I am being terrorized by a senior co-worker and screamed at daily, what should I do?

bmattj121

Warn your supervisor that your coworkers behavior falls within the realm of harrassment as it "creates a hostile work environment" and as such, you have full rights to file a claim against her. If your supervisor does nothing, he/she too can end up in trouble for their inaction.
Then talk to your Equal Opportunity Advisor about the problem. There are formal and informal steps that can be taken and they will be able to advise you on what you can do.

ahill_hokie

I would do what you can to grin and bear it...literally. I have found that the best way to fight off an office tyrant is to be super-sticky sweet nice to them even when they are rude. It usually will throw them off at first, and then just make them madder. Sooner or later, they will quit bothering you. At least that is what happened to me. All-in-all, it became kind of fun for me to play this game. It is sad, though, when professional adults have to resort to game playing. Good luck!

BigKev 2 (level 5)

I'd love to hear the other person's side of the story.

I have reservations when someone describes themselves as, "very attractive" .....

You say you are being "terrorized" yet no-one else at your workplace seems to be supporting you. You say no-one will say anything because this terrorist is very valuable to the company.

For you to form the opinion that this other woman (described as being between 250 & 275 pounds) is jealous of you because you get attention from the men - demonstates that you have an inflated opinion of yourself.

Maybe if you concentrated on your work & not worried about the attention of male co-workers you wouldn't get such attention from this terrorist fiend!

DAR76

You have to go to HR to see what you can do. Being yelled at all day is stressful and unacceptable. Can you bark back at her and put her in her place? If that doesn't work, can you transfer to another building or dept? Good luck.

SweetPandemonium

follow up with your supervisor to see if anything is being done; if not, escalate to his/her supervisor. or go to human resources to see what recourse is available to you. no one should be subjected to this kind of abuse, or to feel like they should have to quit.

btw, her weight has nothing to do with it, thank you very much.

cookiesmom

can she fire you?....hopefully not....there are a couple of approaches you could take here....first you could speak to her directly and let her know that you do not deserve her verbal abuse nor will you tolerate it and then ignore her when she speaks to you that way...do not respond even if she is asking a direct question (of course do your work so that you are not being insubordinate - which is grounds for firing)...also let your supervisor know that if the behavior continues you will be seeking legal council on the matter.....that SHOULD rectify your problem....if this fails to work for you go out and buy a couple dozen donuts and everytime she starts yelling at you just throw one at her and if she asks what you are doing just look at her and yell "DOWN GIRL!"....if THAT doesnt work then put ipecac in her drink...(that should keep her at bay for a while and maybe even help "expel the demons" lol....i know you really cant do the last couple of things but its still something to hold on to in case the first doesnt work for you...good luck

From Yours Trully

You might want to start keeping a record of the times, dates and what she starts on you about. Does, or has, she done this same thing to other employees?

Your right though, Over weight folks in a position of power do have issues when it comes to someone else getting attention. Especially if there's the possibility of them being over looked for promotion.

This is a form of harassment. After you have sufficient material you could approach your supervisor and tell him/her you going to file a harassment charge against this employee.

Harassment comes in many forms. If she's as valuable to the company as you think she is they'll talk to her once you've made it plain what your intentions are.

Your best approach now though is just smile and thank her for pointing out your error, even if there was none. Remember, your building a case against her. You don't want to give her any grounds to deny that her actions towards you were not abusive.

Also, once a harassment charge has been filed the investigation will bring the other employees into picture.

crazy2all

I would tape record her ranting to play to her supervisor. Of course it can't be used in court if it ever goes that far, but at least you will have prove that she is a nut job.

You can also talk to a lawyer about hostile work environment. There is no reason that you should have to put up with that abuse, and that's exactly what it is.

Good luck to you.

Dinosaur

There is not much you can do, just tell her exactly what you said here. Be honest, it'll shut her up.

