Leaving letter to my parents..?

Venetian Renaissance Bomb

You don't owe them an explanation. If it would make you feel better, leave them a note. You describe an abusive dysfunctional family, and I'm sorry you've had to live through that. You're an adult, and if you want to leave it's your prerogative. It's likely that your father will resort to contacting the police. Since you are an adult their options are limited. Yours however are not. I would contact the police or some other authority and let them know what has been going on in your family and that you are leaving. maybe they can help you with an escape plan.
I wish you the best.

JenVT

If you are 19 years old then you have every right to leave your parents home and make your own life. Once you are 18 you are considered an adult in the US and that gives you the right to make your own choices and mistakes. Leave them a note so they don't report you as a missing person, but the police cannot make you return home.

~*~Diana~*~

they cant do anything you're 18 if you dont want to live with them

dollface

your 19 legally they cant do n e thing

jackson

Ypu are over 18 so even if they report you as a missing person and you are found...... you are not missing.

I was in your shoes long ago. I realized that just leaving would probably not end up so well financially.... what you call good money at 19 is not going to go far. I pondered as to go about it.

My solution was to join the military. Parents could not say much as the deed was done and you can't be said to be irresponsible. I immediately was able to get away with all my needs met. I took classes in the military and now make more than any body in my family ever saw in their life.

I stayed away from my family for years. But years later it got sorted and now I (of all people) am considered the wise and smart one.

But no matter what you do do not base your life and decisions on some guy you wish to date. Try to name one person that you know that met at 18 and are still together years later.

It is showtime. What you do now will determine your life. You can't bank on anybody except your family and yourself. Yourself being the main thing.

Rob

Your 19? your free. You do now what is best for you! I left home at 16 and hadn't spoke to my parents till I was 21, now we are great friends. Your 19 and found someone who makes you happy, your happy and your own Father isn't happy for you? Something is wrong with him and threatening violence, that is illegal you should remind him of that in your letter as well as to why you decided to leave.If your Mother isn't as much to blame then you should leave her a seperate note where she will only find it. Mothers take it harder.

UNSC

It is your personal right to leave at the age of 18 since, are a you adult after truing 18th. So the way it sounds I'm guessing your Asian, because i have the same problem. My dad wants $650 for college, and I make $700 every two weeks, $350 is to bills at he pays for and the rest is for college. He doesn't care what he have to say. So I let him know that after college I'm not giving him one penny of what I make. I have tried to save money but its hard when I have to deal with him. Its OK to feel like what you do. They think they are doing something good and are trying to protect you that's all, they are don't want you do get hurt. But they need to see what you are not that kid anymore. Its fine to leave them,but you will Always miss them in your heart because the world is unforgiving at times, but they don't want any harm to come to there child they have cared for 19 years.

shocked

You are 18, get your own apartment, stop being a victim of them!
You do not have to leave the state, they have no say over you.

I know it is hard, my youngest half sister was physically and emotionally abused by my stepfather, but she did not want to leave, even after she was in her twenties, because the abuse had her head screwed up! She is much older now, and he died last month, and it is the first time she has felt free of him.

Don't let that happen to you! Be strong! Get counseling if needed to break away from the rotten situation!

God Bless, and please be strong!!

Kimberly D

I feel very bad about your situation. You are a legal adult once you reach 18. And if you live on your own, your parents won't have a say over any of your decisions. I'm not sure what your question is, but if you write a letter explaining that you are leaving to pursue a life on your own, I don't think they would be able to file a missing person report. It's very sad thou that once you leave, you won't be able to go back. I feel that you are leaving out a good portion of the story. I sincerely wish the best to you. Good luck.

Ralfcoder

I can't answer your question, but I will suggest that you keep at least one line of communication open. Maybe a cousin or favorite aunt or uncle, or a family friend? In a few days, couple of weeks or months, etc, maybe you'll be in a position where you want to or need to talk to your family.

And you say you make good money. How will that continue if / when you leave? If you have a job, can your parents find you there? Or is the source of the money something that you do anywhere?

Think carefully about what you are proposing here. You may well want to just enroll in college somewhere instead of running away from this problem. That will separate you from them, and be much less drastic.

APB

I am so sorry about your situation. Legally they can't do anyting.. .you are 18! Also, do you have money , car and a place to go? People aren't as willing to help as you may think. Be careful who you trust and don't put yourself in a situation without an out. we all make tough decisions and I don't think what you are doing is wrong... as long as you are SUPER CAREFUL!!

saved_by_grace

Leave a window open and don't burn all of your bridges. You might want to see them one day. They cannot do a thing if you leave. You are an adult. If you leave a letter then they will know that you are not a missing person.

Jason W

Once they see you are gone and are not comming back they will realize what they have done. Let me ask you this though, have they done something for you or maybe bailed you out of something in the past that makes them think you owe this to them? If not then yeah you need to get out of there but they can report you as missing but the police wont take them very seriously because you left a letter stating your intent to leave. THey cannot have you brought back by force because you are a legal adult and can do pretty much whatever you want. BEcause you are so sheltered though you need to make sure this guy is worth it because if this hasnt happen to you alot then you will realize in life and when your young every guy is going to be the love of your life and if you owe them for something major you did then you may not want to burn that bridge just yet as you never know you may need them in the future and they wont be there for you.

franceman

I'm sorry to hear that you are so miserable. Life is pretty unfair. I'm sorry that your parents make you feel as if you as a slave. At age 19 you are grown up, but in the eyes of the law, you are still a minor. Leaving a letter for your parents is a good idea, but they will still report you as a run-away. I can't tell you how to make a run for it because I don't know the whole story. I all the money you make goes to them, do you see the money or are they just saving it for you for college.
Try this on them. enroll at a college out of state. you will be free to do what ever you want once you are there and you'll get an education that will help open many doors to you.
Once you are done with school, you don't have to go back to them and you'll be free to pursue a career, relationship and whatever else life has waiting for you.

duginforgood

you're 19 so you have every right to leave.

but

you're 19 so chances are you are exaggerating on the story a bit.

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