Opinions on this case of "child abandonment"?

On Monday, my sister called me to pick up her daughter. The daughter had skipped school and was gone all day with a boy in his car (she's 14 years old). My sister has had a lot of problems with this kid as far as not turning in homework, mouthing off, running away and getting in trouble at school for fairly minor stuff- talking to friends etc. My sister is not afraid of using physical punishment including sitting on her daughter (about 100lb weight difference), punching including in the face, and slapping. She also likes to name call and tease, basically acting like a bratty sibling trying to get a rise. When she gets the rise she gets to punish. So I think all this is her fault too, not just my niece. The Department of Human Services HAS been called and they have investigated and evidently all this "discipline" is okay. So the question, my sister now says she's finished with this kid and she permanently has to find somewhere else to live and that she's not supporting the child "with even one dime." Legally, can she do this? I think my niece should not live with her mom but I really don't feel like this is MY problem. My sister kicked her out with sandals (we live in Iowa), no coat, no hygiene stuff, and one pair of jeans, one pair of sweats and 3 shirts. Opinions?
Additional Details
Do you think I should have to pay (financially) for this kid? Maybe it's harsh but I've bought her tennis shoes, hygiene stuff, and it takes me an hour per day to transport her to/from school. In June I start working swing shift and can NOT drive her. Is there a way to MAKE my sister pay support at least?

Nature Boy

First off, you can't just refuse to take responsibility for your child. You are required by law to support them until they are 18, or emancpated. Failure to do so will result in parental prosecution. Even if the Child Welfare people take her and put her in Foster care, or Juvie Hall, the parents will still have to pay Child-Support to the state for her upkeep.

And kicking her out is subjecting the mother to criminal charges.

I don't think you are getting the whole story, because there is no way that Child Welfare told her that hitting her daughter in the face was 'OKAY'. Not only is it not OK, but it constitutes Assault and Battery of a Minor, even if done by a parent. In TN., she would would be UNDER the jail! They would have to mail daylight to her.

Physical assault (slapping, spanking, etc....) is seldom productive, and can cause permanenet issues. Since this woman obviously did not care enough to seek counseling and guidance, both for her, and her daughter, then the best thing would be to stick the mother in jail, and the child in a Home where she can be motivated towards suitable behavior.

Scooter

Your sister sounds like a real piece of work! However, your statement that you don't feel like this is YOUR problem concerns me as well. Even if your niece is a handful, she is still your family. Are you going to just let her wander...at 14?! Shame on you for even having to post this question. We may not always like what life throws at us, but we have to do the right thing. I would take her in and set some ground rules, it will be difficult at first but I think she might prosper in a "normal" environment.

Also, after you get guardianship of your niece I would forbid your sister from coming to your house or interacting with your niece.

just my two cents

EagleFan25

It sounds like your sister is more immature then the 14 year old. I do not condone beating or hitting in the face any child, now on the other hand I think that spanking is okay, but hitting in the face is uncalled for. How in the world can DCFS or whoever investigated say that the punished was necessary.Well to be honest I would not let her go back to her mom. I take it she is living with you? Her mom needs to go to prison for neglect, but I guess that is not going to happen. I would get child support from the mom, she kicked her out and by law you cannot do this until she is considered an adult. Sorry about this, hopefully she doesn't have to go back to that hostile home. Report her mom for something, don't let her get away with abuse

lucy

Your sister is wrong! She cannot legally cut off support until your niece is 18. Sounds like a very troubled situation. You may be her only hope even though you didn't sign up for the responsibility. Your niece will end up pregnant, in jail, or dead if she continues on this path. Your sister needs to be sat on and slapped!

Charles B

They both need to be incarcerated. Yes it's abandonment.

Lucky Dragon

To answer your question, you'd probably be best off talking to a lawyer or similar specialist. This sounds like a pretty heavy situation and you don't want to get caught in the middle of a legal storm just because you were trying to do the right thing. Make sure you know what your rights are, as well as your sister's and niece's.

As for an opinion: your sister sounds like a nutjob (all due respect). Judging by the example she seems to be setting with her emotional and physical abuse (punching your children in the face is not normal, regardless what Human Services says), it's no wonder her daughter is a little maladjusted.

Just curious

i know from personal experience, i used to run away and not listen to my mom. and there was really nothing she could do. but punching her and kicking her out is ridiculous. there are other things that could have been done. she is not your responsibility. your sister should be arrested.

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