 
|
Kate
|
One's life is not perfectly fine in means of being an adoptee or biological parent. You can move on with your lives, however, the loss will always remain.
I have never seen searching for biological parents to be courageous, it can be a difficult and stressful experience not knowing what outcome will occur, but not an experience I would consider someone courageous for choosing such desire.
A consider it for an adoptive parent courageous as they allow their child to possibly have another family, well biological family in their lives, etc. |
|
I Love A Child With Autism!!!
 |
Because they have the balls to face the unknown. They put all the $hit that they (and you) have been programmed to believe and they follow their gut. They have a primal draw to find those they came from. They throw caution to the wind and put themselves out on a limb in hopes they can make a connection to those who share their DNA. Courageous...you bet your whiny a$$ it is.
How is it courageous to never break out of your shell and just feed off the hogwash that has been fed to you. Cowardice is when you are too scared to take the next step because of fear of rejection. I think you are there...get a set and take the plunge! You really need to stop being afraid of what you can't comprehend. |
|
Laurel J
|
Because it is scary--the adoptee risks a second rejection, and is venturing into unknown territory. S/he might find anything. And the relationship between the adoptee and the only parents s/he has ever known may well be strained or otherwise tested. It is also, in many cases, illegal--the adoptee risks having charges filed for looking at his/her own ID papers.
The quest for self and identity, the hero's journey, the step off the known into the unknown is always scary and always requires courage. Whether we are adopted or not, we take this journey because it's what makes us human.
I find it fascinating that Joseph Campbell said refusing the quest is part of the quest too. |
|
cantstopLinnyG
|
Because it is the exact opposite of being cowardly and afraid of knowing your truth. My life was disrupted by adoption and the lies and guilt thrust upon me by people who thought they knew what was best for me.
You're almost there Ollieo. I cannot wait until you finally puke up the kool-aid. |
|
kitta
 |
Ollie,
It is considered an act of courage to search because the government has made it very difficult to do it.
The records are sealed in most states. Searches are expensive. Searches are emotionally draining.
And people are very discouraging of those who wish to do it.
That is why. |
|
Mei-Ling
|
Why WOULDN'T it be?
I didn't disrupt anybody's life. No, srsly, I didn't.
Oh wait, I am talking to a wall of "Blah blah I can't hear you!"
*shakes her head*
Oh well. Maybe if you keep posting such baiting questions, I can increase my typing skillz from 90wpm to 100wpm without getting Carpal Tunnel Syndrome! ^_^
Thanks OllieO! |
|
Flying Monkey #073177
 |
What is truly courageous is admitting that you don't have enough room in your two-sizes-too-small heart for your natural parents! I commend you for being upfront and honest about your tiny love centre! |
|
PhilM
|
Because people like you attack and demean people who search. In the face of such hostility, it takes courage to stand up for your own truth and your own story. |
|
amyburt40
 |
Yes it is courageous. Too bad you are a scarety cat. |
|
chickenfarmer
|
This almost reads like one of susie sunshine's questions.... |
|
Rowan
|
Because for the adoptive child, it's a huge risk, when you think about it. They risk finding their parents have died, or don't want contact, or a myriad of other things.
It's unknown, potentially hurtful, territory. An adoptive opens themselves up to quite possibly being hurt and rejected.
I think it's couragous in some cases yes.
There are many on here who searched, only to find the bio parents had been looking for them as well. So they weren't "disrupting" lives, as you put it. |
|
Randy B
|
Why is asking baiting questions considered helpful? Really now, if someone wants to ask non-productive and senseless questions that is perfectly fine for them. Humorous?????? |
|
Independ"ant"
 |
You sound more and more like a "threatened childish Ap" with every question you ask. I hope for the sake of children..you're not.
Facing and dealing with trauma is very courageous emotionally.........would you tell parents who have children with autism they are not courageous for fighting the insurance companies and gov't for more support and acknowledgment as well as awareness to the issue.