Dandouna

Well, she probably has very low self esteem and thinks of you as a threat. She probably knows that she is vital to the company and that is the only thing that makes her feel good in her life right now. Maybe she feels like you are looking to replace her and if she looses her place in this company, what is left? She is probably one of those people that work is one of the most important things in her life. I dont have any other solution for you other than filing a formal complaint with the "big-wigs" of the company. Obviously if you cant get results with the people you are complaining to , you should reach higher. No one should be verbally abused or harrassed in the workplace. THere are laws to protect you. But make sure you have voiced to this woman how you do not like how she yells at you and abuses you. You have enough people to back you up in ev event that she denies you ever comfronted her. Good luck!

markar

hello,,buy a digital recorder and let her scream herself and your bosses into a lawsuit.

hensleyclaw

Your company probably has a work place code of conduct. In working for a state agency, we have such a policy. Your best bet would be to take it up with your supervisor and hers. If it is not resolved there, you go to HR dept. You can take it to the top, but in the private sector, that is not advisable. It would not constitute a hostile work environment unless the conduct is related to one of the proctect status (race, gender, religion and age are the common ones). I have had to tell off people before that interfer with my work. Look her in the eye and tell her that she is out of line and needs to pay attention to her own work. Stand your ground but don't yell or use offensive language.

pepper_y2k

Get a tape recorder of what goes on, then play it for your boss. if nothing is done about it, file a formal complaint on her. You can sue each of them for this if it goes on.

whoopswhosfault

Hey, you want to be successful, do what you have to do. America is full of fat people who don't have a problem with walking all over you. Don't let them. If the guys like you they will rally behind you.
Hey she may be better than you now but in a few months if you work hard you will be better.

George D

I would plant drugs in her desk.

But that's just me.

JimSock

File with your HR department. If she doesn't alter her behavior file again. If that doesn't work notify the DOL.

Creating a hostile work environment is against the law.

Before any filing, keep a diary of events.

I'm wondering why you would want to stay with a company that keeps it's MBA's in a 'bull pen' setting.

Dust off your resume and get the hell out of there.

I can't believe that in pursuit of an MBA this stuff was not covered.

I suggest you go back to your school and demand a portion of your tuition back.

Choqs

If your supervisor has done nothing it is time to let them know this can not continue and if they are unwilling to do anything you will have to go over their head. Do warn them that you are prepared to do this, afterall you've got a room full of witnesses to her abuse.
Next time she starts up I would tell her very firmly, "Until you can get yourself under control and talk to me in a respectable manner you are wasting my time, your time and your breath. I don't know what your problem is but I will not be treated way, I have some dignity and self respect." Then walk away. Say it loud enough for others to hear, maybe she will be embarrassed into better behaviour.
Good luck.

ciamalo

No abusive employee is valuable to the company, once they figure the real damages; huge loss in productivity, loss of good employees they've invested in, lousy work atmosphere for what should be an upbeat occupation, and LAWSUITS. The title is senior co-worker, not prez.
Put your complaint about the screaming, the number of occurrences daily, the fact that you feel threatened, names of witnesses, and give your boss fair notice that if something is not done, you will have to go a step higher.
Send a certified letter to the next person in line, if you have to, threatening to sue (let their lawyers figure out what the grounds will be, for now). If that still does no good, sue.
and remember this---in your occupation, there's so much money, they try to make you think you have to put up with whatever trash happens, just so you can be in on it. The secret is that you will always have people looking for you in financial services, and your company has already invested a substantial amount of money in you, as an employee. YOU are valuable to them, and they do not want to see you go elsewhere.
BTW--What would happen if you just matched her tone every time she screamed at you? How many more times would she do it?

Noone i

I suspect you just need to break the tension in the office...

bring a small swimming pool, 4 quarts of Mazola, and have a "throw down rasslin match" right there.

then right after, all of you go down to Happy Hour and shoot the bull. I suspect you will have great fun and end up old wrestling buddies doing shots at the bar.

Oh, the guys and I at the office here thought it was interesting that you felt it necessary to reiterate that you are "very attractive." why was that?

Captain America 2007

I think Mulgabob and Noone i said it best: your story reeks of reasons why you are the "target of unmitigated attacks on you and golly gosh, the gall of that woman!"

Enter Your Message or Comment

User Name:
User Email:
Post a comment: