Would you put ur child up for adoption just because its not ur husbands?

Mom to Foster Children

1. Wouldn't cheat
2. Wouldn't dare put a child through "being adopted" and go through the pain my son does on a daily basis
3. Yep I am disgusted.

Destiny

Well, I first of all wouldn't be cheating on my husband so I would never be in this situation. But if I was, NO I would not!! They are still my children, and they are STILL my responsibility. That's a ridiculous reason for setting a child up for adoption, unless she couldn't support them financially/mentally.

Judith

Does she know for sure that the child is not her husbands? Anyway it shouldn't matter. If she is going to stay with her husband and she believes that he will be abusive or neglectful toward the child then perhaps it would be best. Considering the current state of the marriage she would probably be doing that child a big favor. She should get her damn tubes tied.

LaraSue

It's pretty easy to sit in judgment isn't it?
Every situation is different and I can't say what I would do.

melissa

I would never choose someone else over my child.

HappyMomAnna

I myself find it to be upsetting however, I think that if the husband were going to treat the child differently and I believed the new baby would be in anyway abused psychologically or emotionally due to this fact it would be better for that baby...

I can't imagine being in the situation and would have to consider ALL of the children involved. It the other children would also be hurt by a horrible divorce or situation in the home I would have to weigh this into the situation too.

I have a cousin who was the 6th child for a married couple and her mother cheated--she was adopted as an infant by my aunt and uncle.

I also know a woman who had 2 children and a third as a result of an affair about 10 years ago. When the third baby was born there was no doubt he didn't have the same father. After two years of keeping this baby things in the marriage fell apart to a point that all three children were placed into Foster Care and eventually the husband gained custody of the two children that were his--and the wife gained custody of the affair baby.

This was very traumatic for all three children and there is no erasing the fact a child lived in a foster family. I feel that all of the children were damaged and the family destroyed over the affair and baby. I however, do not believe it is anyone else's decision about how to handle these things.

I feel that if the mother knows all of the children can or will be hurt by her choice then she knows what is best for all of the children involved.

Very hard moral dilemma but, unfortunately happens far too often.

Philippa

I personally wouldn't but then I wouldn't cheat on my husband in the first place.

Without knowing all the facts I still believe she should raise all her children.

TRUTH

Disgusted?? Noo Well what she did is wrong but funny.Its smart but a little unfair because she is givng the package to someone else to take care of.She is something to admire lol. Bandit.If she does not want the kid and besides going through that hell.Its not bad that she is giving it away.
What is baaddd is that she cheated that is terrible but giving away the baby its no big deal.relax woman!!!

Freckle Face

I would show the man the door before i would let one of my children go.

MamaKate

Dear Misslm,

I am more concerned about her poor child(ren). The baby did not ask to be created into such a situation and will now have to lose their family! What about respect for the BABY and his or her bonds and ties to the mom? what about the baby's rights to have his or her natural family, original birth certificate, blood siblings, etc.? What about her other children? Is it fair for them to lose their sibling? Is she trying to punish herself or her child?

I think this woman should come clean, get into couple's counseling and respect her child's rights. I am not "disgusted" by her, but I think she needs some serious help to deal with this. I'm sure she is suffering from her poor choice. I hope that she will not choose to compound it...

Dusti B

I don't believe in giving up your children. its wrong.

Kitty0123

thats *u*ked up...
its still her child wheather she likes it or not.

dustee

NO
dont put your child up for adoption Tell hbbuy its his, it will save a lot of problemsw

wizard of the East

From your question it appears that the woman had not cheated but was tricked/raped and hence she has decided not to raise the child.

sizesmith

First of all, it's a horrible situation, no matter what, lives are destroyed.

She kept her children with her husband, and I'm assuming stayed with the husband to work out the marriage. That's at least 2 othes that stayed with their natural parents.

In her situation (which I would never allow myself to be in), she could have taken away all her children from their father (face it-in divorce, somebody's not going to be around the children), and placed 1 child, who's life would probably be considered a mistake to her and the husband forever. This child who was placed I believe was placed for it's own better life, because it would have been in a no-win situation. The other kids probably would have blamed this baby for breaking up their parents. It's a no-win situation for all involved. I know of a woman in our town who did this, and unfortunately, the marriage ended up bust a few years down the road anyway. I think the child placed is probably happier than it would have been with the natural mother, and her husband.

mhah

No!!! Her other children should be taken away from her. With that selfish, disgusting decision....she is NOT mother material.

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