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Heather B
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I'm glad it's not everyone's second or third choice.
It's not nice feeling like second or third consolation prize!
ETA: Since another answerer has accused me of 'kicking up a fuss about being second or third choice" I would just like to correct her (because she apparently can't read!) to point out that I said 'It's not a nice FEELING . . . " I'm sick and tired of adoptees being told how they SHOULD feel! geeez |
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♥*BABY#1 DUE ON 8/30/08*♥
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Some people, it takes longer to conceive. They probably thought they couldn't have kids. Well, now they do, and I'm truly happy for both of them! |
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Summer S
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They couldn't have children together.
They suffered two miscarriages while trying. That's why they adopted. |
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chik7896
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Every child needs a home :) |
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Roberta P
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We chose to adopt after having bio kids because we wanted more children. I didn't want a newborn, been there don't want to do it again, but wanted more children. So we chose to adopt a toddler with medical problems. We wanted a child that would have less of a chance to be adopted if we didn't adopt her. We didn't do it to save her but to grow our family. If people think we saved her, well that is their opinion not ours. We are in the process of adopting another toddler with medical problems, all for the same reasons. If I get my way there will be 2 additional toddlers with medical problems joining my family in the next 3-4 years. Just got to get my husband on board.
Again we are not trying to make a rainbow family or save the world, just enlarge our family. |
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Gaia Raain
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I don't know yet whether I can have children. I've been pregnant once, but had a miscarriage before I even knew I was pregnant. I don't care whether I can have biological children, I still want to adopt. My husband and I discussed this for years before starting the process. We want a whole lot more than just a family. We want to be a positive part of others' lives. We're adopting through foster care. Neither of us have any illusions. We're not their first family, and it's not going to be easy. We're not expecting them to feel "grateful" (as I hear some people expect adoptees to feel whether or not they're from foster care). We have no expectations, but we're willing to...no, change that, we WANT TO work really hard to make a difference in some young lives. We are working on making a home-grown baby at present, too. And we have no illusions about how the two (or three) children will interact, either.
Adoption can be a beautiful thing, whether you're infertile or not.
Edit: To clarify the timeline...we started the adoption process 2 years ago, and started trying for a home-grown baby 2 months ago. Adoption is our first choice. We're hoping for both, though. |
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sarahhhhhhh
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Fisrt off I still think its wrong for people to kick up a fuss about being 2nd or 3rd choice. At the end of the day, those are the same people who would kick up a fuss if no kids were being adopted, and were left to grow up in childrens homes etc.
People adopt for all kind of reasons and it doesn make a difference if that person can have bio kids or not. No one should be labled and judged for adopting a child for whatever reason.
If you cant have bio kids then it must be hard, I couldnt imagine being told I couldnt have kids, but atleast adoption is a choice for some people.
Everyone is different and we should respect that. Seems like some people need to get there heads out of their asses and start to face reality!!!
NO ONE should comment in an nasty way about people who cant have kids. Its unjustified. |
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Lillie
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I don't like feeling like a consolation prize, either Heather. And some peeps with their not-so-happy lives ought to just keep their yaps shut. |
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Andrew
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Some folks have enough love in their hearts that they open up their lives and homes to kids who have none. Sounds like a nice thing to me. |
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AdoreHim
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some people have a huge heart and home for the children that may not have homes otherwise. I may be a bit sensitive here, but it kind of sounds like you are saying- adoption is not as important as having your own children. I am wrong about this assumption, aren't I? |
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Reiki Chick
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They adopted children as they weren't able to have children together. There are so many reasons why a woman could not carry a child to term, or become pregnant in the first place -only the two of them and their doctors would know for sure.
But other people often choose to adopt rather than have their own because they believe that with so many children in the world needing a home - its better to take one in and give them a family - rather than just bring another child into the world. |
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Doodlestuff
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Makes me wonder why as well, since they adopted fairly quickly.
A former coworker of mine adopted. Although she was able to have kids, due to having type 1 diabetes the outcome was questionable. So instead of sacrificing her health, and that of a child, she chose to adopt. |
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Brainy
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Rather then bring another child into this already overpopulated world, many people choose to make a home for a child already here in need of one. It's very probable that Cruise & Kidman could not have a child. I'm always a bit curious why celebrities choose to adopt. However if their intentions are honourable-more power to them. |
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Wundt
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Some people believe that the world is overpopulated and don't feel that need procreate. I have several friends who feel this way and have little or no desire to have their own children. I have also had women friends who were afraid of childbirth, and just didn't think they could go through the physical process (many changed this feeling as they got older).
