Who "owns" your identity? You? Your adoptive mother? Your natural mother? The government?

Heather B

My identity doesn't belong to anyone except ME.

The State took my identity and is holding it hostage.

I cannot believe the rubbish people are spewing here like adoption is the witness protection program or something and that adoptees need restraining as if they are a danger to society!

If you substituted the word 'adoptee' for the word 'black' or 'Jew' I think then people would more clearly see the DISCRIMINATION that is taking place here.

PhilM

Apparently the government owns it and has no intention of letting me in on the secret.

Instead of waiting for the government to clue me in, I constructed my own identity over the last thirty some years. None of my parents were able to give me my identity. And the government won't. That left it up to me.

LaurieDB

It depends. In all states, the non-adopted own their own identities. In 44 states, the state owns the identities of adopted citizens. But, despite the attitude of the state, I have created a legal and familial scenario that allows me to own my own identity.

This isn't something that will make sense to non-adopted persons. I don't expect it to, but I would also ask that it not be dismissed. Thanks much.

eta:
I've noticed some people answering the question as though it were "Who owns me?" But, the question is "Who 'owns' your IDENTITY?" Yes, I personally believe wholeheartedly that God owns me (my spiritual belief) but the state has chosen to "own" my LEGAL IDENTITY under the LAW in my state.

amyburt40

The state of Indiana owns mine. I am desparately still seeking my own identiy. I have not figured myself out.

private

You legally assume the name of your adoptive parents.
When you turn 18, and become legal, you can go to court,
and have it changed.
When you join the military. You still have your name, but you
are then "government property."
If you go to prison. You become just another "number." <}:-})

Freckle Face

I own my identity. My children own their each individual identities.

Whoa, i see this question is way deeper than i can think about at midnight.

Great question!

The government owns you. The government can force you to do absolutely anything since the Patriot Act. The Patriot Act works so that all the government has to do to send you to jail is accuse you of being a terrorist. Under the dictatorship of Bush, and thanks to the war, you no longer have "unalienable rights" [Constitution-"We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator, with certain unalienable rights that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness."] That means that you are born with certain rights, [life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.] that cannot be taken away from you, but the Patriot Act allows the government to do just that. So to answer your question, the government owns your identity.

Laurel J

As an adoptee, my identity legally "belongs" to the state. Morally and ethically, of course, it belongs to me.

rachael

i own it, i have developed it for 35 years and have made it all mine. i couldnt fit into my adoptive family, they are great, but i am definitely the odd one. and im ok with that

my biofamily, i found later in life, had much to do with it too. my birthmother and i share a brain usually. that was down right scary when we met and the similarities started to emerge. it still blows my mind almost 9 years later.
biofather, well, not so much personality, but i got his face. again, i say, i am ok with all this.

the government owns the paperwork, your personal invisible trail. they take it and hold it hostage from us. they cover our footprints in the snow-so to speak. its all there, just hidden by their stupid ideals that they force on us.

no one will own me, not because they hold some papers. they may have dibs on my ancestry, but not on me.

???now what???

This is interesting and I looked at some of the answers and it gave me pause to think.

The Bible begins with genealogy and the way they identified everyone was by the names of their fathers. God never said, you're mine, so you don't need to know who your earthly father is. So speaking religiously, it must be of great importance.

Genealogy is also the biggest hobby WORLDWIDE. Therefore, I think it must inherently be of some importance.

One thing that has been prevalent in all dictatorships is that a person's identity is stripped from them. It happens so gradually, that that the populace was unaware that it was happening. First one group, then another. If we don't protect one groups rights, then we are in essence saying, "we're next."

I cannot begin to imagine not knowing who I am. I can't begin to fathom not having that right. I'm glad you asked the question because I really haven't given that any thought.

Bizzi

Government,. over 90% of us who were in foster care have kids, lose them to the government because we were in foster care.

That make any sense to you? I have experienced this myself. I am still trying to make sense of it.. so excuse me...lol....

Crucio

My identity is my own and belongs to me and no one else.

kaluah96

All of the above

Me- because when i turned 25 i decided to become who i was and stop trying to make people happy because it just isn't possible

My Amom- because she tried to sculpt me into something that i wasn't. i always tryed to please her but nothing made her happy. at 25 i gave up.

