what is an open adoption?

Jennifer L

An open adoption is a non-binding agreement between the biological parent(s) and the adoptive parent(s) to have some sort of ongoing communication. It can involve anything from yearly pictures and letters to regular visits, exchange of phone numbers, and so forth. It can really be whatever the two parties agree upon. If both sets of parents can come to an agreement where they are both comfortable, respect boundaries and keep to the terms of the agreement, an open adoption can be very good for a child, if an adoption must take place.

However (and this is a big one), open adoptions are NOT legally enforced. So, there is nothing to prevent either party from suddenly deciding to stop contact. If you place your child for adoption and the adoptive parents refuse to honor the open adoption agreement, you have no recourse. You cannot go to the adoption agency, the police or a lawyer. The adoptive parents are NOT legally obligated to follow through with their agreement.

Wellspring

Open adoption is a ruse to get expectant mothers to sign away their babies on the basis of pre-adoption promises which are legally unenforceable afterward.

ETA: Simply put, once a mothers signs the papers to give her baby away, the adopters can break every promise to communicate afterward and close the adoption (most do). The mother may never see her baby again.

Andraya - Snark's Sister

Most often it is a series of lies designed to make you comfortable enough to surrender your child. The lies are usually along the lines of; You can see him/her once a year, we will send you pictures twice a year, you will always know where we live, you will be like a member of the family etc. These promises are rarely kept and there is no legal way to make sure they are.

Vanessa

what is an open adoption?

A LIE.

LinnyG

It is a ploy agencies and prospective adoptive parents use to get women to surrender their children. Open adoptions are NOT LEGALLY ENFORCEABLE ANYWHERE. Dont do it. You will never recover from giving your child to strangers. Babies do not want things. They want their natural mothers.

grapesgum

Open adoption is a scam invented by the adoption industry to get more babies to sell on the adoption market. Agencies and lawyers tell adoptive parents to lie about wanting an "open" adoption because they know that open adoption is not legally enforceable. The natural parents are lured into a so called "open" adoption and give their baby away. Once the ink dries on the adoption papers, the adoptive parents kick the natural parents to the curb. This is exactly what happened to my daughter's best friend.

Open adoption has the same pain as a closed adoption for the child who is abandoned by his/her natural family and is sent away to live with strangers.

Lady Rowan

A ploy to get young vulnerable women to sign over their rights to their children. They are not legally binding and anyone who tells you they are either have an agenda or are misinformed.

Don't give up your baby. I know things are tough right now but there are ways!

H******

A marketing tool to entice women to part with their babies willingly

The door usually slams shut on you afterwards though. Be very careful.

cricketlady

It's only open til the Judge grants the adoption---it is not enforceable.

smarmy

It's a ploy, it's a hand shake agreement that has no legal backing what so ever, and its a lie. Adoptive parents are told that they do not have ot honor it. They are told that once everything is in order all they have to do is move and change their phone number.

And everyone super nice till they get your signature.

Julie B

I'm very sorry to hear that so many people have had such a bad experience with an open adoption. My husband and I are planning to adopt, and we absolutely are going to keep to our word when it comes to the communication agreements. I suppose we are in the minority in being honest and true to our word, but I guess I wanted to let you know that not all adoptive parents are horrible people who won't stick to their communication promises.

Phaery G

The advantage of an open adoption is that you get to choose the parents for your baby. Unlike a closed adoption, where both sides remain anonymous to each other, an open adoption lets you meet the parents before the baby is born. You'll probably be given a list of various couple who want to adopt, along with information about their occupations, hobbies, religious views, and so forth. You can choose the family based on whatever critieria matters most to you.

However, you may or may not be able to have continued contact with them after the adoption. Whatever they promise you (to send photos, let you visit the baby, etc.) may not be legally enforceable. They may start out fully intending to involve you, but then decide that it's too overwhelming. So if you opt for adoption, be aware of this before you sign anything.

You may still want an open adoption, so that you can at least meet the people who'll be raising the baby. Just be aware that they may, or may NOT, allow you to be involved in the baby's life after adoption, no matter what they tell you beforehand.

Gina

Yes an open adoption is an agreement between the expectant mom and the potential adoptive family to send photos, letters, and visits if agreed upon. Yes, there is NO legal obligation to uphold the agreement. I would like to say all adoptive families uphold their part of the agreement but unfortunately that is not always the case. For answers to your specific questions you can look at Bethany Christian Services website at www.bethany.org or even call and speak with one of their counselors nationwide at 1-800-Bethany. We are one of their approved families who are seeking to adopt. We see the value to you, your child, and our family in an open adoption. If you would like to know more about us you are welcome to visit us at www.seekingopenadoption@blogspot.com.

Skadoctor1

It varies dependant on the stipulations set forth within the open adoption. Some open adoptions require the adoptive family to produce photos and an update letter which is passed from them to a 3rd party (generally the adoption agency) to the birth parents. Other times, the birth family is able to have visitation with their biological child and keeps in contact with the adoptee family. But, in a nutshell it means that the adoption isnt sealed by the courts so that identities and history and even meeting between biological child/parent can exist.

Pearl L

it means you can keep in touch with your baby and see him or her regularly but someone else raises it

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