Please help me. should i try to say sorry and patch up once again?
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Please help me. should i try to say sorry and patch up once again?
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i lost a friend as i got possessive and insecure and became a pest/clingy. we happen to work at the same office. things ended bad. after my friend decided to cut me out, i tried to get a last chance and called her and e-mailed her a few times and went by her office etc. she told me she would call the cops on me as i was not lettings things rest. i do not know if that was a threat or she meant it. i stopped. months later, guilt killed me and i wrote a long apology letter and i left it at her desk at work. i never heard back. i assume she got it?
now, she is leaving town for good. should i
1) not say goodbye at all
2) go by and ask her if she has a few minutes and talk things out
3) send her a short e-mail saying i am sorry and that i would like to talk and say goodbye?
please help
i am worried she will call the cops on me or think i am obsessed about the friendship or something negavtive instead of taking it as it is meant to be. does she have a case?
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Lexie
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You said you were "possessive and clingy", which led to the breakup of the friendship to begin with. She was concerned enough that she threatened to call the police. You tried once again to patch things up, with a long letter to which she has not responded. Now you want to get in touch with her again.
Which part of "no" is it you don't understand? Let it go. She doesn't want to be your friend. She has the right to decide that. If you respect her as a human being, leave her alone. Forget about whether she would "have a case" if you contact her. Everything isn't about you.
I have a feeling you are a bit on the obsessive side, whether it is apparent to you or not. If you can't seem to let this go, I would suggest you speak to a therapist. |
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Bobby
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First of all it's good that you stopped when she asked you too. Maybe she just needs time. You tried and that is all you can do.
If you continually try to contact her after she tells you not too it would be a form of harassment.
It's not a crime to try again. You said it was months ago since you last tried to get in contact with her.
I personally would send her an email again stating you are sorry,you want to patch things up, and have a chance to say goodbye. Let her decide what she wants to do. If she says she's not interested or doesn't get back to you, let it go. You can't force her to do something she doesn't want to do.
As for her calling the police, she can, but nothing will come of it. As long as the email has nothing offensive, and it's been months since you last contacted her, it's not harassment as defined by law.
But again, if she doesn't want to see or talk to you, let it go.
Good luck. |
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