My Nmom- becuase she is the only one that knows the answers to all my questions. She could tell me what race i am, where i came from, maybe even be able to tell me where i belong. never felt like i fit anywhere even though i can make friends easily.

Government- they won't let me get my medical history. they can look at a piece of paper and find out what race i am and i may spend the rest of my life guessing, my son and i could die of a genetic disease that someone else may just know is in there family and be able to get treated for. i may never know.

i am an adult and my mother still holds on to mine. sometimes i even wonder if i act the way i do becasue it's the exact oppisite of what she wants or if i act like this because this is who i am. i'll be 30 this month.

whatever!

I own my identity!

jgf5822

in my heart, i don't feel i own my identity. sadly, i honestly do not know who does.

janine k

our identity is about the only thing we own in our lives as long as we don't let anyone take it from us

Peaness

The last time I checked I 'own' my identity. As nobody 'owns' me. My name may be a reflection of those that had a hand in raising me.

For those that do not believe that they 'own' themselves shows a reason for concern. Don't let anybody ever 'own' you other than yourself. Make decisions for yourself & OWN up to the choices you make. I realize in life you may be confused & trying to 'find' yourself but always know that you're ultimately responsible for you, your identity & your life.

Emme

I think that owning your identity yourself comes with age and life experience. When you're young, you see yourself mirrored in the adults that have the most impact and influence over your life. You look at yourself through their eyes. As you get older, and you feel more confident and more free to form your own opinions and explore your own thoughts and beliefs, you begin to own your identity. Depending on life experiences, you may become the sort of person who will allow someone else to own your identity, or may give up your power to own your identity to someone else. I think that is why there are so many self help books out there talking about having personal power, and learning who you are. In the case of an adopted person, I think that how your adoption is explained to you, at what age, how much freedom you have to express your feelings on the subject, what help is available with any coping difficulties all go into who owns your identity long term. Someone who lacks information, and can't ask questions may not own their identiy, someone who can ask, explore, question and seek coping tools could own their identity. Children, Minors, Adults - can all own their identities.

badbill1941

If you were adopted, you attain their last name, as I did. You, however, own your identity.

anissia

I don't think any of them know ME at all. so yes I own it!!

katobow

Since I have now met my birth mother my identity belongs to her and me because she answered all the questions I had prior to meeting. I now have a complete sense of who I am. Prior to meeting her I feel that the government owned my identity because I was at their mercy completely.

littleJaina

What do you mean by "owns your identity"? You would first have to define what "Identity" means. Do you mean my name? I don't think anyone can "own" a name. After all, I know two boys who have exactly the SAME name.... I'm not kidding, the same first name, middle name, and last name. They grew up in the exact same little town too (with less than 2000 people in it) and were born within six months of eachother. They actually ended up having to be called "Big Justiin" and "Little Justin" in school because of it. So which one would own the name?

On the other hand, people have auctioned off the right to name themselves on e-bay. In that case, would the company own the name?

I believe the IRS owns your social security number, and the state owns your birth certificate (the certificate of such - since they're the certifying agency. You can be born without a birth certificate, but you can't pove the date without it.)

However, you self identity is obviously owned entirely by YOU, since you make it - and your pictoral image is owned by you unless you sell it to someone, or license it to them (the way some celebreties do).

This question is really too broad. I believe you're trying to say you have the right to know who your parents are - but the fact is that your right to the legal disclosure of their names is just that - a legal decision. You're still allowed to have their genetics, you're still allowed to find your genetic history through DNA tests, you're still allowed to try to find who they were by means other than the state records. The only thing the law stops you from doing is viewing certifications and documents that are protected by the law - and since the state is issuing them, they really belong to the state.

one of a kind

hellz nah my identity belongs to me and the mother birth mother and the government well thats if she is under the help with the government so the identity belongs to meeee!!!! meeee my identity

opedial

No one owns me, my children, or anyone else. We all belong to the Creator (God, or insert Deity of your choice here) and our identity belongs to ourselves. The role of parents is to facilitate the children to become whomever they were meant to become.l

AdoreHim

sorry to disappoint anyone- but no one owns my identity- except God- God is the one that created me, and I belong to Him- through Christ- however, God placed me in my adopted parents home for a reason.

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