Some of these people have adopted, because they believe that children are important and should have good homes. Even though they don't desire to have their own children. They are doing something truly altruistic. |
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cowboy_fan
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Society tells people they need to try a certain amount of time to have their "own" child before they ever consider adoption. Many couples, like me and my husband, decided not to let society dictate what we wanted to do. We decided to adopt instead of having bio children because it's what we wanted to do.
Many infertile couples are not choosing adoption as a last resort but people treat them that way simply because they did what was socially acceptable. Try for 1 year to have one on your own, spend tens of thousands of dollars on IVF, then you can try to adopt without any ridicule.
Trust me, we raised a lot of eyebrows when we decided to adopt before trying to have a bio child. Many people want to adopt but aren't willing to face the ridicule of people, so they fall into the order society dictates. |
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R
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Various reasons. The woman may not want to get pregant for her job, figure etc. Or in my wife's case she can but she has been advised not to do it again so we are adopting our second child.
Others do it because they really want to help a child/childern in need before adding to the world |
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mscrawdad
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They adopt to provide a home for children who would otherwise spend years in foster care and maybe never have a stable home with a family that loves them. |
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thatswhatshesaid
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I don't know exactly why we chose to have biological kids before adopting, each situation just felt right at the time.
I can tell you this though... if we had realized how wonderful our adoption experience would be, we would have done it a lot sooner. |
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angelbaby
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Why not? Just cuz people end up having their own biological kids, it doesn't mean they can't or shouldn't adopt. They are giving a home to a child who already exists without a loving family to be a part of. What's the harm in giving them that? I too wondered why Tom and Nicole never had kids, but are able to have them now, but I guess it's not really our business anyway. But yeah, the curiosity is still there. |
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Still Me
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WHY NOT? |
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Fishergirl
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Some people adopt becuase they know there are so many children in this world just waiting for someone to love them and take care of them. Some people also don't want to bring more children in this crazy world and want to help those already here. |
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whatever!
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Some people think that they can't have kids and then after adopting they have kids. Others adopt just because they want to open their home and hearts to kids that need a home. Then there are the celbs who do it as a status quo, and i think that reason is very wrong!! |
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evita
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they want to help this children that dont have a home and family that care and gives them love. if i had money i would love to adopt a child and i can have kids of my own i already have a baby boy. |
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karateJenn
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i can have children of my own, in fact i have a daughter of my own. i am looking forward to adopting soon though. mostly because i am a mom, i love being a mom, it makes me soooo sad to think that there are kids in this world that need parents, that are being rased in orphanages. i could have more children "naturally", but what about the kids that need parents? its seems irresponsible for me to have children fully knowing that there are many out there waiting for familys. |
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Crucio
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I agree why not, as hard as it may be for some people to grasp, there are people out there that that choose to adopt children even if they have bio children or may later have bio children. Actor Kirk Cameron and his wife adopted 4 children prior to having 2 biological children. It was never an issue about conceiving they wanted to adopt and they wanted to adopt before even trying for biological children. Maybe someone wants to add on to their family but would rather give a home to children who are already here vs brining another child into our already overpopulated world.
As far as Tom and Nicole only they can know why they choice to adopt. Heck its still highly speculated by some that Suri isn’t even Tom’s bio daughter. Same thing with Michael Jackson and his 3 kids. I have seen Tom talk speak of all his children and its clearly he loves and adores all of them adopted and bio |
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sam22254
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Gets me but I know that Mormon couples are taught in church to adopt first. Give a child a home then most have children of their own and this child is left to wonder why. And what i believe is that most famous couples don't want to mess up there body's with child births |
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I love Jesus!
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Because there are good people in this world and want children to have homes. God Bless! YAY JESUS! |
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Stinkerbell
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Whats wrong with giving innocent children a better life by adopting? I am sure they have thier reasons for adopting, whether public or private.And is it really our business if they had trouble concieving? Its very devastating for some couples who cant concieve. Who are you to judge? She did have 2 miscarriages.. check out the website
I also believe some celebrities adopt for the right reasons and others do it for publicity.. who shall remain nameless. |
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Babi G
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some peoples DNA is uncompatible and makes it virtually impossible to have kids.You also have to consider that they were both problely very stressed out in life.
Everyone deserves to be loved.You ask why people adopt?Maybe you should think about why people abandon children? |
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Sarah
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When Tom & Nicole were together, I heard/read that she didn't want to get pregnant, so as to not mess up her pretty body. Perhaps she's matured a bit and is ready to have a baby. I've never heard that she has had miscarriages. |
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DarthFangNutts
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Maybe because the world already has too many people, and the definition of "parents" has changed from even just twenty years ago. There are so many children out there, who should not have been born, but are, and so they need a good loving home, just as much as anyone else.
My wife and I have two beautiful biological children, but we've decided to adopt a baby and are in process now.
Just because you CAN have children, doesn't mean you should. |
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