringing peace and conclusion to this very difficult and unhappy situation. Mr. and Mrs. ______ remain ready to enter into some form of reasonable open adoption agreement with you, and potentially with Mr. _________, that they believe will best meet the needs of ________ (they changed Decklan's name) and of their family and which will provide you with some level of communication and information. We do not believe that you will prevail in this appeal or that Mr. _________ will successfully intervene in the Oregon adoption. Further litigation by you and by Mr. _______ will only strain relations beyond repair and is in no ones best interests."
Additional Details
I don't have an appeals attorney and so any communication goes between me and their attys.

Heather B

How's this:

"At this juncture, you may wish to consider bringing peace and conclusion to this very difficult and unhappy situation. Mr. and Mrs. ______ should return my child to me and I would be willing to a form of reasonable visitation agreement with THEM, that I believe will best meet the needs of Decklan and of MY family and which will provide THEM with some level of communication and information. I believe that I will prevail in this appeal and that Mr. _________ will successfully intervene in the Oregon adoption."

They're clutching at straws and threatening you.

Please don't give up on your son.

I'm putting myself in your son's shoes and what I feel right now is that if there was any chance at all of me being with my real mother I would want everything possible done to achieve that.

I'm so sorry these people are incapable of doing the right thing and allowing a mother and child to be together. If they succeed in holding him hostage, it will backfire on them later, guaranteed. I can tell you, as an adopted person, if I ever discovered my mother had fought for me, loved and wanted me and my Arents had fought it, they would eat my dust.

Don't ever give up on your baby sweet lady. You're his Momma and he needs you.

Texas granny turtle

It seems they are wanting it over with now. It seems they are trying to get you to back down to what ever they want you to do. Get Legal Aid help if needed. At least they are saying communication and information is still on table. You do not say why you are appealing. It is your right to do so. You really need legal help with something this large. I don't even know how they can change child's name if adoption is not complete also. Call any lawyer for Legal Aid information. Also keep a record file and copys of any letter you send to them.

Kristin Pregnant with #4

Are you trying to back out of an adoption? If so, you need to get a lawyer - you wont win on your own and their lawyer knows it. States have strict regulations on the time frame of getting your child back. Chekc the laws in oregon. if you cant afford a lawyer then have a free consultation with one asap.

know that this couple loves the child as their own and planned on being his parents. If you want your child back thats ok but try to be considerate of the couples feelings as well.

EDIT: I just read your previous questions.. I would contact your lawyer and see what they say you should do. If you wanted your son back the day after you gave him up for adoption, you should have gotten him back by now. i agree with the best answer from your last question: it does say a lot about the AP's.

daisy-jane

Have you contacted either

http://www.origins-usa.com

OR

http://www.adoptioncrossroads.org

They might be able to help.

LaurieDB

Camira, they absolutely want you to just back down. I know that's not what you want to do, though, as you've expressed such in previous posts.

It is their attorney's JOB to get you to either back down or to get the court to rule in his client's favor. So, of course he will write to you in such manner.

You do need to find a way to get legal representation, though. Like it or not, having an attorney greatly increases a person's chances. Contact Legal Aid and see what they can do.

Hang in there. The offer of an "open adoption" if you back down is just a dangling carrot to get you to drop your case. It puts them under no legal obligation to keep the adoption open.

grapesgum

Heather nailed it.

I also suggest that you contact CUB as they have experiences with these kind of standoffs where the wannabe adoptive parents have essentially kidnapped the baby and are hanging on as long as they can, hoping to gain the sympathy of the courts.

http://www.cubirthparents.org/

Good luck - don't let them bully you. There are scaaared - with good reason. Don't fall for their attempts to scam you into an open adoption. As soon as they get your son legally, I guarantee you that they will kick you to the curb.

Freckle Face

Dear Camira,

Don't you just love Heather! Just brilliant. I would actually hand them that paragraph as my response.

They sound scared. I almost take "strain relations beyond repair" as some kind of threat. Back down now or you will never even see a picture of your son.

"Further litigation.....is in no ones best interests". Kindly remind them that it IS in Decklan's best interests to be with his mother!

Keep fighting! Support, hugs, and prayers to you and Decklan.

I Love A Child With Autism!!!

If possible, you need to get an attorney. Perhaps legal aid will be able to help. I am an AP and I have never seen a form like this. This looks like a letter that is being sent to bully you into giving up your child. The attys want you to back down and they are trying to break your confidence. Hold strong!!! Your child is just that...YOUR CHILD. Don't let them get away with this.

Gaia Raain

I'm 100% with Heather B here. I'd also add in that we all know open adoption agreements are not legally binding, so they're offering you essentially NOTHING, when in fact, YOU are the party who should gain from this.

Do not back down. Ever.

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