As far as disrupting.....I hope you do realize that is just your 10cent opinion and adoption propaganda to silence adoptee's and natural parents. |
|
Second C
 |
Ollie,
As I do not know you or know your life journey I cant speak for you about this subject. But for me I have no beginning to dwell on for as much as I know for fact I was born in a courtroom in Cook County Illinois at 6 months old. |
|
Cindy B
|
The adopted child's life has already been disrupted through no fault of his or her own. If they want to search its their right.Any person who adopts a child should know that one day the child will want to know where they came from. |
|
♣Lash Cat♥
|
its courageous because you are totally putting yourself out there which is a scary thing to do. You don't know if you are gonna get rejected or embraced by your birth parents which is also really scary. And If you get rejected you have to deal with feelings of rejection which you might already have being given up in the first place so now your dealing with twice the rejection from the same ppl or person. If that makes sense. I think its courageous when ppl embrace their feelings and when you search for your birth parents (to me) it shows you are embracing your feelings. |
|
Heather B
|
Because it is |
|
Anha S
 |
Yes, you betcha it is. Why? Because it flies in the face of what's acceptable. The rainbows and candy floss pooping ponies camp is very strong out there. There are so many roadblocks out there for an adoptee wanting to search, with many venemous awful people in their way ready to take them to task for whatever view of adoption that adoptee happens to be shattering for them. Its courageous to wade through all that muck to find one's truth.
My life got jacked up when I was relinquished and saw multiple homes before my first birthday. I didn't consent to any of that. I was perfectly justified in working to find my own truth. Because for once I had a say in something, and people like you weren't going to stop me. |
|
DevonChaos
|
Because if someone chooses to search on their own, despite all the negatives that can come from it (aparents disapproval... chance at finding out something negative... etc...) and ask the questions that they want answered, it takes courage and strength.
Facing what I was given? I was given 2 sets of parents. I want to find out about the ones that are being hidden from me. I believe that THAT takes courage. |
|
Not Adopted
 |
Because I said so. |
|
almost human
|
People keep telling me that and I shyly protest. Yet your question makes me realize that maybe I am courageous.
For me to search:
- I have had to fight the world's largest adoption agency to get my documents.
- I have to travel 6,000 miles to another country.
- I have to learn another language so I can communicate should I find them.
- I have to go on television and tell my private story publicly to an entire nation just for the slim chance they will be listening.
But these things don't take half the courage it took to finally acknowledge that adoption was an issue in the first place, because I'd spent forty years rejecting that idea. My whole life fell in place after taking that step.
. |
|
Cam
|
Because often the motivation is just to find their original identity but sadly rejection happens in the process. That takes guts. |
|
Possum
|
Far far more courageous than asking baiting questions such as this.
I now understand.
You have no heart.
Sad for you. |
|
sunny
 |
Because we stand up when the whole world tells us to sit down. |
|
Opedial
|
Facing questions about who they are, and the possibility of being rejected or not accepted or all the feelings I can only imagine them feeling...that is courageous. |
|
Helena B
|
http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Park/2070/ohyea3.GIF |
|
Carol c
|
Only a courageous and intellectually curious person would understand.
You'll never get it, my dear.
So why are you still here spending so much time asking the same questions phrased differently over and over ad nauseum?
How very sad. |
|
kidmindi
|
My birth mother didn't consider it a disruption in her life when I found her. She was THRILLED beyond words that I found her. And when I found my brother last month, she was thrilled that I had found him as well. In fact she told me that I was her angel for reuniting all of her children, and that if she died today she would die happy knowing where all of her children were and that they were doing well.
I don't really think that searching is courageous. I think it is a choice that each adopted person and birth parent must make for themselves.
When I contacted my brother for the first time, I told him that if he wanted no contact, I would respect that, and I would have. However is is happy to be able to get to know his 3 sisters and his mother. |
|
Jennifer L
|
I have to disagree with you here. I always think it is courageous to step outside one's comfort zone and take a risk. |
|
gypsywinter
|
Could it possibly be...that Ollie is a shill for the NCFA? Makes one wonder when reading his/her questions. |
|
myst1998
|
Hey OllieO (sounds like Oreo LOL but you are no where near as sweet)
Why do you care so much? Why should it matter to you what others think if you are so dead against it? <sigh> I am sorry you are not brave enough to find your mother, YOU will therefore miss out on knowing your roots and heritage which is sad for you even if you CAN'T see it because of the blinders you are wearing. |
|
|
|
|
No Spam
Adult 
Gambling
Unfinished
Deception
Plagiarism
Not English
